Voyaging - Chapter 1
It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons – Johann Schiller
What greater thing is there for human souls than to feel that they are joined for life – to be with each other in silent unspeakable memories. – George Eliot
Karik was sure the merko had gone into the stable through the hole in the wall – she'd been carrying enough food that she had to be feeding young, so maybe this time he'd be lucky. He stood still and listened hard. In his imagination, he traced the path a small mammal might take to avoid detection, one that could run up timbers and along rafters with ease on agile, clawed feet.
There....
There was a store box his Pa kept old harnesses and worn-out saddles in. Karik crouched down, then he went very still again. Yes...there it was – the shrill piping of young merkos, shrieking for insects and grubs.
"What are you doing, Ka-chi?"
He fell back, startled, as he heard a girlish laugh. He sighed as he got to his feet and dusted off his pants. No chance now of getting himself a nest of baby merkos, and by the time he came back, the mother would have moved them again. "Nuh-nothing, Meran."
But his visitor crouched down to look where he had been. "What's that noise?"
"Baby mer-merkos. There's a nest b-behind there."
"Yuck, why are you looking for them?"
She looked at him in puzzlement, a look he was used to. None of the children in the village seemed to be interested in the smaller wildlife except as food, however much he tried to tell them that animals like merkos were useful because they killed the pests that ate the crops. They would look at him much as Meran was now, and then they'd laugh. He was used to that too.
Knowing the nest would be abandoned now, he decided to pull the store box away and have a look, but as soon as he moved it, there was a flurry of furry action. Meran screamed in terror. "Get it off me! Get them away, Karik, they bite!"
She was swiping at her clothes and shaking her braid as if there were hundreds of merkos all over her, instead of a single fierce-looking individual who had fallen off her leg almost as soon as it had run up it, before dashing for cover. He shoved the box back and then grabbed her hands. "It's all ri-right. Gone." For a healer's daughter, Meran could be pretty squeamish, he'd always thought.
She went still. "Are you sure?" He nodded. "Oh good. Hate them, they're so ugly, with those noses, they look like they've got something wrong with them."
"The-they ju-just...." He stopped, frustrated at his stupid stutter which was making a simple explanation so hard. He took a deep breath. "They eat in...sects. The...the nose fi-fi...."
"Finds insects?"
He nodded curtly, annoyed at her finishing his words – he hated people doing that to him – then stood and pulled her up. She sat on the store box, idly dusting off her trousers, and then she patted the place next to him to indicate he should sit down. "You're strange, Karik. But you're cute too."
He stared at her. She was smiling at him in a way which he didn't much care for. "Cu-cute?"
"Yes. Pretty." She reached behind him and pulled his braid out. "It's so pale, like a cloud." He was astonished at her boldness, but she seemed not to notice. "But it's not soft...it should be soft with that colour." He pulled the tail of the braid out of her hand, wondering why she was suddenly so fascinated by his hair. It wasn't like she hadn't seen it before. "You're really different. You've even got hairs here...." She touched his face where the slightest wispy moustache was starting to show, much to his intense displeasure. His Pa didn't have hair there. None of the men in the village did.
Karik turned his face away from her hand, wishing she would back off. "Meran, wuh-what do you want?" As if he couldn't guess. He'd seen young girls flirting with some of the other boys in the village – he'd just never thought to be the target of it himself.
"Don't get annoyed, Karik. I'm just talking," she said, sounding hurt. "I did my chores, and Ma's visiting Meis so I thought I'd come find you."
"Oh." She seemed really offended. "S-sorry."
"It's all right. I should have known you'd be down in the dirt, looking at bugs or something."
"N-not bugs."
She laughed a little. "Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to be rude about your pets. You're really strange sometimes." She touched his face again. "But you're really handsome too."
He could feel his face burning, and knew his cheeks would be bright red in a way that those of no other person in the village could turn. Sometimes he wished he could paint his skin brown so he didn't show every passing emotion on his stupid face. "M-Meran...." He was wondering how he could get away from her without hurting her feelings.
She was leaning towards him, as if she was trying to get a closer look at him, but her eyes were half closed. "Mer...." His protest was cut off, not by his stammer this time, but by her lips touching his. He stumbled backward and fell off the box. "Meran, don't!"
But she just followed him down, and suddenly he had a lap full of girl. "What's wrong, Ka-chi? There's nothing wrong with kissing."
Actually, he was pretty sure kissing was on the list of things he really shouldn't be doing – and neither should she. He shoved her and she fell back onto her rump.
"Karik!"
"Meran? Karik?" Meran froze, and when Karik's Pa came around the edge of the stall, Karik knew how it must look to him. "What's going on?"
"Nothing," she said too quickly, scrambling up and looking as guilty as hells.
Pa frowned at her. "Myka was looking for you, Meran. Why don't you run along and see what she wanted?"
She nodded quickly and almost ran out of the stables, leaving Karik still lying on the ground. He really didn't know how he was going to explain this.
His father held out his hand to help Karik up, and he took it, but he didn't look at his Pa as he dusted himself off. "Sit down, son." Karik sat on the box again. "I assume there's a perfectly innocent explanation for what I just saw?" his father asked as he sat down next to Karik.
Karik nodded. "Wuh-wuh...." He stopped, clenching his fist in frustration. Stupid stutter. His Pa put a hand on his shoulder and waited patiently for him to get his mouth under control. "We...were...looking at merkos."
"Merkos? In here?"
"Y-yes. Nest. B-behind here." He pointed down at the bottom of the box. "Gone now."
"Right. And Meran....?"
"Wuh-was being s-silly," Karik said firmly. "She just s-startled me." He didn't want to get her into trouble.
"I bet she did," his Pa said heavily. "I might have a word with that young lady's parents later on, she's getting a bit forward for fourteen." Privately, Karik agreed with him. His father gave him a rueful smile. "I know I can trust you not to hurt her, but she's just not old enough to know what she might be getting into. I'll have a word with her too, if you like."
Karik nodded, appreciating the offer. His Pa wouldn't stammer and blush as he said what needed to be said, and it would be good not to have to hurt Meran's feelings. He was very fond of her, seeing her almost like the sister he'd never had, but it seemed that he really needed to avoid being trapped alone with her for a while until she got this out of her system. At least most of the other girls preferred boys who looked more like they did. Maybe Meran had done it on a dare. It wouldn't be the first time he'd been used that way.
"So why were you hunting merkos again?"
"I wuh-wanted to catch a whole fuh-family this time."
His father chuckled. "You remind me of Kei, you really do. Karik, your mother will have a fit if you keep a whole family of those damn things in the house. You know what she said when the last one got loose."
"I ju-just wuh-want to study them."
"Hmmm, that's what you always say. Maybe we can try and trap them together. It's always easier with two, you know that."
"Yes, Pa."
His father's eyes crinkled up as he smiled. "Good. Now I've got you though, I can ask – how do you like the idea of a trip to Darshek with Risa and me next week?"
Karik stared at him in astonishment. "Me? Really?" He'd been taken to Darshek a couple of time when he'd been much smaller, when his Ma had gone with Pa on one of his trips, but of course, he could remember nothing of it at all. Now he was older, it was his job to look after the remaining beasts while Pa was away. Who would do that if he went?
"Why not? You know Misek and Pia are bringing up a load of seeds and dried plants from the herbarium for me to take to Darshek and Gyo is coming with them. I thought you two might like the chance to see the city – Misek has already said Gyo can go. We could do with the help, with the winter bean harvest coming in – it's a good crop this year and it all needs to go up. I could ask Lori or one of the other men to come, but I'd like your company just this once. "
Karik flushed with pleasure. "I'd ll-like that too, Pa."
Pa slapped his thigh. "Then it's a deal. We can visit Kei and Arman in their house for a change, and you can see how a big important healer lives, eh?"
Karik grinned. His Pa was always teasing uncle Kei about being so high up in the academy now, although Karik wasn't actually sure what he or Arman did. The only time that he'd dared asked Arman, he'd given him an odd smile and said he was just a servant. Which made no sense when Meis had explained what a servant was. Karik couldn't really see Arman cooking or washing dishes, or cleaning a house. That surely had to have been a joke.
Pa wanted him to help with a sick beast that needed catching up so they walked out together to the fenced pens where Pa kept his pack animals. As they climbed through the fence, the sick beast was easy to spot, as he was a little way off from the herd. His father had already tried to catch him on his own but the damn thing was proving uncooperative, he'd said. "Drive him that way, Karik," he said, already walking towards the animal. "Damn, he looks worse. Still spooked too."
Karik nodded, and wondered what Pa would do if this one wasn't going to be fit to travel – it was one of the bigger beasts, one they would need to take the heavy bean harvest to Darshek. Pa usually took eight or so animals, some times as many as sixteen, either tied to the wagons or pulling them in a train. He didn't used to take such big loads, but once Risa had come to work with him, he could manage them. Sometimes he talked about Karik working with him too. Karik wasn't sure he wanted to do that.
The beast they were going to catch up was roaring and being unusually skittish. Pa already had the rope in hand he was going to use to throw over the animal's neck. It was Karik's job to distract it. The other beasts were in the far corner watching them approach their herd mate, but not reacting. It would be different if Karik and his father lost control and the sick beast dashed towards the herd. They had to stop that happening.
"Now, son," Pa said in a calm voice, as if he wasn't talking about the urs beast at all. Karik moved away and when his father nodded, he suddenly flung up his arms. The beast looked his way and started, but Pa had the rope over its neck in an instant. "Get the harness, Karik."
Karik made a grab for the harness on the animal's head, wishing he had his Pa's height as the beast reared up and forced him to jump for the straps. He got a hold of them, but then they were wrenched away as the animal jerked and tore the rope out of his father's hand, then tried to bite him. Pa grabbed the rope again and got hold of the harness, but the beast lashed out with its foreleg, catching Pa on the knee, making him crumple in pain. Then the animal delivered a final insult by kicking his father in the side as it bolted away, leaving him groaning in the dust.
It had all happened so fast, Karik was already trying to chase the animal away as it ran off of its own accord. "Pa!" He dropped to his knees – his father was white-faced and in obvious agony. He didn't know what to do first – if he left Pa like this, the beast might come back and trample him, it was in such a strange mood. He looked around – he could see no one nearby at all. "Help! Someone! Pa's hurt!" He looked down at his father. "Pa, can you walk?"
"No," Pa whispered through gritted teeth. "Get...Jena...."
"But the beasts...."
"Get...her...."
That decided him. His Pa knew beasts better than anyone and if he thought it was safe to leave him, then it was. "I'll be quick."
He never ran so fast in his life, yelling for help – later he would think it was odd how his stutter disappeared completely for those few desperate minutes – and to his relief, he saw Risa coming out of the stables. "Pa's hurt, in the herding pen. Go help, I'll get Ma."
Risa wasted no time, dashing past Karik towards the pen. Karik could then look for his Ma, who was probably still in their house, he thought.
His mother was in the garden, picking herbs. "Ma! Pa's hurt – kicked by a beast!"
She dropped her basket and got up immediately, her face stricken. "How bad, Karik?"
"Knee, side. Not head."
"Oh gods. Right, find Banji and Peit, tell them to bring a litter. Go quickly, son."
She ran into the house, while Karik continued through the village, looking for his father's friends, both big, strong men who could lift another with ease. Peit was at his house, fletching arrows, but told Karik that Banji was at the mine, too far to come quickly. "Lori was up on Fedor's roof a few minutes ago, see if he can come. I'll go to Jena."
Karik ran to the clan head's house, and saw Myka and Meran walking up the street. "Karik, what's wrong?" Myka asked.
"Pu-Pa – hurt. Pens. Need Lori."
"Gods, Jena's gone to him? Meran, go get my kit. Karik, get Lori. Go, Ka-chi!"
And so Karik ran, hoping all the help he was sending to his Pa would do some good. He could see Lori up on the roof, a tile in hand. "Lori! Pa's hurt. I need you!"
Lori threw an arm up in acknowledgement, and disappeared briefly, before coming out from beside the house. "Where?"
"Pe-pens. Beast k-kicked him."
"Pissing hells. Come on, lad. Did anyone get a litter?"
Karik had forgotten to tell Peit to fetch one. "No."
"That's all right, we've got one in the house. Give me a minute." He was already untying his workman's apron as he went inside.
Karik could only wait anxiously, wondering how bad his Pa's injury was. Urs beasts could kill a man, or a carcho who tried to prey on a herd, but the domestic ones were much less inclined to lash out unless they were injured or frightened. Pa had had his share of bruises and bites, but never anything serious. To see his big strong father helpless on the ground like that – it made Karik sick to his stomach with fear.
"Come on, lad, let's find him. Don't look so worried, Reji's tough as tanned jombeker hide."
Karik couldn't find it in him to answer Lori's reassuring smile, but he ran after the man down the street and out to the pen where he could see people clustered around his father. Risa seemed to be keeping the beasts back – Karik couldn't see the injured one, but rather hoped it had just dropped dead, the bad-tempered creature. He came to where Ma and Myka were both tending to his father. Pa was conscious, but also in a lot of pain judging by how he was grimacing and biting his lip. Karik's Ma looked up. "Oh, good, you've got the litter. Lori, Peit, let's get him to the house."
Karik stood aside and let the older, taller men handle things in their own quietly efficient way. His mother didn't look too anxious, but he went to her side as she started to follow the litter. "Ma?"
She turned and gave him a reassuring smile. "Oh, Karik. He'll be all right. He's just got a couple of dreadful bruises and he might have cracked a rib. Don't look so worried, dear."
The endearment cheered him up a little and he was able to walk calmly behind the litter back to the house. He supposed he really ought to stay and help Risa with the beasts, but he needed to reassure himself that his father would be all right.
Pa was carried into the front room and laid on the long chair. Ma and Myka held a low-voiced conference at the door, and then Myka called her daughter to her side. "He'll be fine, Karik. Jena doesn't need us, but she'll need you, so stay and help her, all right?"
He nodded and Myka smiled before she led Meran out. Meran had been avoiding his eyes but Karik had more important things than her feelings to worry about just now.
Peit and Lori were standing out of Ma's way, watching as she probed his Pa's side. Pa was gritting his teeth, but she soothed him gently as she worked. It didn't look as if Pa was dying. Karik came to them and knelt at his mother's side. "Do you n-need help?"
"In a moment, Ka-chi," she said somewhat distractedly. "Peit, Lori, thanks for your assistance – maybe one of you can see if Risa needs a hand."
"We need to...catch that beast," Pa got out in wheezed gasps.
"Oh hush, Reji, let Risa sort that out," Ma scolded.
"Leave it to us," Peit said in his calm, deep voice. "Come on, Lori, let's see what mess Risa's made of things."
Pa made a face at the insult to his partner and then sighed as the door closed. He reached for Karik's hand. "Thanks...son."
"I'm sorry, P-pa. I sh-should have kept huh-hold of the beast b-better."
His Pa shook his head and winced as Ma probed his ribs. "Not your fault. Just an accident."
He still felt guilty, but then his mother turned her head to look at him. "That one's been funny for a day or so. We might have to cut its throat, can't have an animal like that in the herd, right, Reji?"
"No, love. Risa'll...." He winced again as he moved slightly. "Damn it."
"Well, lie still, you idiot. Yes, you've cracked two ribs, I'd be sure of that and you're going to have a lovely bruise. Karik, would you get me the new pot of chuo sap ointment – I just made a batch this morning and it's in the workroom."
Karik nodded and went to his mother's workroom at the back of the house. It stank of tirsel leaf – she had clearly been making up stocks of ointments and creams, which was probably why she'd been in the garden collecting herbs when he'd found her. He collected the large pot clearly marked in her neat hand and brought it back to the front room.
Ma asked him to help take his father's trousers off. When the damage to the knee was revealed, she tsked. "You're going to have trouble walking for a few days, Reji."
"Got work... to do."
"Not in this condition you haven't. Karik, you'll have to help Risa for your Pa. Lori will give you a hand and then Gyo will be here in a couple of days."
"Yes, Ma."
"Good lad. Now lie still, Reji, or this cream will end up somewhere you don't want it."
Pa pulled a comically horrified face, and Karik grinned. His Ma made Pa comfortable and treated his injuries with the ease of long experience, her calm demeanour doing much to reassure Karik. It was obvious that Pa wouldn't make the stairs for a day or two, so she and Karik made up a bed for him on the long chair. Although he grumbled about the things he needed to do, he was still in enough pain for that grumbling to only be token, and once Ma gave him some pijn, he dropped off to sleep. Ma took Karik out to the workroom while she tidied up her kit. "You still look worried, Ka-chi," she said, chucking him under the chin.
He caught her hand again. It was so much easier using her gift to talk to her. It just happened so fast.
I know, dear. You did the right thing, though.
He flushed again. Pa asked me to help with the next caravan, me and Gyo. Do you think he still wants me to go?
She frowned a little. I think he probably does more than ever now. Risa can't manage on his own. He might ask if Lori can go with you, although it's short notice.
He nodded. I want to help, Ma.
Of course you do, Ka-chi. She pulled him to her and kissed his forehead. I can manage with him now. Why don't you go and talk to Risa about helping with the transport? I think he'd appreciate that.
Yes, Ma. I'll come back in an hour or so.
Thank you, Karik. Now go on, your Pa is depending on you.
Arman shook the raindrops off his cloak and cursed the weather soundly as he shivered in his wet clothes. "Not on the wooden floor, Arman," his housekeeper scolded him, coming up to take the cloak from him. "And take those boots off right now."
"Sorry, Pira, I just wanted to get dry. I'm soaked."
She put her hands on her hips to give him a proper glare. "Well, why didn't you put your cloak on?"
He grinned at her. "I got caught by the docks and left my cloak in the carriage. I'm sorry," he said, hanging his head in mock shame.
"Useless man," she grumbled. "Here, give me that shirt and go find a dry one. Anyone would think you'd never seen rain before."
"I wasn't expecting it and I hadn't realised how dark it had got."
"Oh, that's just silly. Go and find Kei, he'll tell you you're silly too."
"Yes, Pira," he said meekly, handing over his wet clothes. He would need to change his trousers, but he wasn't going to do that in the hall. "Is he in the library?"
"Where else? Go on, I'll tell you when supper's ready."
"I'm starving, I hope it won't be long."
"It'll be ready when it's ready, Arman, don't be greedy."
"Yes, Pira."
She could have let him have some bread, he thought disconsolately, but Pira didn't like him making raids on her kitchen, and Arman had long ago given up trying. It was a small price to pay for a quiet, comfortable household. It used to irk Arman that they needed a housekeeper, but he knew it was simply practical – they had too many claims on their attention and time to spend it on routine chores. And Pira needed the position and the accommodation, so it all worked well.
As he walked into the library, Kei held up a hand without turning around, still scribbling furiously, so Arman waited patiently for his lover to finish recording the thought he had in his head. Finally Kei stopped, and turned to him with a big smile already on his face. "Sorry about...well, look at you," he said, one eyebrow raised. "A firm admirer of your beautiful body though I am, Arman, I have to say I'm a little surprised at this display," he added. "Pleased, but definitely surprised."
Arman grinned and came over to him. "Warm me up, I'm frozen."
Kei put his hand back up again with a look of horror on his face. "Not on your life – gods, Arman, did you jump in the sea?" He stood but kept a wary distance from Arman's cold, damp flesh.
"More or less. Got caught in that downpour."
"Oh, did it rain?" he said vaguely. "Come on, you look cold. Go and dry off and I'll bring your robe."
Kei allowed him to steal a quick kiss before shooing him to the washroom. Arman had to admit the low heat from the stove was welcome – winters in Darshek were mild but on a wet evening, they could be chilly and he was thoroughly soaked. Later he would have a bath, but he liked to do that just before they went to bed and it was too early for that now.
Kei joined him and took on the task of mopping the water from his thick plait – it would take forever to dry and Kei suggested he just unbraid it and tie the whole thing up in a towel, piling it all on top of his head like he did when he bathed.
Finally he was warm and dry, and his fastidious lover would let him hold him close. "You're home early," Kei murmured.
"Well, I got wet," Arman said simply and Kei laughed. "Kevi was less voluble than normal and I finished the inspections sooner than I expected."
"The new gantry's done?"
"Nearly. A week, I think."
"Good. Come and get something hot to drink, I'm sure Pira will make us some tea."
Of course, Arman thought. She'd make tea for Kei. She'd probably dance naked through the streets if Kei asked. But then a lot of people would.
Pira only smiled as Kei led Arman into the kitchen. "Some tea for the poor old frozen man, Pira?"
"Less of the 'old', you brat," Arman grumbled.
Pira only shook her head in amusement. She was a good deal older than either of them and doubtless thought they were both brats. She had water already boiling – which made Arman think she'd been planning to take pity on him anyway – and tea was soon set in front of him, along with two sweet cakes. "One for you, one for him," she said sternly. "Don't spoil your supper."
"Yes, Ma," Kei said, snatching up the cake so eagerly, he looked more like six than thirty-six. "Your cakes are too good, Pira. I can't stop eating them if you put them out."
"Huh, it's more that your stomach is a bottomless pit. Don't steal Arman's or I'll slap your hand."
Arman looked at his lover sternly. "Glad to see someone can keep you under control."
Kei just laid his head on Arman's shoulder. "But you love me anyway."
"Sadly true." He poured out some tea and then sipped it, glad of the warmth both from the drink and Kei's body so close to his. "So what were you working on?" he asked as he slipped an arm around Kei's waist.
"Oh, Jezinke wanted to talk to me about the results of the oivi mould tests and I wanted to get the notes down while they were fresh in my mind."
"Promising?"
"Yes, they are, but the side effects are still a problem. He's going to try some other leaf moulds from the oivi trees, and see which ones he can make into pellets without losing effectiveness." Arman nodded. There had been some great advances in medicine under Kei's directorship of the medical section at the academy, and the sister institution in Urshek had contributed a good deal to the anti-infection drugs that were Kei's main research interest, along with decent pain killers that were less disabling than the ubiquitous pijn. It had actually been a Prijian healer who had discovered that the leaves of the yusus plant were an efficient, minor pain reliever, although he'd had to come to Darshek before he had done so. "Oh, there's letters from Mari and your brother. And I had a chat with Jena. Reji's managed to get himself hurt by being kicked by a beast, can you imagine?"
"How on earth did he do that? I thought he was infallible when it came to those things." Arman sipped more tea and assessed Kei's demeanour. Reji couldn't have been too badly injured if he was this calm.
"Jena isn't sure – he was with Karik at the time. The beast was behaving very oddly and just lashed out. He's got a badly sprained knee and cracked ribs. Feeling sorry for himself, she said. Anyway, it means he's not coming up this time. Risa's going to bring Karik and Gyo to help, and see if he can persuade someone like Lori to come too."
"Karik?" Arman frowned. "Isn't he a little young still? He's no giant, either. Gyo, I can see, the boy's tall. Karik's not."
"He's nearly sixteen – sixteen next month, in fact. As for tall...well, he's got a deft hand with animals, Reji says, and that's the main thing. They don't seem to mind his looks or his stutter, poor lad." Kei looked briefly sad. " Jena and Reji think it will be good for him to see other Prij and the world outside the village."
"He's not a Prij," Arman pointed out curtly.
"You know what I mean, don't get all prickly," Kei said in a soothing voice. "It's a shame Vikis and Kesa moved up here. Karik's got no one to compare himself with. Except you, of course, and you're not his age."
Arman grunted. The subject of Karik always aroused rather confused emotions inside him. Unlike his real parents, Karik was modest and scholarly, which was one of the reasons Kei liked him so much. Arman certainly didn't dislike him, and the boy seemed to have a good heart, but being in his company made him uncomfortable. Karik's stutter – caused, Kei thought, by a severe lack of self-confidence – made talking to him a chore, and although Arman tried his best to ignore the defect, it was just another reason to avoid him. "Are they to stay here?"
"Jena would appreciate it. Would you mind?"
Pira sat down at the table and poured herself some of the tea. "It'd be nice to have some youngsters around here, I say."
"What, younger than me? I thought I was your adopted child, Pira. I'm wounded," Kei said, and laughed at her disgusted expression.
"You already have too many people mothering you," Arman said, tugging Kei's braid. "No, of course I don't mind, and I imagine Jena and Reji would feel happier about that."
"Yes, they would," Kei said, smiling at him in gratitude. "They won't be here for nearly a month. They're bringing the beans – it'll be slow going no matter what wagons they use."
"Fine, then we have a month to arrange things for them," he said, batting Kei's hand as it reached for Arman's cake. "Don't, you tuktuk."
"That's an insult to tuktuks," Pira said, sipping her tea. "Now hurry up and clear off. Dinner will be half an hour and I don't want you in my way."
"Yes, Ma," Kei said cheekily, but he leaned over and kissed her forehead. "You better eat some sweet cakes too, you're so grumpy." He ducked away from her attempts to tug his braid, but forgot Arman had an easier reach. "Ow!'
"Stop teasing her, and come give me my letters," Arman said sternly, but inside, he was smiling. Kei had hardly changed in sixteen years and Arman still adored every teasing, annoying inch of him.
"So what does your brother say?" Kei asked as they lazed in the bath after supper and two more hours of paperwork. The hot water was driving the last chill from Arman's bones and he felt nicely languid and relaxed. Kei's lovely body sitting in his preferred spot on Arman's lap helped, of course.
Arman had meant to pass on the contents of the letters earlier, but they had got onto the subject of the new teachers from Kuprij and Andon who were coming to the academy and whether Lord Meki was finally going to retire this year or not, and he'd forgotten to mention it. "He confirmed the reports we've had – Kita's getting more erratic, apparently, and more extravagant too. Prijus encourages her, of course – no sense in that damn family at all, it seems. The senate are actually starting to voice criticisms aloud – it's even more strident in private, he says – and there have been riots in the market place over the increased taxes. It got pretty ugly, he says. He's talking about moving out of Utuk again – he's worried about the children's safety."
"Can he do that and still be a senator?"
"He can if he doesn't care about having an active political role, and there are certainly things he can do in Garok. My father won't be happy with him, but reading between the lines of what Mari said, I think they might like to leave too."
Kei settled himself in a slightly better position on Arman's lap. "They could come up here."
"Oh, and that would cause a stir, don't you think, an active senator suddenly decamping to Darshian? Besides, Tijus wants the children raised in Kuprij. You can't blame him for that."
"No. But your father and Mari could come up here to live. No one would care about that, surely."
"Probably not, although Tijus would have to listen to the gossip. But Father won't leave his grandchildren, and you can't blame him for that either." Not when his daughter-in-law had finally fallen pregnant after ten barren years, and then produced two children in quick succession. Arman had been pleased too – Tijus had wanted children very badly, and he and his wife deserved their fortune. "But Mari says they might visit again at the end of this year. Father's arthritis hasn't been too painful lately and the winter might be kinder to him here than on Kuplik."
"I'd like to have them here again. Mari is such a nice person. Your father is too, of course," Kei hastily amended.
"I doubt even Mari thinks he's 'nice', Kei," Arman said with some amusement at his stern, gruff father being equated with the sweet and gentle Mari. Still, there was no doubt his father had mellowed considerably in his old age, now he had found a measure of contentment in his life. "But it would be good to see him again. I doubt he'll make many more journeys north."
"No," Kei agreed sadly.
Visiting Utuk wasn't an option either of them had ever suggested. Many of the people who had witnessed his treachery were still in post, including several senior (albeit now very elderly) senators, Lord Blikus and, of course, the sovereign herself, who had never forgiven Arman and made a point of mentioning the fact to his brother as often as possible. Tijus often reported her jibes with his usual benign humour in his letters to Arman, but Arman knew it had made his position difficult.
Kei interrupted his musings by kissing him on the cheek. "Don't be sad, Arman. You'll see him again, I know that. He's still easily able to come. He enjoys sailing – it's not as hard as it might be for someone his age."
"Maybe. It's all right, Kei. You don't need to worry about me. I've got you and that's all I really want."
"Family's important too, Arman, especially when you spent so long thinking you didn't really have one."
Arman stared into Kei's loving, worried eyes. "You're all the family I need, and I mean that. Now, stop talking about them. I want to know what terribly naughty things you plan to do to me tonight."
Kei grinned. "Perhaps I was just planning to go to sleep. I've been teaching most of the day and I'm very tired."
"That would be very naughty indeed, considering what your bottom is doing to my cock."
"My bottom? My bottom is merely sitting where it always sits, Arman."
"Yes, and it always makes my cock want to do things to it, as you perfectly well know, especially when you wriggle like that. If you really are tired, then stop that right now."
Kei pouted and took Arman's earlobe between his teeth, tugging on it gently. "Funny," he breathed. "I don't feel so tired anymore."
"So you are planning naughty things? I was hoping you were."
"Maybe I want to know what naughty things you're planning."
"Me? I'm too old to be naughty, remember?"
"Ah yes. But not too old to have things done to you. When will you be too old for that, do you think? I want to line up my next lover in good time."
Arman clasped Kei firmly to him, and kissed him with authority. "I'll never, ever be too old to have naughty things done to me so long as you're doing them." Then he pinched the backside that was causing him such delicious torment. "But I suspect you'd find a way to arouse a corpse, so age doesn't come into it."
"Oh, yuck, Arman," Kei said, pulling away from him. "Now I think you think I'm perverted."
"No, I just think you're incredibly tempting, especially when you put that pout on." Arman kissed his soft, and, indeed, pouting lips again. "So we've established that I have no naughtiness planned, and that you, despite claiming to be tired, are always planning something. What are you going to do to me tonight?"
Kei's eyes took on a glint which was even more stimulating to Arman's cock than the feel of his bottom. "Come to bed and I'll show you."
Arman grinned. Kei being too tired for sex – that would be the day, truly.
Voyaging - Chapter 2
Even when his father was in good health, the bean harvest was always a busy time for Karik and the other able-bodied men and women in the village. Fortunately, the older men like Fedor and Rin who had lived through dozens of bean harvests, had helped Risa get it all under control.
Karik worked alongside him, glad to be busy – it made it easy to avoid Meran, and when she came to the stables to look for him, he was able to excuse himself to go and help Risa. He wasn't sure if she wanted him to apologise, or to apologise to him – he just didn't want to be caught alone with her again. Having watched other boys of his age begin the mating dance, and seeing how stupidly they behaved just to impress their girlfriends, he'd decided already that he had better things to do.
Meran gave up on him eventually, to his great relief – like him, she was really too busy for this nonsense if she wanted to help her Ma. He had other things on his mind anyway, waiting for his friend to arrive from Ai-Tuek. Every time he saw small dust clouds rising in the distance, he hoped it would be Gyo and his parents, but it was three days before they finally arrived late in the afternoon, leaving themselves very little daylight in which to unload their cart. Karik noted ruefully that Gyo seemed to have grown even taller in the three months since he'd seen him last.
Gyo waved at him enthusiastically, as Risa came up to greet his brother. There were smiles and hugs all around, and then more as Misek's parents and other family turned up to meet them. Misek's wife, Pia, a quiet woman, sat in the cart with their nine-year old daughter, Keira, and waited until most of the boisterousness was over. Keira smiled shyly at Karik, who smiled back. He liked Keira. She never teased him.
"Where's Reji?" Misek asked his brother.
"In his house, all banged up."
"What in hells?"
Gyo only waited to hear Risa's explanation before grabbing Karik's arm and dragging him away from the busily chatting group. "Come on, they've got enough people to help." Karik wasn't sure – he really ought to stay and unload Misek's wagon for him. "It's all right, Ka-chi. I want to see the fire-beetles."
Karik grinned at Gyo's enthusiasm. His friend loved all beetles, especially fire-beetles, which were less common around the herbarium for some reason. Gyo just liked to catch them and watch their tiny lights in his hands before letting them go – he was never cruel or destructive towards them. The winter air was getting frosty as the night drew in. The fire-beetles were one of the few insects to be active all year around, and their tiny shrill buzz was loud in the cold stillness over the waterhole, seeking mates, flashing their red-lit tails as they flew.
"What happened to the beast that kicked Reji?"
"P-Peit shot it – Risa wuh-was still trying to catch it up but Fedor said the thing wuh-was just too c-crazy to help. When Peit wuh...was butchering it, I asked him to crack the s-skull open – there was a lump like this in his b-brain." Karik held up his curled fingers to indicated the inch-wide mass they'd found.
Gyo stopped walked and turned to him. "Really? What was it?"
"There was a wuh-worm inside it. Ma thinks i-it built the gall and that was wuh-what made the beast crazy. I've k-kept it if you w-want to see it. I was going to show uh-uncle Kei."
"I'd like to see it. Reji was lucky if the beast was that crazed. I've never heard of that before."
Karik nodded. "M-me neither."
Gyo was distracted then, suddenly darting forward. "Got it!" Karik crowded close to see the tiny insect. "He's a big one."
"Muh-maybe she."
"No, it has to be a boy – I can see his balls."
Karik laughed and the beetle, as if offended at the joke, flew away. "P-Pa wuh-wants me to g-go to Darshek. "
"I know, my Pa told me when he asked me – that's great, Ka-chi. Are you excited?"
"A l-little."
"It'll be fun. It's better than weeding," he said, pulling a face. "But if Reji's not going, three of us aren't enough, are we?"
"N-no. L-Lori might c-come."
Gyo suddenly snatched another beetle from the air – he was so fast at that, Karik thought enviously. But he was good at all kinds of physical things – tall, strong and graceful. If Gyo hadn't been so sweet-tempered, just like his father, Karik might have had to dislike him out of pure jealousy. But it was impossible to think of anyone disliking Gyo.
They came to the edge of the water hole, where the fire-beetles were really putting on a show. They mated in mid-air, and despite what Gyo had said, it was almost impossible to tell the sexes apart at this time – only when the female was laying eggs could one be sure. Now was the best time of year to see them. Gyo sat down on a log to watch, seemingly entranced. Karik, more used to the sight, was more concerned by the fact the daylight was going, and after just a few minutes, he nudged Gyo. "Wuh-we better go."
"Yes," Gyo said with a sigh, climbing to his feet. "Pa says we'll stay with Kei and Arman. Do you think you're going to ask him about...you know?"
Karik had already given this a lot of thought. "No."
"Oh, come on, Ka-chi! You're nearly sixteen – you need to know."
That might be so, but it didn't mean it was easy to ask the question. All he knew was that Arman had given Karik to his Ma when he was a tiny baby, and his Ma had loved him and looked after him ever since with his Pa. Neither of them knew who his parents were, they'd said, and told him it didn't matter because he was loved, and beautiful, and theirs. And when Karik had asked Kei, he'd said more or less the same thing. Karik had never had the courage to ask Arman. There was something rather forbidding about the man, something that said personal matters were off-limits.
He couldn't help knowing the gossip, hearing the tail ends of speculation by adults who stopped speaking when he came near, forgetting their own children would gleefully pass it on as a way of teasing a stuttering boy who looked so different from them. Some people thought he was Arman's own son. Some said he was the Prijian sovereign's boy that Arman had stolen to get revenge on her. One or two said he must be the child of a mistress, although Karik didn't know exactly what a mistress was.
He didn't look like Arman, he knew that. Karik was short and slight, certainly nothing like his tall father who could lift and toss bales of hay like children threw leather balls in the fields for fun. And Arman had the bluest of blue eyes, almost like the sky they were so blue, while Karik had eyes that were green as new leaves. Gyo had green eyes too, because they said his father was a Prij too. But they weren't as green as Karik's, and Gyo's hair and skin were as dark as any one else in the village.
"You don't kn-know who your fuh-father is, ei-either." Gyo looked away shiftily, and then started to walk along again. "Gyo?"
"Ma told me," he said in a rush.
"And?"
His friend seemed intensely unhappy at what he was about to say. "He...he was some senator, in Kuprij. She was...well, you know your Ma and my Ma were in Utuk?" Karik nodded. It wasn't something his Ma talked about a lot, but it was during the war that she'd met his Pa, and Kei had met Arman. "Anyway, she was...his servant...and...he raped her."
"R-rape?" He didn't know the word.
Gyo looked down at his feet. "Forced her...you know...to sleep with him."
"Oh." Karik was horrified. "I'm s-sorry."
"I wanted to kill him," Gyo said with more anger in his voice than Karik had ever heard before. "To do that to my Ma.... I hate him. Ma says he's dead now. But I wanted to kill him."
Karik thought about telling Gyo such thoughts were wrong, but then if it turned out someone had attacked Karik's Ma, he could bet Pa would want to kill them and Karik would too, probably. "Better to h-have Misek. Go-good man."
"Pa's the best," Gyo said fiercely. "I know people think he looks funny, but I love him and he loves Ma and me. "
Now the big secret was out, Gyo had lost all his cheerfulness, his shoulders slumped and his expression blank. Karik slipped his arm through that of his friend's. "Our fa-fathers are better than any P-Prij. Ah-Arman says so."
Gyo made an effort to smile. "He would know. Anyway, you should ask him."
"M-maybe."
They had reached the edge of the village proper, and Karik could see that Misek's wagon had already been dealt with and taken to the stables. "Oh there you are!" Risa came out of the stores shed, looking annoyed. "Where in hells did you go, Karik? I need you now, you know that."
Karik flushed and opened his mouth to try and make an apology, but Gyo beat him to it. "My fault, uncle Risa – I asked him to come with me. I haven't seen him for months."
Risa pursed his lips. "That's all very well, Gyo, but there's work to be done. You're not going to wander off like this on the trip, are you?"
"No, uncle Risa. I'm sorry."
"Hmmm. Well, at least you'll have your Pa to keep you in line."
"Huh?"
Risa gave him one of his brief, close-mouthed smiles. "Mis has decided he's going to take Reji's place. He's worked with him before, it's a good arrangement."
In an instant, Gyo's good mood was restored. "Great! Where is he?"
"At Ma's. Go wash up, Gyo, your grandma will have supper out soon. Karik, you better head home too."
"Yes, Ri-isa."
Gyo touched Karik's shoulder. "I'll see you tomorrow, early, Ka-chi. Oh, this is going to be fun!" he yelled over his shoulder as he sped off.
Risa shook his head at his nephew's exuberance. "Off you go, Karik. Let Reji know, will you? I'll speak to him tomorrow but I know he won't have a problem with it."
Karik nodded and walked further on down the street to his parents' house. Gyo was lucky. Karik wasn't really looking forward to the journey as much as he would have done if Pa had been going – Risa was nice, but it wasn't the same.
His Ma was cooking and his father was lying on his makeshift bed, holding his ribs. "Oh, there you are," he said. "I heard Misek had arrived but then no one came near us."
"Perhaps they've got better things to do than dance attendance on your lordship," Ma said tartly, but Pa only grinned. "How's Gyo?"
"G-good. Mi...Misek is going to c-come with us."
"Oh?" Pa said, trying to sit up and wincing as he failed. Karik went to him and shoved another pillow behind him so he could straighten more easily. "Thanks, son. How can Misek leave the herbarium for two months?"
Karik just shrugged. It had been cooked up between the two brothers, and presumably Pia had agreed. "D-don't know."
"Pia's managed before, you know. And she's got her brother and her father to call on," Ma pointed out as she stirred the pot.
"Yes, but spring's their busy time. I'll have a word with Risa...."
Ma turned and wagged her wooden spoon at Pa. "No, you won't. You said Risa was in charge, so leave it be. Gods, Reji, you've known Misek twenty-six years – have you ever known him make a stupid decision? I've known him sixteen and damned if I can remember him doing so."
"True. All right. He's got the experience which Lori hasn't, so it makes me a little easier. I think it will help Risa too, what do you think, Karik?"
Karik was a little startled by the question, since he thought he wasn't really part of the discussion any more. "Y-yes." He realised that sounded rather weedy. "It's a g-good idea."
"There you go," his mother said firmly. "Karik, set the table, please. Reji, can you manage to sit with us, or shall I bring you a tray?"
"Let me try the table – my arse is turning to rock lying in bed all day."
She hooted with laughter. "This is the man whose idea of fun is to do just that."
"Just because I want to spend all day in bed," Pa retorted, "doesn't mean I want to keep still."
Pa got through supper sitting normally, although it was clearly a trial for him. When he declared he wanted to sleep in his own bed with his own lover that night, Ma made a protest for the look of it, and then agreed, although she insisted he would have to use a chamber pot if he needed to relieve himself in the night. "Anything, I can't sleep on that chair, it's harder than stone," he declared with feeling. "As soon as I'm mended, I'm going to ask Noki to help me make a new one. If any of us get sick in the future, we'll need it."
Ma kissed his cheek. "You're only thinking of your own old age, which is a little closer than it is for the rest of us," she teased.
Pa slapped her rump. "Now come on, you old hag, you're only two years younger than me. Maybe I better just move our bed down here and Karik can bring us our soup while we drool on the pillows."
"Karik will be married and too busy to feed you anything by then," his mother said. "Won't you, Ka-chi?"
Personally, Karik thought that was unlikely, but he smiled anyway. "I mi-might stop by."
"So kind, son of mine," Pa said, pulling a face at him. "I knew there was a reason we kept you around."
It was just a joke, but Karik couldn't stop the slow burn in his face, or the emotions the words caused. Ma gave him a sharp look and then turned to Pa. "Reji, are you ready for me to give you a wash?"
"I can wash myself, Jena," he said impatiently. "I've only sprained my knee, not broken it in two."
She folded her arms. "Fine. Be an independent arse and when Karik and I have to come and pick you up off the floor, you'll only have yourself to blame."
Pa got to his feet with the help of the chair back and his stick. "Oh, be quiet, you harridan, you're enjoying this far too much."
Ma just rolled her eyes at him. "Come on, Karik, we'll clear up while your Pa proves what a man he is."
Karik's parents were the only adults in the village who spoke to each other like this and he sometimes wondered if they were quite right in the head. He began to clear the plates to take to the sink to scrub, while Ma put the bread away in the bread bin and the other food into the larder. He knew she was listening out for Pa, but since his father was being so pig-headed, he also knew she wasn't going to go in there unless he yelled.
She startled him by laying a hand on the back of his neck. What's bothering you, Ka-chi?
He turned to look at her – all he could see in her expression was kind concern. Ma, when you were in Utuk.... Her expression changed immediately, becoming wary. Did you know what happened to Pia?
She relaxed immediately, but he wasn't sure why. Gyo's said something or been told something?
He said...he said his Ma was raped. It was such an ugly word, he thought, but then it was a damn ugly thing.
Oh. Come and sit, dear, so we can talk about it.
Karik nodded as she led him over to his Pa's now abandoned bed. He's upset, Ma. Really angry at the man who hurt her.
I don't blame him. We were all very angry about that – she wasn't the only one, but for her sake and the others, we don't talk about it, and you aren't to, either. It's not fair on Pia. And Gyo is Misek's son in everything but blood, just as you are mine, Ka-chi. She kissed his forehead in blessing and Karik couldn't help but be warmed by the tender gesture.
He said the man was dead. Is that true?
Yes, dear. Her mouth tightened as she added, He died five years ago, and good riddance to him.
You knew who he was?
We know who they all were, she said bitterly. And most of them are dead or forgotten.
What about the people who had you? Are they dead too?
She picked at a speck of dirt on his shirt before answering. Yes, but the man I was with was different, Karik. Karus was a very kind, gentle man, who died before we were rescued. Don't tarnish his good name with the sins of the others.
The name was too similar for coincidence.Karus...?
Yes, you were named for him. He was a good person, Karik.
Ma, if you know all this stuff, why haven't you told me about it?
She took her hand off his arm. "We uh... Karik, it's very complicated, and some of it isn't my right to tell."
"Ah-Arman kn-knows who my p-parents are."
She touched him again. Ka-chi, I think it's time you had a talk to Arman when you get to Darshek. But you have to understand that adults have secrets too, and pain, and sometimes they want to hide things, not because they don't trust you, but they don't trust themselves.
I just want to know who my father is.
Your father is Reji, my son. I am your mother. Whoever planted his seed on whatever woman, doesn't alter that, do you understand?
She almost looked afraid as she said this, for all the fierce tone in her voice. I know, Ma. I'm your son. I just want to know who gave birth to me.
She relaxed again. That's perfectly natural, Karik. Hopefully one day, it won't matter any more whether your hair is blond or brown, or what the colour of your eyes is. You'll know that you're just Karik, our beloved son. She tugged his braid affectionately. But you have to reach that conclusion on your own. I just ask you to be respectful of Arman. He gave up a lot to leave Utuk, and you'll remind him of that. Karik nodded. She smiled and kissed his forehead again, then straightened up and put a wry grin on her face. "Do you think your Pa's fallen over yet?"
Should I go and look?
Why not? I doubt it'll hurt his pride any more to have you see him like that than me.
Karik got up to see if Pa needed help. He would have liked to have spent more time talking to his Ma about what she'd said, but she was clearly uncomfortable with the topic. When he got to Darshek, he would have to ask uncle Kei about it.
The subjects of fathers didn't come up again with Gyo, although his friend was happy to spend all his spare time with him. They worked together on the bean loads and with Gyo's strength, the task was done in less than half the time, leaving the two of them plenty of time to talk and to explore.
Gyo was really getting sick of working in the herbarium, he said, however much he adored his Pa. He wanted to be a carpenter, or even a wainwright. "But there's no room for another apprentice in Ai-Tuek," he said gloomily. "I'd even work as a trader. I think I'd really like that. Wish Pa was a trader like Reji, instead of a gardener."
"I d-don't wuh-want to be a trader," Karik confessed. "I w-want to be a h-healer."
Gyo looked at him. "Still? It's a lot of study, Ka-chi. What about your...?" He pointed at his mouth. "Might make it hard to do that."
Karik nodded, knowing it was unfortunately true that his stammer would make being a healer very difficult. Knowledge was only part of it, his Ma was always telling him that. A lot was reassuring the patient, getting information and giving instructions. When he sometimes found it hard to get even the simplest sentence out clearly, he knew that this side of the job would probably be beyond him. "M-maybe I c-could work with d-deaf people."
Gyo laughed and clapped him on the shoulder. "Maybe you could. You're smart, Karik. Smarter than me. I could never be a healer, but I don't want to be one, so that's good. I'll race you over to the mine head, all right?"
Not fair, Karik complained to himself as he struggled with the twin disadvantage of surprise and shorter legs. It was about half a mile to the spoil heap which marked where Banji and Rin and their people were working the new shaft. As Karik jogged up, Gyo was already standing talking to his uncle and grandfather, who waved politely at Karik as he pulled up, out of breath. "You b-bastard," he muttered at his friend who only grinned. "Huh-hello, Rin, B-Banji."
Banji's shy ten-year-old son, Keiji, smiled at Karik as his father greeted him. "Hello, Karik. Come to see if you might like to be a miner too? You're short enough. When he grows up, young Keiji-ki can keep you company."
Karik refrained from scowling at the jibe from Banji. Just because he was short didn't mean he wanted to spend his days living like a worm. Rin ignored both of them and continued what he was saying to Gyo, something about starting a new shaft sooner than they expected. Karik muttered a polite rejection of Banji's suggestion before wandering off to where Gyo's aunt was hauling ore buckets up on a winch. Pijli was easily as strong as him. All of the mining family were very fit and the men were stronger even than Karik's Pa on his best day.
"How are you, Karik? Are you glad to see Gyo again? And are you excited about going to Darshek?"
He answered her questions with a single "yes", since he didn't feel like separating how he felt about the journey from his pleasure at seeing Gyo. "Wuh-where's Nev?"
"Down below, giving Banji a rest."
Karik nodded as he helped her switch buckets, and carried the full one over to the waiting cart. He waited until the bucket was lowered again before asking, "P-Pijli, d-do you rem-member the war?"
She looked at him in surprise. "Of course I do, Karik. I was nearly your age. That was a bad time," she said, scowling.
"Wuh-what happened?"
Another look of surprise. "Hasn't Jena told you about it?" He shook his head and she pursed her lips. "She was one of the hostages the Prij took to Utuk. The rest of us either went to Darshek for safety, or stayed in the village with the soldiers. Banji and I went north, Mis and Risa stayed here."
"Wuh-why Risa?"
"Because he was too young for the Prij to want. Mis thought they wouldn't take him because of his eye. But they took Kei and Peit and Urki...."
"Kei?" Now Karik was completely confused. He'd never heard that Kei had been one of the hostages before. He'd have thought someone would have mentioned it.
"You really don't know much, do you?" she said, cocking her head quizzically. "Why haven't you asked your Ma, Karik?"
"Sh-she d-duh-doesn't ll-like to talk about it."
"I'm not surprised. Look, Karik, it's not a secret, but I don't want to go behind her back."
Karik could have yelled with frustration. "Sh-she said I wuh-was too young be-before."
"You're still...." But then she looked at him. "No, you're not really a child any more. I forget that, just because you're small for your age. I'm so used to the giants in the village," she joked, gesturing toward Gyo.
"Kei," Karik insisted. Somehow he felt his uncle was the key to unlock this whole mystery.
She sighed. "Kei was one of the hostages that the Prij took. That happened while I was in the camp in Darshek. The next time I saw him, he was with some Darshianese soldiers and Arman was their prisoner being...."
Karik started with shock. "Wuh-what?"
"Don't you even know that? Karik, Arman was a general in the Prij army. He was the one who took our people away."
"No! H-he rescued...." Karik stopped. All he really knew was that people talked about Arman rescuing the hostages and then he'd come to live in the village, before he and Kei had moved to Darshek. He knew Arman was a Prij, but he hadn't known he was a soldier. "I d-don't understand."
She laid a hand on his shoulder. "Ka-chi, I really think you should talk to Jena and Reji about this. I don't want to say the wrong thing. "
Gyo had finished talking to his grandfather and now strolled over, greeting his aunt casually. "Are you going to go down the shaft after all, Karik?"
Karik frowned at him and then turned back to Gyo's aunt. "P-Pijli, please...."
"No, Karik, it's Jena's place to tell you more about this."
"More about what, aunty Pij?"
"Never you mind. Now, go on, you pair. Some of us are working."
Gyo made a noise of protest but Karik began to walk away, feeling cross and frustrated at all the secrecy. If it wasn't a secret, then why wouldn't people tell him anything? "Hey, Karik, slow down!" Gyo caught him up and slung an arm around his shoulders. "What's biting your tail, Ka-chi?"
Karik shook him off. "S-sick of b-being tuh-reated like a kid."
"By aunty Pij? What did she say?"
Kairk walked on until he was sure they were out of earshot of Rin's family. "D-did your Muh-Ma tell you ab-bout the war? About the h-hostages?"
"Some. She doesn't like to talk about it much. Why are you asking now? You never wanted to know before."
"I d-didn't know it wuh-was important. Wuh-what do you kn-know about Arman?"
Gyo stopped walking and stared at him. "Arman? I know the same as you do. What's he got to do with anything all of a sudden?"
"Th-that's what I wuh-want to know." He kept on walking. Now his curiosity was so thoroughly aroused, he had to find out the answers to his many questions.
"Do you want me to go away?"
He turned to his friend, who was looking puzzled and not a little hurt at Karik being so abrupt. He forgot sometimes that Gyo wasn't as old as he looked – he was a year younger than Karik for all he was so tall. "No, we can b-both ask."
He linked arms with Gyo and tugged him along. He hoped his Ma was in a talkative mood.
But she wasn't there. His Pa was, though, mending a bridle at the table. "Oh, hello, boys, I thought we wouldn't see you until supper. Karik, you couldn't make some tea, could you?"
He nodded and filled the kettle from the cistern tap, poking the low fire into life in the belly of the stove. When he turned around, Gyo was sitting at the table, watching Pa work. "That last load all stowed away?"
"Yes, Pa. P-Pa, c-can I ask a question?"
"Of course, son, you don't need my permission."
"Wuh-was Arman a s-soldier?"
Pa laid the leatherwork down. "Arman? Why are you asking about him?" Karik just kept looking at his father until he sighed and gave in. "Well, yes he was. A general, in fact. But that was before you were born, Karik. He's not in the military at all now. He refused to let the Rulers make him a colonel – they even offered to make him a general in our army but he wouldn't have it."
Gyo was bug-eyed with surprise. "Arman? A general?"
"D-did he t-take people away? Ma? And Kei?"
Karik's father didn't look happy at his question. "Who been telling you things, Karik?"
"I think it was aunty Pijli, Reji," Gyo said helpfully, rather to Karik's annoyance. "What did she say Arman did, Karik?"
Karik started to answer, but Pa held up his hand. "You know, this is ancient history, and painful to a lot of people, Karik. I'm not sure talking about it helps anyone."
Karik nodded. "Yes. B-but I wuh-want to know, Pa."
His father sighed heavily again. "All right. There's not a lot to it, actually. Arman was one of the generals who brought the Prij troops to our territory when they invaded all those years ago. Kei was one of the hostages they took from here and Karik's Ma was taken from Ai-Rutej."
"Ma said they were all forced to be servants," Gyo said, scowling.
"Yes, they were," Pa agreed. "When the hostages got to Utuk, they were all placed in houses of the rich to work. Some were unlucky like your Ma," he said to Gyo gently, "and they were treated badly. Kei was placed with Arman, Jena with Arman's friend. Jena was well-treated, she told you that, I know." Karik nodded.
"Kei wasn't treated kindly, but that wasn't Arman's fault, and he put a stop to it when he found out. That was how they became friends, actually. Anyway, a few months later, Arman was sent north again to find out what was going on here – what was happening was that our soldiers had taken back our land," he noted with a slightly wolfish smile. "He took Kei with him. There was a battle when the Prij troops crossed Tirko Pass, and Arman was captured and injured. Kei came with the soldiers bringing him north to Darshek. Somewhere along the line they fell in love and Arman agreed to help get our people home. Which he did, and he's lived in Darshian ever since. I met him when Kei brought him to Darshek, and I went with them when we went to rescue Jena and Pia and the others. It was really something to see." He grinned. "We really scared the shit out of those damn Prij."
Karik had a feeling the brief narrative had covered all the facts but that there were still important things left out. "S-so, no big secret?"
His Pa shook his head. "Not really, son, but it just was a painful time for a lot of us, losing friends, worrying about them – and some people never came home," he added, his smile slipping, "so we don't like to talk about it. Kei had a bad time of it in Utuk, and Arman had...well, he had his own sorrows. He did things he regretted and I think he's been trying to make up for it ever since."
"Did he kill people?" Gyo asked, eyes big with curiosity. The water boiled just then and Karik turned to sort out the tea, but he was listening avidly for his father's answer.
"Yes, he did," Pa said in a low voice. "But he's not like that any more. Karik, what I've told you today is for you, not for anyone else to hear. It's not your story to tell, do you understand?"
"Yes, Pa. B-but wuh-where did he f-find me?" It made no sense, carrying a baby around during a war. There wasn't an answer – he turned and found his father looking at him sadly.
"Karik, you have to ask him that."
"I j-just wuh-want to know who my p-parents are. Wuh-where I c-came from."
Pa's hand, which had been resting loosely on the leather straps, tightened a little, almost as if he was angry, although his expression was just a little sad. "I know, son, but there's more to being a father than just getting a woman pregnant."
"That's right, Ka-chi," Gyo said angrily. "Even if that pissing bastard who hurt Ma was alive, I wouldn't want him to be my Pa."
"Language, Gyo," Pa said, but only with slight reproof. "But that's exactly my point."
If Pa knew so much about all this, he had to know the rest of it. Karik pinned his father with a fierce look. "You kn-know who my real f-father is, d-don't you?"
"Yes, I do." Pa looked regretful, as he added, "But I can't tell you, Karik. If Arman wants to, then he can."
His words were like being slapped in the face. Shocked and angry, Karik slammed the tea pot down on the table. "You said you d-didn't know!" he yelled. "You lied, Pa!"
He stormed out, Gyo's and his father's pleas to return ringing in his ears, and then with angry tears blinding his eyes, he ran up the street and out of the village towards the fields. It was bad enough they hadn't even bothered to tell him things that everyone else in the village seemed to know. But to lie about something he'd asked directly about, and more than once – Pa, who never lied to anyone – how could he trust him any more?
People looked at him curiously as he bolted along the street, past the houses and workshops, past the fields with the spring crop of urko beans just beginning to appear above the soil. There was a large stand of trees near the edge of one of the farms which he liked to climb so he could look at the baby birds, but this time he wanted to use it to escape. He scrambled up a favourite tree and found his usual perch in the crook of a large branch, then hugged his knees to his chest. He was ashamed at being so upset, but he felt so betrayed. To think that Gyo's Ma trusted him with the name of his father even with the kind of man he'd turned out to be, but Karik apparently wasn't mature enough in their eyes to know who his real parents were. What was the big deal anyway?
He hadn't been this angry in years, not since the worst bullying had been firmly stopped by Fedor and the clan elders speaking sternly to all the children in the village. Embarrassing as that had been, it meant Karik hadn't suffered quite as much as he had done before, and then the others had grown up a little and found other things to amuse them. But Pa lying to him was far worse than anything the children had done to him, even when they had tried to cut his hair or to dye it brown, or when Peit's son had held him down that time and scrubbed dirt and mud all over his skin to make it less pale. That was just stupidity. What Pa had done....
He rubbed his eyes furiously. He was sick of this. It was all very well for his Pa and Ma to say he was their son, but he wasn't really, and every single person who looked at him knew it. At least with Gyo, people didn't even notice he had very slightly wavy hair and green eyes until they were talking to him for a while, and Kei said there were some naturally green-eyed Darshianese, so it didn't mean Gyo had to have a foreign father. But Karik was as different in looks from the other villagers as trees were from merkos.
He sat staring into space for a long time, and finally realised that the rising cloud of dust he'd been looking at without really seeing for several minutes meant another farmer was arriving with more damn beans. He really should get down and help the others, but he was feeling rebellious and resentful and couldn't see why he should help a bunch of people who looked down on him because of his height and his stammer and his colour, and who'd lied to him and treated him as if he was feeble-minded, just because he couldn't speak as clearly as they could. Karik began to seriously wonder how easy it would be to just run away – somehow get to Urshek or even Utuk where Prij were common, and he would just be another face in the crowd....
"Karik?"
He looked down. His Ma was calling, looking up into the trees. She couldn't see him yet, but she must know he was there. "Wuh-what?" Great – even when he was being rude, he had to stammer.
"Are you all right, son?"
He wasn't going to answer. He felt like yelling that of course he felt just fine after learning that his father had lied to him, that both his parents had. But all he said was, "No."
"I thought not. Ka-chi, I'm too old to climb up. Won't you come down?"
He could refuse, but he was already feeling a bit foolish. He was going to be told off, but he'd suffered worse from people.
He climbed down slowly, and then stood at the base of the tree, looking at his feet. He really couldn't face her disappointment. "Karik, do you want to talk?"
He shook his head. "S-sorry I yelled."
"No, dear, we're the ones who should apologise."
He lifted his head. Instead of the annoyance he expected to see, he found his Ma looking rather worried and a little sad. "Wuh-what?"
She took his arm and he let her lead him over to a raised root where she sat down and indicated he should too. She kept hold of his hand. Your Pa told me what happened. Gyo's upset.
I'm sorry, I just got...Ma, why did you lie to me? You know who my parents are, why can't you tell me?
Dear, it's not for me to say. Or your Pa. We agreed this years and years ago with Arman that he would be the one to tell you.
But you lied! You could have said....
What, Ka-chi? You were eight the first time you asked. Would you have understood the idea of waiting for a few years?
You don't trust me.
No, Karik. We just made a solemn promise to a dear friend, that's all.
That just made him angry again. He's more important to you than me.
"Oh, Ka-chi," she said, putting her arm around him. "That's just not true. Reji and I would give our lives for you. We wouldn't do that for Arman. But we thought this was best. I'm sorry it's hurt you, and I'm sorry we had to lie to you. We were trying to protect you and Arman."
She urged him to lay his head on her shoulder, then began to stroke his hair carefully. It's partly because we're afraid, son. You're the most precious thing in our lives and we don't want to lose you, have you run off because you think these mythical parents might be better than us. It's a silly thing, I know, and you have to do what's best for you, but.... We love you so much, Karik. Neither of us ever expected to be able to raise a child and though it was hard in the early days, you were such a joy to us. You still are.
I wouldn't leave you, Ma! I promise I won't. He looked up and saw there were tears in her eyes, one even slipping down her cheek as he watched. He'd only seen her crying a couple of times in his life and both times had been when a patient of hers had died. "D-don't cry, Ma. I wuh-won't leave."
"Thank you, Ka-chi. You're such a good boy." She wiped her eyes and sniffed hard. "Why don't you come back to the house? Reji's talking to Gyo and Misek. We can tell you more about the war, not that there's a lot to tell. We weren't really hiding it from you, it's just we all put it behind us. Arman's not proud of how he was then, although he's a bit too hard on himself, I think."
Was he a bad man, Ma? Did he hurt you or Kei?
No, he didn't hurt us, and he's not a bad man, not at all. But he was a soldier and he was fighting our people. He just wanted a fresh start when he came back with Kei. You know he loves Kei, don't you? Karik nodded. People made gentle fun of his uncle even to his face about the fact he and Arman were still so affectionate after all their years together, and one never really seemed completely happy unless the other was there. Well, there you go. Kei's a good man, so if he loves Arman, Arman must be good too, don't you think?
I guess so. Ma, will Arman tell me the truth when I ask him?
I don't honestly know, dear. Like I said last night, he might just find it all too painful to talk about. She looked at him earnestly. "Can you accept not knowing?"
I'd try to accept it. I'll try to understand, Ma, I really will.
"Thank you, dear." She stood up. "Come back now. Your father's not angry, I promise you. He's just worried about you. It'll be all right, wait and see."
She held his hand as they walked back to the village, just as she had when he was smaller, but he got the feeling this time it was for her comfort, not his. He hadn't realised his parents might be afraid he would leave them. He only wanted to know who his original father and mother were, but if they hadn't wanted him sixteen years ago, he didn't want to just leave his home and live with strangers. "I l-love you, Ma," he said quietly as they walked.
"And I love you, my darling son," she said, her hand tightening around his, and her eyes full of tenderness that made him feel warm and happy just to see. "You've been a blessing on our lives since we first took you in."
Now a lot calmer, if feeling rather stupid for being such a baby about things, Karik followed his Ma back into their house. His father held out his arm as he saw Karik, and as Karik came to him, he was pulled into a careful hug on his Pa's good side. "I'm sorry, son. We should have explained things better. I didn't want to lie to you."
"It's al-all right, Pa. M...Ma exp-plained." Gyo was sitting close by his father, and gave Karik a rather shaky looking smile. "S-sorry, Gyo." His friend, for all his huge size, was actually a sensitive soul who hated strife and arguments. Karik should have remembered that.
"We understand, lad," Misek said kindly. "You boys are in an awkward situation, we all know that." He ruffled the back of his son's head. "Not boys. Young men."
"Fine young men," Karik's Pa agreed. "Jena, let's have some tea. Karik, sit by me."
The agitation in Karik's heart died a silent death as the three adults talked over mugs of tea, Pa's hand resting lightly on Karik's shoulder, and Ma on his other side. Even though Pa must have known there were more harvest loads coming in, he made no attempt to call the conversation to a halt and send Karik to help his partner. Instead, he and Misek described events that had happened sixteen years before, how the word had come of the Prij invasion and how Fedor had had the painful task of telling some of his people to leave for their own safety, and of having to let his own adopted son be taken away, possibly never to be seen again.
"You can imagine how he felt when Kei waltzed back in with Arman the first time, let alone the second," Misek said, chuckling slightly. "My Ma nearly had a stroke – she was terrified of the soldiers, and didn't want any of us to have anything to do with Arman when he was here as a prisoner. When Pa heard that Kei had actually got Arman invited to Myka's wedding...."
Karik's father grinned. "You know, I only heard about it after the fact and I still couldn't believe the size of his balls for trying it. He claimed it was Myka's fault, but you know it had to be Kei."
"I know it was," Misek agreed. "And then of course, then Kei had to top that by bringing him back as a lover and calmly announcing that Arman was going to live here or Kei would just leave. If it hadn't been Kei, I don't think he'd have got away with it. But then we got to know Arman, and he really did his best to fit in."
"Yes, I have to give him that," Pa said. "Anything anyone asked him to do, he did it, and he never argued back if someone was rude to him. It just took the steam out of them when he did that, of course."
"He had plenty of practice arguing with me," Ma said, setting the freshened pot of tea down, and a plate of small cakes for their guests. "I really hated him for a while, but it's hard to hate someone trying so hard to make up for his sins."
"Kei makes the difference," Misek said. "I know he won Ma over, and Fedor. People in Ai-Tuek couldn't believe that our healer fell in love with a Prij though. That was all they wanted to talk about when I moved there. But it never comes up now. Funny that, when you think about it," he mused, sipping his tea.
"People have moved on," Karik's Ma said. "Pia and I think about it more than you would, but we have our own reasons."
Karik looked at his mother's sad expression. "M-Ma, if no one h-hurt you, wuh-why is it hard to t-talk about it?"
She stroked his arm gently. "I never said no one hurt me, son. Only that Karus didn't. There was a lot of cruelty around at that time. Not all of it was from the Prij, either." She exchanged a look with Pa, who took her hand.
Karik didn't want to hurt her by pushing. He was just glad that the secrecy was over and even though he had to wait until he got to Darshek to ask the really burning question, at least he now had his parents' blessing to ask it.
Now the three adults had begun to reminisce, it seemed like a dam had been unblocked, and they talked for hours about their shared past. In fact, they were so long at it that Risa came looking for Karik, and grumbled when he found not one but three potential labourers sitting on their backsides, drinking tea. "All right for some," he muttered, but accepted a cup of tea anyway. "Mis, Ma is nearly ready to set supper."
"Well, I suppose we'd better be going. It's not like we won't have plenty of time to talk on the trail. Jena, I need to send a message to Ai-Tuek to let Pia's brother know what's happening. Can I do that now?"
"Of course," Ma said, moving to his side and taking his arm.
Passing the message to the other village's mind-speaker took only a matter of minutes, and then Misek told Gyo they had to go. "I'll see you tomorrow, Ka-chi," Gyo said, looking a lot happier than when Karik had returned to the house.
Karik waved goodbye to him, and then his mother set Reji and him to shelling beans and cleaning root vegetables while she fetched some dried meat from their cool store. "Do you really forgive me, Karik?" Pa asked in a low voice as Jena left the room.
"Y-yes. I'm sorry I yelled."
"It's all right. I think in your position I'd have yelled a bit too." Karik smiled a little. "You know, son, for your sake, I wish I looked more like Arman. But I never wished you looked more like me." He took Karik's wrist in his hand. "If I could have chosen a son specially, I'd still want him to be just like you."
" Pa, I wuh-won't ever leave you or M-Ma."
"Well, you might one day, son. We both hope you'll get married or at least find a lover the way Kei did. You might move from the village for that, or find work somewhere else, and we'd understand. Just so long as you don't leave us here," he said, tapping Karik's forehead.
"I won't. I p-promise."
His Pa smiled and tugged his braid gently. "That's definitely the best thing I've heard all day. Now, we better hurry up or your Ma will tear the hide off me for distracting you."
Voyaging - Chapter 3
There were days when Arman felt every bit of his forty-one years, and today was one of them. It was a day which made him yearn for when he was younger and could spend weeks under canvas, out of cities, away from bureaucrats and politicians. He didn't miss the soldiering as such – but he missed the sense of being his own master. The fact that, strictly speaking, he was his own master, since he worked purely on a voluntary basis, didn't really alter the sense of being harried by petty annoyances that were likely to wear him to a bloody stump through their sheer volume.
When he was stressed, he had two ways of dealing with it – solitary exercise, or finding Kei and letting his lover take the reins. It was too late in the afternoon to go for much of a walk, and too cold on this damp, cloudy day for a swim in the harbour, so he settled for going to the academy to see if he could cajole Kei into leaving early. However, he was out of luck, being told that Kei had left early – but that he had gone to the House of the Gifted.
So Arman had a choice of walking a half mile to their house, or half a mile to the House of the Gifted and then a mile home. Easy choice really, when he knew who was waiting for him.
"Arman!"
He was smiling before he turned. "Hello, Meda."
He took her hand and bent so she could kiss her cheek. "I hoped you might drop over this week," she said.
"Oh? Any reason?"
"No, just missing you both. Kei's here, but I suppose you know that."
"Yes, I heard. Where is he?"
"In the indoor garden. Come on," she said, taking him along by the hand.
The 'indoor garden' as they liked to call it, was really more of a greenhouse that had been built inside a large atrium on the south wing. It housed plants from all over Darshian, Andon, and now Kuprij, and was one of the most elegant and well-constructed edifices in Darshek. Glass and metal chimes tinkled softly as small birds – not pets, but ones who had just made their home in this inviting space – hopped among the leaves and branches of the thickly clustered plants. Clever metal tracery decorated door and window edges, and the floor was inlaid with perfect, detailed mosaics. At its heart was a clear area with cushions and chairs, where many of the residents loved to spend bright mornings, or cold, dull days when the trapped heat of what little sun there had been made it a warm and welcoming place. In the summer, the windows were thrown open to the garden, but now, they provided shelter against the renewing drizzle softly spattering the glass. A few fire sprites hung in the air, relieving the gloom.
Arman felt tension slipping out of him just smelling the scents of the hanging blossoms, some of which reminded him of happier times with Karus in his garden, and in that of his parents when his mother had still been alive.
Of course, the thing that really lifted his mood was the smile on Kei's face. "Oh, hello, Arman. I didn't expect you to come all the way here." Kei held out his hand and tugged him down onto the seat. "You look more like you have a headache," he said, laying his hand on the back of Arman's neck. After all these years, it produced an automatic response, and he just lowered his head for the expected and welcome neck rub. "Are they all being tiresome again?"
"Very. Very, very, very. It's days like this when I really miss Lady Jilki. She'd have stopped this nonsense in five minutes."
"We all miss Jil," Meda said quietly. "I know Nera does, a lot."
"Yes, I know." The death of the formidable Ruler from a stroke two months before at the relatively young age of sixty, had been felt very keenly by friends and colleagues alike. Since her death, Arman had never been busier, or more appreciative of just how much the woman had done for her country. The Rulers, and those who served them as Arman did, were struggling to fill a very large hole. "Anyway, I think we might have made a breakthrough, but I said that last week, so I don't want to be too hopeful." Kei's warm hand on his skin was bliss. He needed this – this touch, this warmth. It fed a never fully satisfied hunger in him and gave him peace.
In that, he wasn't so different from the three Gifted lounging in front of him. Meda had been drawn down to the cushions with her two lovers, and Reis was petting her, stroking her stomach, while her cheek rested against Neris' neck. "Where's Jera?"
"Oh, he and Wyma are talking to Seiki," Reis said. "She's feeling sad – she misses her mother."
"Poor child," Kei said. "You'll like her, Arman, she's so sweet. I wonder if it goes with being a mind-speaker, you know. If it were me, hearing everyone's thoughts and keeping their secrets would make me horribly bad-tempered."
Arman gave him a gentle poke. "Then it's as well you're not one, because a bad-tempered Kei is a dreadful sight." Meda grinned at him for that.
Reis spoke up. "Arman, why don't you and Kei stay for supper? The weather is so dull."
He looked at Kei. "That's kind, Reis, but Pira is expecting us, and I don't like to leave her on her own without warning."
"Arman's right." Kei said. "It wouldn't be kind to not turn up this late in the day. But how about we come to you tomorrow – or you could come to us?"
"Oh, come to us," Meda said eagerly. "I know Wyma would like that, and you can help cheer Seiki up, Arman."
"Me? I'm more likely to depress her, Meda."
She only laughed. "Oh, Arman, you're so funny sometimes."
Arman shook his head. Meda seemed to see him as a far more genial and amusing person than Arman felt himself to be. "Are you working on anything now?"
"Yes, I started on Wyma's portrait just today. Want to see?"
Arman did, very much, and although her companions grumbled at being disturbed, they followed her uncomplainingly up to the first floor where she shared a large studio with several other of the Gifted who also painted or sculpted. Wyma's portrait was little more than a sketch, but already she had caught the kind, slightly otherworldly look of the venerable soul-toucher's eyes. At eighty, Wyma was the patriarch of this odd little clan, easily the oldest one of them all. Several portraits of him at different ages hung around the House, and although one might think this could be the last because of his great age, it was not inconceivable he might live a few years more. One of the many oddities about the Gifted was their longevity and general good health. The oldest had lived to be ninety five, an incredible age for Arman to contemplate. Even though Wyma was now frail, he was still very sharp, and reminded Arman not a little of Karus.
Wyma's was not the only portrait. A half-completed one of Lady Jilki stood on an easel to one side, a posthumous tribute to a much loved friend and supporter. There were others in progress as well.
"Oh, when did you persuade him to sit still enough for this?" Kei said, wandering over to where the sharp features of Lord Meki had been roughly laid out on a gesso-covered board.
Meda smiled. "I didn't – you must be joking. I had to get Neka's help to give me the images from other people's minds. He'd be cross if he saw it. He doesn't want any fuss made."
"I can understand that," Arman said thoughtfully. "But, gods, the man has served almost longer than any other Ruler in over a hundred years – that has to mean something."
"That's why he won't retire," Kei said with a chuckle. "He wants to break the record."
"I think it's that he just doesn't know how to stop," Arman said.
Reis sighed, touching the picture. "I thought when his great granddaughter was born, he might. But he doesn't seem to be interested in spending time with children."
A view with which Arman had some sympathy, preferring as his elderly patron did, to spend time with people who could actually talk intelligently to him. But as he thought of how the Ruler's life had lost almost all meaning when his soul-mate died, he shivered, wondering if he could ever survive without Kei if the worst happened.
Kei, of course, noticed his sadness and moved quietly to his side, putting his arm around him. "Shall we go?" he murmured. "Being late is almost as rude as not turning up at all."
"Yes, of course. Meda, I can't wait to see the pictures finished. I can tell already they will be worthy of their subjects."
She smiled shyly at that – honest praise of her art always seemed to reduce her to tongue-tied pleasure. She gestured for him to lean down so she could kiss his cheek. "I'll make you a copy of Meki's," she whispered. "Our secret."
"I'd like that."
Kei, who'd been close enough to hear the exchange, squeezed Arman a little around the waist. "Come on, we'll need to borrow a lamp as it is."
"Do you want to borrow our carriage too, Arman?" Neris asked. "Or maybe Reis...."
"No, thank you," Arman said hastily. "I'd like the walk. Kei?"
Kei nodded. "We'll see you tomorrow, then."
They were waved goodbye and made their own way out of the house. The drizzle had stopped, and there was a little light coming from the houses and the watch stations every few hundred yards, but they were really dependent on the oil lamp Kei was holding on a pole above and in front of them. The streets were emptying, people going back to their homes for supper, one or two carriages drawn by jesigs clipping along the rain slicked streets to the houses of their owners. Arman was glad they hadn't accepted the invitation to dinner. He wasn't feeling in a companionable mood, although Pira and Kei would place no demands on his short temper, he knew that.
"Meki came to see me today," Kei said as they walked along.
"Oh?" Arman was surprised. Kei was always a little wary of the Ruler, although Lord Meki was unfailingly complimentary about Kei and it was in no small part due to his patronage that Kei was the senior master of medical studies at the academy. That Kei was not the senior master of the academy itself was simply because Kei did not wish to be. The post was his for the taking – it had been held by a succession of temporary officers for years. But Kei didn't want that level of responsibility, and also still wanted to be as much a hands-on healer as he could. Arman thought the decision was right for his lover, and agreed with it. Lord Meki didn't. "Pestering you about the position again?"
"No, not this time. He was pestering me though."
Arman glanced at his lover, and was surprised to see his sensual lips pressed into an uncharacteristically annoyed line. "Want me to ask him to back off?"
"No. I want you to explain why you didn't tell me you'd been offered the position of Ruler."
Ah. "Well, because I had no intention of accepting, that's why. I didn't want to discuss something with you which was never going to happen. I thought it would only annoy you."
Kei stopped and turned to him. "Arman," he said gently. "You can discuss anything with me. Don't hide things from me, I don't like it. Apart from anything else, Meki thought your refusal was because of my objection, and it was rather embarrassing to have to admit I knew absolutely nothing about it."
"I'm sorry, Kei, truly. I'll tell him – but I honestly don't know why he's bothering you at all when they've already put Jiv in place."
Kei began to walk on. "Can't you guess, Arman? He actually wants to retire. He's having heart problems, though I shouldn't tell you that as it's confidential. But he won't go willingly until the person he wants is in post. That's you."
"I can't, Kei. For all kinds of reasons, only some of which are to do with you."
Kei sighed. "This is what you have me for, you great nitwit. You could just tell me about this stuff. Look, you've been his right hand man for fifteen years. Everyone knows you're able and well-suited. So why not?"
"Because I don't deserve it, because I'm a Prij, because it might cause a stink in Utuk, and because I don't see enough of you as it is, damn it. Kei, we only came here in the first place more or less because Meki bullied me into it. I won't let him do that again. We do enough, we both do."
"Hmmm." Kei walked on a little further in silence, but Arman could tell he was only marshalling his forces, not abandoning the field. "The 'don't deserve' is utter rubbish, you know. You've given this country fifteen years of loyal, voluntary service, and you brought peace even before that."
"Whatever I've done, Kei, can never be enough. Your country brought me you. I could never repay Darshian for that."
Kei glanced at him and gave him a sweet smile. "You're such a romantic, Arman. Loopy as a crazed thurl, but romantic. All right, then the fact you're a Prij. Except you're not and haven't been for sixteen years. So that's a nonsense of an argument."
"You know perfectly well that for a lot of people, especially those in the dry region, I'm a Prij and will be to the day I die. A fancy bit of paper makes no difference. And a lot of people still remember me from the war."
"My love, I remember you from the war. So what? You threatened to cut Seya's throat and she's one of your firmest supporters and a good friend. I think you think it matters more than it does."
"Tell that to Karik, then. The boy doesn't even speak Prijian, had a braid as long as anyone's, and yet his childhood companions still insult him. If he is tormented for the colour of his skin, how much more will I be distrusted when my skin covers my much darker crimes?"
Kei made a rude noise of derision. "I think Meki rates your intelligence too highly sometimes. All right – Utuk. Who gives a damn what that crazy bitch thinks? Kuprij needs us a lot more than we need her. Besides, did it occur to you that Meki thinks it might actually strengthen bonds between our countries?
"Yes, of course, because appointing an infamous traitor to the highest office in the land is a perfect way to curry favour with a vain, stupid woman who still hates my guts. Sometimes I think I rate your intelligence too highly."
Kei stuck his tongue out at him, which made Arman smile because Kei looked about five years old when he did things like that. "Kita won't live forever, and there's a lot of Darshianese in Kuprij now, a lot of Prij here. Things have moved on from the war."
"Not enough. Anyway, what about the fact I would never see you? Or doesn't that matter to you?"
Kei suddenly gave Arman the lamp pole to hold, and while he was still startled by the abrupt action, Kei took advantage of his confusion to seize him firmly and kiss him breathless, certainly not something Arman was going to complain about – although he had to remember not to drop the lamp. When he was done, Kei pushed him back firmly. "Any more idiotic questions?"
Arman grinned. "No." He offered Kei the lamp pole but Kei indicated with an impatient flick of his hand that Arman could damn well carry it now. "But the fact remains that the job really needs more time than I'm prepared to sacrifice away from you. There's a reason Meki lives in the House, you know."
"So we live in the House, that solves that problem."
"Kei, no. You've got your library and your garden, there's Pira – what about inviting our friends over? Do you imagine Vikis and Kesa will enjoy eating in the Rulers' House? I can't see it."
"Arman, it's very simple. Some of the week we stay at the Rulers' House, some of it at ours. And when we're at ours, we make a rule that we don't do Ruler business. You know Nera arranges things that way."
"Meki is a lot more active than Nera is. We don't have children or other ties. That's one of the reasons the damn man exploits me so much."
Kei still looked serene. "All I'm saying is that your objections can be worked through. All you have to do is decide whether you want the job or not, same as me with the academy job. I didn't want it, so the rest was easy."
"Well, I don't want this, so it's also easy."
Kei turned to him. "Are you sure?" he asked quietly, slipping his arm around Arman's shoulder.
"Yes. For now. Kei, Meki's not going to retire while Jiv is still newly in place, heart trouble or no – he's already told me that, and I trust his word. Let me think about it more, but it won't be an issue for a few months, and in that time, I intend to do all I can to find a candidate that he, or at least the other Rulers and the rest of the country will accept. They'll have to accept someone else if I won't do it, and I still believe, for all the reasons you have so firmly rejected, I'm the wrong person for the job. Although," he said with a smile, making Kei stop walking and tilting his head for a kiss, "there's something very tempting about you having to call me 'my lord' again."
Kei grinned against Arman's mouth. "You're forgetting how disrespectful I am, Arman. Besides, I'll only call you 'my lord' if you call me 'Master'."
"You've been my master for all these years and you know it, brat." Just then, there came a fresh spatter of rain. "Come on, Pira will be wondering where we've got to."
Pira was indeed wondering, and scolded them a little for their tardiness, but Arman could tell she was pleased they had turned up. He wasn't surprised. They were always careful not to leave her isolated or ignored for any time at all, if they could help it.
The day before, she had come down with a cold, and her symptoms had worsened since this morning. Seeing her flushed, fever-bright eyes and hearing her wheezing, which sounded alarming even to Arman, Kei insisted on dosing her with uyris flower tea and getting her to bed early, bringing her supper on a tray and generally fussing, which probably did Pira more good than any medicine. It left Arman and Kei alone to get their own meal in the kitchen, a good hearty bean soup with some of Pira's best bread. "I think we should cancel dinner with Reis and the others, and I'm going to work from here tomorrow," Kei said. "If you could tell them – I don't like the sound of her cough."
"Of course. If you have to go in the next day, I'll arrange to stay." That won him a brilliant smile. "What, I can't care about her too?"
"No, I was just remembering how good you are with sick people, however rotten a patient you make."
Arman mock-scowled at him. "Cheeky creature."
Of course Kei was unmoved by his reprimand and only grinned back at him. "Oh, I forgot to mention that Jena spoke to me just before you got to the House."
"Oh? A problem with Reji?"
"No, with Karik. Arman, he's pretty determined to get some answers now."
"Ah." The boy was nearly sixteen, Arman supposed it was only natural.
Kei sat back in his chair to look at him. "You've had all this time to think of a response, and 'ah' is the best you can come up with?"
"It's better than the truth, that's for sure. Kei, Karik won't be happier for knowing who his parents really are and you know it."
"Yes. But he doesn't, Arman. It didn't help that Gyo learned the truth about his father and told Karik. The poor boy is imagining the worst, Jena says. The gossip in the village has been pretty lurid from time to time and she's sure he's heard more of it than he lets on. So what are you going to say to him? They've told him to ask you this time."
"Have they now? That's helpful."
Kei gave him a wry look. "Oh come on, that's really not fair. It's not like they could ever have concealed the fact he's adopted even if they wanted to. And everyone knows you brought him there. They kept their promise to let it be you to tell him, Arman. Now you have to."
"And what if he decides to run off and join that disgusting pair?"
Kei laid his hand over Arman's and looked him straight in the eye. "If you decide for good, defensible reasons that you can't tell him, then I'll support that and so will they. But to deny Karik the truth because you don't trust him.... Well, I think that's unjust. If he's that flighty, he might just run off to Utuk and look for answers anyway, and who knows what would happen to him if he did? My knowledge of Karik tells me he's unlikely to do that. He's a very loving, thoughtful boy. Arman – he is not his father, or Mayl. He's very much Reji and Jena's child. Apart from his looks, I can see nothing of the others in him at all, nor sense it."
"Well, I need to think about it. We still have weeks before they get here. I'm not sure I approve of Jena wasting Neka's time to pass on such trivial personal messages. Neka has a lot to do without that."
"Oh, don't be an old curmudgeon, Arman," Kei said, sounding irritated. "Jena and Neka are friends and this isn't trivial. Karik's happiness is as important as yours or mine or theirs. I'd have thought you'd have appreciated the warning."
"I do, I'm sorry. It's just that Neka has been doing so much for us lately...."
"Yes, because she's a friend of ours too. Arman, you can't make her do anything she doesn't want to. Jera would just throw anyone who tried into the ocean. Now stop being grumpy and fetch me some more soup."
Arman raised an eyebrow at the lordly tone even as he got up to refill their bowls. "Oh, yes, sir, your highness, Master Kei."
"You know you're making fun of someone who can make your life a living hell if I get the dosages right, don't you?"
Karik spent as much time as he could with his parents until the time came to leave. Pa didn't question his sudden clinginess at all, and it seemed to Karik that his Ma and Pa were unusually unwilling to let him – or each other – out of their company for very long. It almost made him wish he was small enough to sleep in their bed again for those three nights.
Since Pa was housebound and Ma still had her patients to care for, Pa took on what chores of hers and any cooking he could manage, which wasn't much. Karik usually did quite a lot of the cooking, but since he was doing Pa's job, Pa had offered to take on the burden. He wasn't a great cook, he freely acknowledged that, but Ma wasn't a lot better. Karik cooked better than either of them, because he'd spent more time watching Meis and Sira preparing meals. Karik didn't mind that food was rather indifferent if his parents made it – if all he wanted was good cooking, he would go to Gyo's grandmother's house, or Myka's, or Sira's.
Somehow meals were just more fun at home, with Pa teasing Ma and being chided for his naughtiness, or Ma talking to Karik gravely about the latest thing that Karik had discovered, the secret places the lizards laid their eggs, seeing moths emerge from their cocoons, or how he had watched thurls attack and take down a snake hundreds of times their own size and weight. Several times he'd told his mother about plants even she hadn't heard of, and she had asked him to show them to her, whereupon she'd carefully collected the seeds and dried the plants to send to Kei in Darshek. She'd told him many times to never give up looking at things that everyone else said were well-known or unimportant. "It's what people think they see, that they miss," she'd told him more than once.
So this last night before travelling, as he helped Pa prepare the meal, he wasn't that surprised when his mother came back from visiting Fedor and, setting her basket aside, gave Karik a small parcel. "It's a notebook and a supply of pencils," she said. "For you to keep a diary if you want, or to make notes, or draw pictures of what you see. I want to know all about it, Ka-chi, everything. I want to know what you see." She kissed his forehead. "If anyone can see something new on that trail, it'll be you."
"Damn right," Pa agreed. "You've the sharpest eye in Ai-Albon. Maybe even in Darshian, son."
Karik flushed with pleasure. Ma revealed the rest of what was in her basket. "Sira's made you a new coat – that one you've been wearing is getting terribly ragged. She's going to mend it and give it to Keiji. Try this one on."
He wiped his hands and let her slide it on his shoulders. It was made of urs beast and jombeker wool, jombeker leather on the shoulders and at the elbows, and lined with good, sturdy cloth. It was a man's coat, no doubt about it. His Pa and Risa each had one like it – loose fitting, waterproof and durable, it was perfect for anyone having to work hard in all weathers. There was room for him to grow into it but it still fitted well.
"Oh yes, very good," she said with approval, as she made Karik turn so she could see the fit. "If only I sewed better than I do, I'd have made it myself. How does it feel?"
"Ni-nice. Thank you."
She hugged him. "Well, thank Sira, really. You're all packed, I hope. I've got a medical kit for each of you, and you've read Kei's guide before, and watched me...."
"Jena, love, Karik will be fine," Reji said, touching her face and making her look at him. "The worst that will happen is that he might die of boredom, but he's got two experienced men with him, and you and Gyo are such sensible lads. When I think how little thought I put into it the first time I went off on my own, it's a wonder a carcho didn't take me the first night I camped out."
"Oh, gods, carchos...."
Pa slipped his arm around Ma. "Jena, stop it. I've never had anything attack me in all this time. Fully grown beasts are too much work for them unless they're desperate, and the hunting's been good this season, Peit says. Karik and the others will sleep in the wagons if there's any risk. Bean sacks make damn fine beds, you know," he added, winking at Karik.
"I d-don't muh-mind bed r-rolls."
"No, but if there's a bean sack handy, take it. Risa certainly will, he knows all the tricks now."
Ma took the pot into which Pa and Karik had been putting vegetables and beans over to the stove, and added some oil and a little water before putting the lid on to let the food steam. It would take half an hour or so to cook. Karik started to clean up the table, but his Ma took the cloth from him. "You sit and talk to your father, Ka-chi. You're going to be working hard over the next few weeks. Enjoy the rest while you can."
Surprised and touched, Karik took his seat again. "Nervous about going?" his Pa asked.
"No, just wuh-wish you were c-coming."
"I wish I was too, but you like Misek, don't you?" Karik nodded. "Then it's all right. The first trip's the hard one – after that it's easier."
Karik didn't know what to say to that, and could only look down at the wooden table top. He heard Ma speak. "Maybe Karik doesn't want to be a trader, Reji."
Pa didn't answer, but when Karik dared glance up at him, he found his father looking at him kindly. "I wasn't making any assumptions, son. With your brain, it would be a terrible waste."
"B-but you're smuh-smart too, Pa."
"Not like you, Karik. I'd love you to work with me, nothing would be better – but only if it was what you really wanted. Otherwise, just think of it as a way to see new things, and maybe you and your Ma can come with me from time to time up to Darshek."
"G-Gyo wants to b-be a trader."
His father seemed surprised. "Does he now? Maybe when you two get back, I'll have a word with him and his Pa. I'm sure Mis thinks the same as me, that he wants his boy to do what makes him happy."
Karik's spirits rose – not only did he not have to pretend he was interested in a trade in which he had none, he might have just handed his best friend his wish. "Thanks, Pa."
Pa ruffled his hair. "So now you know I've not got your future mapped out, you can just relax and enjoy this. You're doing me a huge favour, you know. When you get back, I'll catch you a dozen merkos, if you want."
"Merkos?" Ma said, one eyebrow raised. "Not in here again, certainly not a dozen."
"N-not a dozen, Ma." After all, the biggest litter he'd ever seen had been six babies.
"Glad to hear it. They give a nasty bite, Ka-chi, I've never understood why you're so fascinated with keeping them. You be careful. You too, Reji. You're more likely to get bitten than Karik is, you're such a great oaf."
Pa looked highly offended. "You're taking advantage of my wounded state, woman. Wait until I'm mended, I'll spank you black and blue."
"And then I'll just dose your food with tirsel leaf, you idiot," she said, rapping Pa's head with a wooden spoon, but allowing him to steal a kiss as well. "Karik, there's something else we wanted to give you."
"Huh?"
"Close your mouth, son, it makes you look stupid," his Pa teased. "You're going to be away for your birthday, although with any luck Kei and Arman will be with you to make it a good day, but we wanted to give you our gift now. I'm afraid it's nothing very special. Jena?"
"Let me get it."
Karik was wild with curiosity. Usually his birthdays were marked by something practical – a new knife one year, a book several times, or a belt that his Pa had cut and tanned himself. But with Pa laid up and his Ma so busy all the time, he couldn't think what they might have prepared – his father had already given him new gloves the week before, so it couldn't be that. Pa was just looking at him with an affectionate smile, giving nothing away.
His Ma was back from the office in moments. "Put out your hand, Ka-chi."
He did so, and into it was dropped a small polished stone on a string – no, not a string. He held it up – the cord was made of plaited strands of hair, dark and light. He looked at his mother questioningly. "That's all of us in that, my son. Your hair, your Pa's, mine. Because we're a family, all of us. Stronger together than apart."
He stared at the smooth, slim cord, made of such fragile stuff, but braided and rebraided, it was as strong as any leather would be. "Thank you," he whispered as they each put an arm around him, hugging him close. In that moment, he couldn't have given a damn who had given birth to him. His Ma was the only mother he ever wanted.
Thank you, Karik. I hope I never give you any reason to think otherwise.
He nodded, finding it hard to imagine she ever could. "Wuh-what's the s-stone?" It was dark, not quite black and shaped like a large teardrop. It was smooth as glass to the touch – nothing like it was to be found near Ai-Albon.
Pa held it up to the lamp light, and now Karik could see there were veins of colour in the dark brown, almost black stone – reds, purples, even a hint of green. "Comes from the Kislik Range. They mine these for jewellery, sell a lot of them to Andon – they call them tero stones. This isn't a valuable one, there's too much stone, not enough colour. I found it last time I went through, and thought of you, so I asked Rin to help me cut it down and polish it. I don't know why it's so prettily coloured – I thought maybe you could find out the answer for me." He lifted the pendant up and put it around Karik's neck. "There. Do you like it?"
"I l-love it. It's b-beautiful." It was the finest thing anyone had ever given him, and he placed his hand over it protectively. "C-can I wuh-wear it all the time?"
"I'm sure you can," Ma said, smiling. "The stone is tough, and the hair string has a core of thread to stop it unravelling."
"G-good, thuh-then I'll wuh-wear it always. Ee-even when I s-sleep."
She laughed and patted his cheek. "You do that, Ka-chi. Then if anyone ever asks who are your parents, you point at that and say, there they are. Your parents, our son."
"Yes," Karik said, agreeing completely. He wished he wasn't leaving. He would be counting the days until he could come home again.
He slept better than he thought he would, but when he stumbled down the stairs in the predawn, both his parents were up. They looked as if they hadn't got much sleep and Karik would have done anything to make them less worried. It was just too late to back out now. His Ma was making hot cakes, and his Pa poured him a glass of milk. "Now, you need to eat properly on the trail, son, even if you're too tired to feel hungry. You'll get fresh vegetables in the villages, make sure you eat those. If you get an injury, make sure you tell Risa and the same if you get sick. Better to know early than end up with a nasty surprise. Don't take on more than you can handle, tell Risa or Misek if you don't think you can do something – there's no room for heroics with loads this size, you understand?"
"Yes, Pa. I'll be c-careful."
"I know, son. I'm more concerned about Gyo than you."
Ma set some hot cakes down in front of them. "Stop fussing, Reji, you're just making him worried. Misek and Risa know what they're doing, and they'll hook up with the other travellers too."
"Yes, I know. Eat up now, Karik. You won't get hotcakes like this for a week at least, and even then it depends on who billets you in Ai-Beyto."
Karik nodded, spreading butter on his cakes and adding some honey. He noticed Pa didn't have much of an appetite. He really hoped they'd be all right without him.
He finished the cakes his mother gave him, and she tried to press him to eat some more, but he knew he'd only get stomachache if he did. He thanked her politely, knowing she was trying to show her love for him with her cooking, and wishing there was something he could do for her in return. He put his hand over the stone pendant, hidden carefully under his shirt, and smiled a little – he would only have to look at it, to remember how much they loved him.
At last, Pa got slowly to his feet. "All right, son. Give your Ma a kiss and let's be off. Risa won't want to waste any time."
Karik obeyed – Ma hugged him fiercely as if she wasn't going to let him go at all. But all she said was, "You enjoy yourself, Karik. It's a big adventure with your best friend. And give my love to Kei and Arman – tell them to treat you right or I'll be after them."
"Yes, Ma," Karik agreed solemnly – as if he would ever say such a thing to either man. But she knew that and wasn't serious. "I love you," he whispered into her ear.
"I know, Ka-chi. Now off you go."
He could see tears in her eyes again. He gave her one last hug and then picked up his packs, stacked neatly in the corner.
One of his father's fire sprites lit the way up the street, where Karik could see the small lights of lamps up at the stables. Misek's family had turned out in force to see them off – his wife and daughter, Pijli and Nev, Banji and Myka and their two children, and the head of the family, Rin and his wife Meis. Meran gave Karik an uncertain smile and he grinned back to show there were no hard feelings. His Pa had told him he'd had that little talk with Meran, diplomatically suggesting that Karik would prefer to just be friends with her. She'd taken it well, so Pa had reported, to Karik's relief.
Risa finally came over to them. "Everything all set, Risa-ki?"
"Everything's fine, Reji. Hello, Karik – that's a fine coat, you'll need that for sure," he said, shivering a little in the dawn chill. "Got your gloves and scarf and waterproof? Can't go back for things, you know that."
"Y-yes. M-Ma gave you the m-medical kits?"
"Yes, they're all stowed and so's the bedding. All I need is my crew," he said, grinning at Misek and Gyo who were being hugged by Pia and Keira. "Reji, I'm still going with two by two on this. I figured it was less boring for the boys and easier on the beasts."
"It's up to you, Risa," Pa said peaceably. "You know the job. Two by two is fine until you get to the range, unless you get really foul weather. You look after my boy, you hear?"
"Yes, I will. I'm glad to have you along, Karik. You looking forward to it?"
"Y-yes," Karik lied, putting a smile on his face.
"Good," Risa said, clapping his shoulder, obviously happy to believe what he wanted to hear. "Right, men, let's mount up. Reji, I'll send messages back, there's no need to worry about Karik."
"I'm more worried about you, brat," Pa said. He pulled a small pouch out of his coat. "Now that's just a little spending money for Darshek, Karik. Ask Kei about the best way to use it – there's not enough to get into trouble with, I hope."
Karik accepted the small leather sack with surprise. He'd seen coins a few times but had never used them. "Th-thank you, Pa, but I d-don't n-need it."
His father just ruffled his hair. "Of course you do, son. You want to buy a pastry while you go sight-seeing, you need money. It's not like in the village. Now, on you get. Like your Ma said, you enjoy yourself."
Karik gave him a careful hug, then threw his pack into the back of the wagon where Risa was stowing their belongings. He climbed up into the driving seat on the passenger side – he knew Risa would handle the driving, at least for the first few hours.
Misek and Gyo were likewise mounting up on their own wagon. Risa cracked his whip and yelled to get his lead animals moving, and with roars from the beasts and the creaking groans of the heavily laden wagons, they started to move off at a slow walking pace. Karik turned to wave at his Pa, who was smiling cheerfully – but he knew it was forced. Still, he had to play his part too to make things easier for his father, and there was no point in making him worried. He put an equally bright smile on his own face. "Bye, Pa!"
"Good luck, son!"
He kept looking a little longer, acknowledging the waves from Meran and Keira, but all he really wanted to see was Pa's face.
"I hate this bit," Risa said quietly as the wagons rumbled on, the dawn sky gradually brightening into gorgeous pink and gold to their right. "The goodbyes. I miss them every time. It's the worst part of this job. Reji's the same – says it breaks his heart every time to leave you and your Ma behind. I think he'll give it up soon. A man can only do this job for so long before you can't bear leaving home any more. Reji's done it for twenty-six years. That's a long time. Too long."
"Oh." Karik hadn't known that. If it was true, then he was glad, because he hated his Pa being away for months, and so did his Ma. His father had often talked about them joining him, but until now, it had only been on short trips to Ai-Beyto or to Ai-Tuek. Ironic that the moment he had finally got his wish, he himself hadn't been able to go.
"Anyway, at least this trip I've got the three of you. We'll have a great time, Karik. It's not the most interesting time of year from the plant side of things, but I like travelling in the cold. It's easier on the beasts too, so long as we don't get too much rain."
He was being unusually chatty and Karik figured Risa was trying to put him at his ease. It was all right – he liked Risa, and under the sometimes stern exterior, he had a perfectly good sense of humour. It wasn't his fault that Karik was already missing his parents.
Voyaging - Chapter 4
Given his apprehension, Karik was surprised how enjoyable the trip was turning out to be. Risa quickly turned over driving duties to him to give him the experience of handling such a heavy load. "Mis and me will have to keep watch at night, Karik," he explained as they rode, Misek and Gyo a little way behind so they didn't have to eat their dust. "You lads will have to do the driving while we sleep in the wagons. Think you can manage that?"
"Y-yes." Karik had done a lot of beast handling and driving, although never of a wagon this heavy before, or one joined in tandem with another. After a day or two he was already used to it, learning the way the wagon moved, and the beasts responded. It was tiring – but Karik was used to hard work. Already he was learning a lot about beast behaviour and the care of the animals pulling such heavy loads over long distances. He wondered if anyone had ever bothered to collect all the information about urs beasts in a single book. One could write a book just about the problems that the beasts had with their feet.
The road was good – it had been a personal project of Arman's, Risa said, both to improve wagon and cart design, and to institute a programme of road improvement along Prijian lines. Travelling in the deep wet season was now possible, where it had not been before, and amazingly, a fast cart and good beasts could now make the entire journey from Darshek to Urshek in just under four weeks. Karik could tell that even if Risa didn't admire Arman for his general good qualities, he would be a personal hero for this achievement alone.
The scenery was dull a lot of the time, although not as much as he feared – there was always just enough variety in the landscape, a sandstone outcrop, stands of trees, new crops, small herds of wild jombekers and here and there, the flash of activity that meant hisks were seeking cover. At each waterhole, he made a note of all the different tracks he found, even discovered the large markings of carcho feet a couple of times, although they never saw any, somewhat to his disappointment. Birds were everywhere, chasing mates, beginning to build nests for the upcoming breeding season, preying on small mammals – and occasionally on each other. There wasn't much time to write up his journal – he tried to do that for a half hour each night, working by lamplight – but he was able to press leaves, feathers, and bits of dry snake skin into it, and collect unusual stones, each of which reminded him clearly of where they had been when he'd collected it.
He never rode with Gyo during the day, but he shared a bedroll and the shelter of the wagon with him at night – and there was always the evening campfire, easily his favourite time of the day. By then, they were all tired and needing food, rest and to stretch, but they were never too tired to talk. The older men had the more exhausting role of course, since they insisted on taking the night time watch. Even taking naps during the day in the backs of the wagon didn't make up for it, but Misek and Risa claimed they didn't mind, and that they would catch up a little when they stopped in the villages. Sleeping on the bean sacks was, as his father had promised, surprisingly comfortable, and sharing them with Gyo let them talk as they were not able to do during the day.
Gyo was enjoying himself. Having his father's undivided attention on this trip was obviously a real treat, and if Karik felt a little jealous of that, the fact he himself was being treated as such a necessary and valued part of the team was doing his own confidence a world of good. For the first time in his life, he was being treated as an adult with adult responsibilities by people other than his parents, and he liked it, liked it a lot. It also pleased him that Risa really did seem to enjoy his company, and listened to his views with solemn interest. Karik's stutter sometimes hardly made an appearance when he talked to the older man as they drove.
It was thus something of a shock when they reached Ai-Beyto to find himself abruptly placed back in the role of a child, and a useless passenger – not by Risa and Misek, but by the people who greeted them, and who were to host them for the night. At least they didn't comment on his colouring, since most of them had seen him before on his previous visits. But it was galling that Gyo was deferred to as an equal member of the driving team simply because of his height, and Karik, who'd become used to being Risa's right hand man, was ordered about and called 'boy' as if he was six, not sixteen. His stammer came back worse than ever, and even the comfortable beds didn't make up for the humiliation. Karik could see Risa understood his feelings, but there wasn't anything that could be done except to just be on their way as soon as they could the following morning.
As they left, they were joined by two men bringing two wagons from the village. The same thing happened at Ai-Kislik, except it sent four men and wagons with them. It made sense to share effort if possible, and the bean harvest was a particularly difficult time for traders. It made things easier for everyone, because there were more people to share the watch, more people to lend a hand when they damaged a wheel – it was fixed and replaced within two hours, hardly longer than their midday break.
It meant more people around the fires at night, and more stories to hear, and Karik sat quietly and listened, happy to let other people carry the load of conversation. Karik's presence was cause for curious comment, and that led onto some discussions of the Prij and their habits which Karik found both fascinating and slightly horrifying.
That was all harmless enough, but it didn't stay that way. On the day they had passed the ruins of the old Prij fort and the graveyard that held hundreds of dead soldiers, the war was a natural topic to mull over as mugs of tea were sipped after the evening meal. It turned out that one of the drivers from Ai-Kislik, Edi, was a former hostage – but all the men remembered the war and the hostage taking in surprising clarity. When Edi learned that both Gyo and Karik's mothers had also been hostages, he was keen to talk about his experiences. Karik noticed that Misek and Risa hardly encouraged him, but to outright forbid the topic would have caused an argument which trail fellows couldn't afford. Unfortunately, Edi didn't seem to take the subtle hints to shut up, nor did his companions from his village.
The experience of Ai-Beyto and Ai-Kislik had been similar to that which Karik's father and Misek had described. The more northern villages had had the most warning to get their people out safely, but it hadn't lessened anxieties, and they had had the longest to wait for the advancing Prij army. "Of course, we'd heard about Ai-Darbin by then so none of us were going to put up a fight," Edi said, sipping his tea, his companions nodding.
"Wuh-what happened at Ai...Ai-D-Darbin?"
"That boy was killed by General Arman. I thought everyone knew about that," Edi said, glancing at Misek. Karik didn't miss the older man's frown, and if Edi had been more perceptive, he would have known to leave this alone. But he didn't. "Young fellow, about your age in fact, threw a mining explosive at the army, killed some soldiers. He was executed there and then by that Prijian bastard, right in front of the whole clan – in front of his Ma and Pa, so I heard. No one was going to fight back after that."
Karik stared at Edi in shock. It was one thing to know Arman had killed as a soldier – quite another to know he'd killed a young boy in cold blood.
Gyo cut across his thoughts. "Were many other people killed?"
"You know, that was the funny thing about that war. We had the big battle here at Ai-Kislik and a lot of Prij died then, and then a few more further south – but apart from that boy, the ten hostages who were murdered were the only other Darshianese who died apart from the soldiers at Ai-Kislik and Fort Treyk."
"Muh-murdered?"
"Karik, I'm not sure this is something your parents would want you to be listening to...." Misek said, but Edi cut him off.
"And why in hells not, Misek? If it was good enough for me and the rest of us to have to go through all that, and for those people from Ai-Vinri to die, why shouldn't the boy hear about it? It was his people who did it, after all."
Karik flushed to the roots of his hair and would have walked off if it wouldn't have been seen as a childish reaction. He just sat there staring at the fire and avoiding all eye contact as Risa stood up and glared at Edi. "He's not a Prij. Karik is as Darshianese as you or me, Edi. Don't blame him for his parents or his looks, and you've no right at all to blame him for anything to do with the war."
"Edi, I'd really appreciate it if you wouldn't raise this in front of the lads," Misek said in a calmer tone.
"Oh, so it's all right for me and the others to be hauled off to Utuk to save your lousy hides, and to be beaten and attacked and starved, be forced to watch ten people executed like curs, but you don't want to soil your precious boy's ears with it?" Edi was on his feet now, his temper roused. "You were sitting on your arse all nice and safe in Ai-Albon, and we nearly died – what gives you the right to tell me what to do or say? You think because you've got a Prij with you, that makes you something grand? When it was his people that raped that boy's Ma, made her watch her friends take swords through the heart?"
Risa went to throw a punch at Edi, but Misek grabbed him from behind, and fortunately, Edi's friends had more sense than he did, restraining him from responding physically. Gyo made a distressed noise as he scrambled up and ran off into the dark. "Gyo!" Misek yelled as he struggled with his brother. "Karik, go after him!"
But Karik was already on his feet and running after his friend. "Gyo! Stop!"
His friend hadn't run far – it was simply too dark to do that – and had come to rest by a tree near where the beasts were tethered. Karik found him pounding furiously at a tree, hitting it over and over again with clenched fists. Karik dragged him away from the tree into a hug. "Don't, Gyo, it's all r-right."
"Why, Karik?" Gyo yelled. Why did all that happen to Ma?"
"I don't kn-know, Gyo."
Nothing Karik said to him seemed to help, and so it was with relief that he felt a hand on his shoulder, and turned to find Misek there with a lamp. He handed the light to Karik and then took his son into his arms. Karik stepped back, feeling somewhat in need of his Ma and a hug too, but trying not to show how angry and upset he was because there was enough of that going around already.
"Karik." He turned again and found Risa there, his mouth turned down in a grim line. "I'm sorry, lad. What he said – that was cruel and wrong."
Karik moved away from Misek who was trying to talk to his son – Gyo was still yelling in a muffled way against his father's shoulder. Risa followed, and put his hand on Karik's shoulder. "Was it t-true? The muh-murders?"
"Yes, so far as I know from what Kei and Jena have ever said. But just because he went through that doesn't give him the right to blame you or slander you. You weren't even born when all that happened."
"But M-Ma? She s-saw?"
Suddenly the idea of his mother being forced to watch something so horrible was more than he could stand, and even though he tried to hold them back, tears started to spill down his cheeks faster than he could scrub them away. Risa pulled him into a hug, and Karik hid his face on his sympathetic shoulder.
"Karik, I know it's upsetting, and by the gods, Edi needs a kick in the arse, but it was more than sixteen years ago. People have healed, moved on. I know – I was there too. It's harder for the hostages, but not all of them have held onto their anger. Your Ma hasn't, Pia hasn't – Kei hasn't, I know that."
"Ah-Arman was a m-murderer?"
Risa stepped back a little, but kept a hand on his shoulder. "Karik, your father explained that. He was a soldier. From what I heard, there were circumstances in Ai-Darbin that Arman can tell you better than me. Arman has never lied to me or anyone I know. Ask him. But don't judge until you do. Don't borrow Edi's grudge."
Karik nodded, rubbing his eyes. That was only fair. At that moment, Misek and Gyo parted, and came over to them. Misek's hand resting protectively on his son's back. "G-Gyo? Yuh-you all ri-right?"
His friend gave him a shaky smile. "I'm all right, Ka-chi. I just...." He brushed his arm against his eyes. "Just to kill people like that.... It's awful," he whispered.
"Yes, it is, son," Misek said gently. "Listen, those bastards can organise the watch tonight. I'll share the wagon with Gyo – I want to be with my boy. Risa, you look after Karik."
"Sure, Mis."
Misek went back to speak to the other traders. Karik was glad he wouldn't have to talk to them again that night. "R-Risa? C-can wuh-we share with M- Misek too?"
"I can't see why not, if there's room. Gyo?"
"Please, uncle Risa, I'd like that."
It took a little rearranging, and it was a bit of a squash, but there was an undeniable amount of comfort from lying close to Gyo and the others that night. Karik felt Gyo shaking. "G-Gyo?"
Nothing for a moment, then Gyo fumbled about and then blew his nose. "I miss Ma and Keira," he whispered back, sounding blocked up.
"I kn-know." All Karik could do was to comfort his friend, and hope the whole situation looked less overwrought in the morning.
Of course it did. It had to, since they had to spend at least four more days with the men from the other two villages unless they wanted to make a dramatic gesture, and Risa needed to keep on good terms with these people since he would see them all the time in his job. Edi apologised rather clumsily to Karik for any offence given, and Karik accepted it, even though he knew that in his heart Edi still considered him a Prij and partly to blame for what had happened to him and his friends. Misek kept Gyo away from the others, and Risa hovered protectively around Karik, but it wasn't really necessary. What Risa didn't realise was that Karik was all too used to attitudes like Edi's, and since the talk with his Pa, even the shocking revelations about the hostages' deaths could be put under the heading of all the other bad things that had happened.
Descending the Kislik range took three days, and much of it was tedious after the excitement of seeing the distant ocean for the first time. They finally reached the bottom of the range with a couple of hours of daylight left. The other traders decided they would use the time to move their wagons closer to Darshek city. Misek and Risa decided that they preferred to camp where they were and make the final leg in the morning. Karik thought this was more for his and Gyo's sake, and wished Risa would just do as he always did.
It rained that night, and Karik wondered if Risa would have cause to regret the decision to delay, but the morning was bright and dry once again, far warmer than up on the plain, almost more like early summer than mid-winter. There was a spring in all their steps, even those of the beasts, knowing they were nearing journey's end. The return would be a little faster, so Risa said. "The hardest bit's over," he said with satisfaction. "But you boys have made it so much easier – well done," he said to them as they finished their breakfast.
Gyo grinned. Now they had shed the others he seemed lighter in heart, and Misek had been very patient and kind with him. Karik had always liked the man, but after this trip, he could see why his father considered Misek to be his closest friend, second possibly only to Kei, but only just. Even if Gyo's real father had been a Ruler of Darshek, he could not have had a better or a gentler man for his Pa. Except for Karik's own Pa, of course, and Karik wasn't prepared to give him up for anyone – not even Gyo.
The rain clouds came back mid-morning, and the last two hours of their journey into Darshek were marked by showers. Karik barely noticed – there was so much to see. So many houses and farms, all the fields of strange crops and fruit trees, the people in brightly coloured clothing hurrying past on foot or in small carts being drawn by strange looking, long-legged animals that Risa said were jesigs. "They started to come to Darshek after the war. Reji says he wants to breed them in his old age," he said with a chuckle.
They were pretty animals, Karik thought, long-necked and graceful, with short manes and glossy pelts in many shades from palest grey and blonde, to deepest black. He wanted to ride one very badly, and wondered if he would have the chance. But the jesigs were just one of the many new sights. Everywhere was so green and lush, the thick grass looking almost tasty enough for a human to eat. He'd never seen a landscape looking so fertile, not even Ai-Albon after a good summer rain.
But the people – so many of them, all so busy. And so many huge buildings, storehouses and workshops, far bigger than any he'd ever seen. And as they drew closer to the city, a couple of odd structures with fierce-looking statues outside of them. "Wuh-what are they?" Karik asked, pointing.
Risa grimaced. "Oh, those are Prijian temples," he said disdainfully. "So they can worship their horrible gods."
"Wo-worship?" Karik had only heard the word used among friends, or by his parents, to mean to like something very much.
"They think if they pray to their gods, they'll have good luck." Risa shrugged. "It's all a load of rot if you ask me. Kei thinks they're really funny."
Karik could only stare. The statue they were passing looked truly frightening, an enormous man carrying a huge bird poised for attack. There was an unpleasant smell coming from the temple. He didn't dare ask what it was, but he suspected it wasn't anything he wanted to know about.
He was still feeling a little apprehensive about meeting Arman again, but only a little, and he was happy that the weeks of travelling were over. But they still weren't done, and as Misek had warned, they still had to deliver their loads. They drove down to the docks, where Gyo and Karik frankly boggled at the huge ships waiting to be loaded with cargo, the people, the animals, and the smells. He hadn't realised air could be so...busy. The worst stink he'd ever experienced up to then was a rotting jombeker carcass he'd found once. The docks were worse because it wasn't a single nasty smell, it was dozens all mixed together. "Is there s-something dead?" he asked Risa, who only laughed.
"No, lad – just lots and lots of cargo from all over, and fruit going a little off. Someone needs to shift their stock."
Risa directed them to a huge warehouse where their companions from the trail were already half-way done with their unloading. There were plenty of men to help, but Gyo and Karik were pressed into service too.
It took hours, and they still then had to deliver the wagons and beasts to a huge public stable for safekeeping. Gyo was drooping in the humid heat and with tiredness by the time that was done. "How far to Kei's house?" he asked, hefting his pack and bedroll.
"Oh, about four miles," Misek said cheerfully. "They live right in the city itself, not far from the Rulers' house and the academy. Pleasant little stroll, nothing more."
"Oh, Pa," Gyo whined a little. "I can't walk that far today."
Risa grinned. "He's teasing, Gyo. It's not even two miles and we'll hitch a lift anyway. Come on, there are always carts and wagons going that way."
True to his word, they succeeding in hailing an empty cart that had just taken a load of melons to the docks. Risa and Misek chatted to the driver up on the driving seat, while Karik and Gyo rode in the back. Already they had seen many Prij, and some darker skinned people with slanted eyes who Misek said were from Andon. It seemed like people from all over Periter lived in Darshek. Certainly no one gave Karik a second look – for the first time in his life, he was nothing special. He liked that feeling a lot.
"Everything's so tall," Gyo said in an awed voice. "Look!"
"That's the academy," Risa said as they looked at the huge white stone and brick building set right on the harbour side. "Where Kei works. And there's the Rulers' House – there's a Ruler right there, wearing the dark red robes. See? Over there, getting into a carriage."
The boys goggled – this was one of the most powerful people in Darshian, people that villagers on the plains would never see unless they came to the city. "He looks pretty old," Gyo said doubtfully.
The driver chuckled. "Oh, that's Lord Meki. He's getting on a bit. The others are younger than him though. Right, men, this is where I have to let you off, I'm going south, and you want that direction," he said, pointing east. "Know where you're going?"
"Yes, we do. Thanks for the ride."
"Any time. Enjoy your stay!"
They had to walk about half a mile, through a pretty garden that Misek called a 'park', along well-made streets that were being swept clear of manure as they watched, and finally along a quiet road of houses. "Here we are," Risa said. "I wonder if Kei's home yet...."
The question had no sooner left his lips than the front door opened and there stood uncle Kei, grinning hugely. "What in hells kept you?" he joked as he walked down the short path to greet them,
Misek dropped his pack and let Kei pull him into a crushing hug. Risa was next and then Kei looked at Gyo. "Gods, Misek, what are you putting in the water down south! You're enormous, lad."
Gyo grinned as Kei hugged him. "I'll be nearly as tall as you one day," he said.
"That you might be, but you still have Arman to beat. And here's Karik." Kei pulled him close. His shirt smelled faintly of nitre weed and Karik wondered what he'd been doing. "How are you, Ka-chi?" he asked kindly.
"I'm fuh-fine."
"And that good-for-nothing father of yours?"
"S-sore. But he's all r-right."
"Glad to hear it." Kei kept his arm around Karik's shoulders as he waved them towards his front door. "Well, don't just stand there, come inside. Take your shoes off, we've got these stupid floors."
The house was like none Karik had ever seen, and seemed huge, at least from the outside. Kei called out as they walked in and began to unlace their boots. "Pira? The trouble's arrived!"
A door opened ahead of them, and a grey-haired woman came out. She seemed to be even older than Sira or Meis. "Welcome, welcome. I'm Pira, and don't any of you start that shouting business, not like this rude creature."
Kei abandoned Karik to go and cuddle her. "Sorry, Pira. Gyo, Karik, this is Pira, the lovely lady who keeps us both under control, fed and clean. We don't know what we'd do without her."
A friend, Karik wondered? Kei seemed very fond of her. "N-nice to muh-meet you, P-Pira."
"You're Karik? Kei told me what a good-looking lad you were," she said, taking his hand. Huh, Karik thought. No doubt Kei had actually told her to expect a blond short-arse with a stutter. "I bet you could all do with tea and sweet cakes."
"Oh, yes," Risa said with feeling. "Kei, can we dump our packs and sit? The lads are tired and so am I."
"Of course, Risa-ki. You're in the usual room – all of you, I hope you don't mind."
"Not at all, Kei. It'll just be good to sleep indoors again."
Kei lent them all soft slippers for wearing in the house, and once these were put on, led the way down a polished, wooden-floored corridor to a large room with two big beds in it. "I'll let you lot fight over who sleeps with who, just don't try and crawl in with me and Arman, he doesn't like to share."
"And I don't like to listen to you snore, so that's fine," Misek said tartly. "How is he? And where is he?"
Kei didn't pause as he helped them arrange their packs. "Oh, he's busy as usual. He's been helping them with the harbour redevelopment. You know Lady Jilki died? It was her project, really, and he's been picking up the pieces. He'll be home before dark, or he should be."
"So how come you're here?" Misek asked. "And how in hells did you know we would be here this afternoon?"
Kei grinned and tapped his temple. "Ah, I have friends in high places. You'll meet some of them while you're here, I hope. Risa, show the boys where to wash up, and then come through to the kitchen."
Risa took them to the washroom, and showed them where the earth closet was. It was a long house with many rooms, all with closed doors. As they passed a window, Risa pointed out Kei's garden. "You'll be interested in that, Karik. He's making a special study of moulds. Right up your street."
His friend was making gentle fun, but Karik's interest was immediately triggered. His Ma was always talking about leaf and other moulds, how they were being used to fight infection – that must be what Kei was working on. Karik knew that his Ma and uncle Kei were wrote back and forth about medical matters, and they talked often via Ma's friend, Neka. She must have told Kei they had arrived.
After they had relieved themselves and washed hands, faces and necks, they followed Risa to the large kitchen which smelled wonderfully of baking and made Karik instantly homesick for Sira's cooking. Kei greeted them warmly and told them to sit down, before putting a huge pot of tea and mugs down on the big table which, just like the one in Karik's home, was where food was prepared and eaten. So far, apart from the size of the house, it didn't seem Kei lived all that grandly. More of Karik's unease slipped away. This was just Kei and Arman – he'd known them all his life, seen them every year of his life. Any difficulties about Arman's past – or Karik's own – would surely be easily sorted out.
Kei slipped in next to Karik on the long bench seat. "So, tell me about the trip. Any excitement?"
"Nothing, except a broken wheel outside Ai-Kislik," Risa said, taking a cake from the plate Pira set in front of them and giving her his thanks for it.
Karik wondered why Risa hadn't mentioned Edi. Kei turned to him. "Well, Ka-chi, how did you find your first trading trip?"
He set his mug down. "Hard wuh-work," he said emphatically.
Kei laughed. "I bet it was, and Reji sure picked the worst run possible to get himself injured for. How did he manage that, Risa-ki?"
"I wasn't there, ask young Karik."
"Well?"
"The b-beast was ll-lame and acting wuh-weird. W-we tr-tried to catch it, but it k-kicked Pa in the knee. Then it ki-kicked him in the s-side."
Kei winced. "Oh dear. So it was sick – that explains it."
"Not just sick," Gyo said. "Ka-chi, tell him about that gall."
Karik had almost forgotten he had it with him to show Kei. "Y-yes. A ll-lump in its br-brain. I br-brought it for you."
"Oh?" Kei immediately looked interested. "Well, as soon as we finish here, you can show me in the workroom. I'm sure Pira doesn't want lumps of beast brain all over her table."
"How wise of you to work that out, Kei," she said dryly. "Everyone got enough tea and cakes? Supper won't be until Arman gets back."
Everyone nodded that they had enough. "Come and sit, Ma," Kei said, squishing up to give her room.
"Don't call me 'Ma', Kei, I bless the fact everyday I didn't have to raise you," she said, but smiled to show it was just a joke.
Misek grinned. "I see she's got the measure of you already, Kei."
Kei sighed. "I'm bullied all day, at the academy, here, Arman's always so horrible to me." Risa hooted with laughter, and Pira showed frank disbelief at this statement. "It's true. Only today I came to have lunch with him and the wretched man cut it short to go to a meeting with Lord Peika. I ask you, isn't that mean?"
"Poor, poor Kei," Misek said. "Best come back to Ai-Albon so we can treat you right. Or come to the herbarium, I could do with another hand."
"Speaking of which, how is it? And will Pia manage all right with you gone?"
"It's fine and of course, you idiot – would I leave my wife on her own? Her brothers are going to stay, and Reji said he would spend a week or so with her and Keira. I think Lori and Peit were going to drop in when they were next out hunting. We sorted everything before I left and I should be home before the next major batch of transplanting. I've got you two pounds of nern seeds."
"Oh good, we really needed those." Karik looked at him, and Kei explained. "New painkiller, we think. It seems to be good for women's monthly pains, and I'm trying it on a couple of patients who've had broken arms that still ache."
Karik nodded. That was Kei's other big thing – pain killers. Pijn was just too strong and too dangerous for so many things, especially chronic pain. "C-can you gr-grow nern pl-lants here?"
"We're going to try. Now, Gyo, Karik, tell me about the trip."
Kei listened as Gyo enthused about the joys of driving the wagons and the little dramas of the journey – still not mentioning the argument with the other traders, Karik noted. That was fine – if his friend wanted to keep it private, especially in front of Pira who'd they only just met, that was understandable. Risa and Misek added a little more detail as they consumed several mugs of tea and ate all of the delicious cakes. Pira was a wonderful cook, and clearly enjoyed watching them eat.
But finally Kei stood up. "Well, come and show me this lump, Karik. Gyo, do you feel like helping Pira? She could do with some pots washed."
"Sure, Kei."
"We won't be long," Kei assured Risa and Misek. "I just have a feeling you won't want to smell what I'm about to look at."
Risa pulled a face, and Misek chuckled. "You guessed right, Kei. I had enough of that when your father was alive." At Karik's enquiring look, he added, "Kei's Pa used to make the most amazing stinks. So did his Ma, come to think of it."
"All in the nature of scientific investigation, something I'm sure Karik understands," Kei said haughtily, but dropping Karik a wink which made him grin. "Come on, the workshop is at the back so I don't make the house reek."
"Mind you don't do that now, young man," Pira said, wagging a spoon at him. "Don't you dare spoil my cooking."
"No, Ma."
Kei put his hand on Karik's shoulder as they walked to the bedroom to fetch the wax-sealed pot that Karik had the gall stored in. "What did you use, nitre distillation?" Karik nodded. "Hmmm, I was afraid of that – you really need alcohol for storing flesh, although I don't blame Jena for not wanting to waste her stocks. I suspect this is going to be rather horrible."
Despite this dire warning, Kei was still completely cheerful as he led the way towards the back of the house. "It's a bit of a mess, I'm afraid," he said, pushing the door open.
Karik fell in love the moment he saw the room. There were plant being dried, pots with concoctions steeping in them, books and notes, scales for measuring seeds.... Never in his life had he felt so instantly at home. He made a beeline straight to where something was dripping slowly through fine cloth. "Wuh-what's this?"
"I macerated some quem leaves with chalk. I want to see if it's more effective than uyris flowers in lung fever for easing breathing." Kei let Karik have a sniff. It was pretty disgusting, and Kei smiled at Karik's expression. "Yes, that's the problem. If you give it to someone who's already ill, you just make them want to throw up, although it does ease the breathing very well. I'm playing with different combinations. Pira had a bad cold a few weeks ago and it made me determined to find something to help prevent colds getting worse. Elderly people shouldn't get lung fever as often as they do."
"Wuh-was s-she very sick?"
Kei nodded. "For a week or so I was really worried. She's only sixty three, but she's had a very bad year. She didn't need this on top of everything else."
"A f-friend?"
"Yes, of course – though she's our housekeeper really. Poor lady, she lost her husband six months ago and she couldn't keep their tanning business running, since they have no children and she couldn't manage on her own. All he left her were debts, it seemed, and she had to ask for charity from the state. Lady Nera asked if we could offer her a place to live and do some easy work, and we were glad to help."
Karik frowned. "A s-servant? Like Ah-Arman?"
Kei grinned. "Not quite. Neither of us would ever order her about as Lord Meki does with Arman, and even if she couldn't work at all, she would have a home with us. She's been very happy about you all coming to visit – she does love company. She gets rather lonely and depressed, and we can't be here all the time. I hope you'll be nice to her while you're here."
"Of c-course." The idea of Kei having a servant seemed rather odd to Karik but Pira seemed to be more like an adopted family member.
Kei was unsealing the pot with a sharp knife, but the faint hiss of gas that he released didn't bode well. "As I thought, it's gone rotten. Let's take it outside – I'll have to put it in the midden straight away or it will make everything in here stink."
He kept the bung firmly in place as he carried it out to the garden where there was just barely enough daylight left to see what they were doing. Kei took it to the compost heap and tipped out the contents of the pot. Immediately there was the most appalling smell, bad enough to make Karik almost gag. Worse than that, the gall had simply turned to an unidentifiable sludge. Kei poked it with a stick and then covered it with some plant litter which cut down the smell immediately. "So much for that. Can you describe it?"
Karik did so as much as he could and Kei nodded. "Interesting – I've seen that a couple of times in jesigs – never heard of it in urs beasts before. How long had Reji had that animal?"
"He tr-traded it th-ree months ago."
"Ah. Then I bet you'll find it came from Urshek originally, or near there. The lump is a very slow growing cyst caused by a parasite you get in Kuprij and in the wettest areas of the south. The worm gets into the brain and makes the gall which you've seen. Sends the animals mad, makes them very aggressive and dangerous. The Prij have a lot of problems in lemuls with such things too – jombekers aren't quite as prone to them but it's still a problem. I think there are some letters at the academy about these infections – perhaps you could look at them before you go?"
"I'd ll-like that."
"Good," Kei said, beaming at him. "So, how are you finding being away from home for the first time? Homesick?"
"All the t-time," Karik admitted. "Wuh-wish Pa was here."
"Yes, I know. I'm sure he didn't want to send you away on your own for your first visit to Darshek. When I came up here to do my training, I cried myself to sleep for weeks. Even when I moved up here with Arman, I missed everyone so much." Kei smiled. "That's why I go back every summer. That was the deal I cut with the academy – I had to be allowed to go back to the village once a year if they wanted me. But I still miss your parents and Myka and Fedor and everyone else. I'm just glad I see Reji and Risa every so often. It's so good to have you all here, Karik. I've really been looking forward to it."
The way Kei said it, Karik knew it had to be true. "I wuh-wanted to come, only P-Pa...." He stopped. He didn't want to complain about something that wasn't his father's fault.
"Yes, unfortunate, that. Never mind, Karik, you'll be home soon enough and then you and he can swap traders' tales. Oh, before it gets too dark, let me show you something." He walked over to a bed and crouched down in front of a small shrub. "Recognise this?" he asked, touching the plant with his palm.
Even in the gathering gloom, Karik knew what it was. "That's...."
"Yes, the sample you sent us. It grows amazingly fast if you give it enough water. Since Jena didn't have a name for it, we called it 'kariken' so now you have a plant species named after you."
"R-really?" Karik stared at the nondescript bush. He had found it growing half shaded by a boulder, and since he'd not seen it before, he'd told his Ma. It was she who'd picked the leaves and collected the seeds. Karik had found more plants like it, but hadn't thought it was anything remarkable. It wasn't common and tended to like damp environments where water ran off rocks.
"Yes, really. We've managed to get it to grow in Utuk and in Urshek – I think it's probably more suited to wetter climates, but it seems adaptable."
"Wuh-why?"
Kei understood what he was really asking. "Because I wanted to see if we could propagate it for one thing – and it turns out that if you made an infusion of the dried leaves, and mix a little nitre weed with it, it becomes an excellent foot wash for prevention of fungus. We've just ordered it used in the army. So soldiers all over Darshian are going to be feeling a lot more comfortable, thanks to you."
If Kei had suddenly announced the Rulers wanted him, Karik, to join their ranks, he couldn't have felt more proud. His Ma would be so pleased. "I'm g-glad," was all he said. The bush looked so ordinary – the only thing about it was that its leaves were dark red, almost crimson in certain lights, but they were spindly and sparse, at least on the specimen he'd seen near the village. This one was much more lush.
"I thought you'd be pleased. If only everyone in the villages on the plain had your eye, Karik, we could probably solve all the ills in Periter." Kei stood up and then seemed to hesitate. "Karik...everything was all right on the journey up here? I only ask because Gyo seemed a little uncomfortable about something, and so did Risa." Karik tended to forget that Kei was a soul-toucher – of course he'd noticed something had been kept from him. "You lads didn't have an argument, did you?"
Karik hesitated too, but then shook his head. "N-no."
"Feel like telling me about it?"
"I-if you wuh-want."
"Then come into the workshop, I need to seal up that filtration I've made anyway."
It was now almost completely dark, and Kei used a little sparking device to set the lamp alight – Karik hardly ever saw one used in his home, of course, with his Pa around. Then Kei lit two other larger lamps which illuminated the worktable efficiently. He began to fuss with the filtration equipment and decanting the dark liquid. "Just tell me what you're comfortable with, Karik."
Because it was Kei, and because he knew Kei never judged or got angry, Karik found it easier than he expected it to be. Kei listened in complete silence, just nodding from time to time as Karik slowly explained – he decided not to mention what he'd heard about Arman. When he was done, Kei still stayed quiet, apparently lost in thought, although his hands were fiddling with the quill he'd used to label the bottle of filtrate. "It's odd how these things come up again," he finally said in a low voice. "I forget about the time in Utuk for days at a time, then something – a voice, something I read, even a colour or a smell – will bring it back as if it was just yesterday I was a hostage. Don't be too hard on Edi, Karik. He had a very bad time of it, and I know it might seem cruel of him to bring up... the deaths, but it's not something any of us can ever forget." He rubbed his chest a little. "I think I need to have a talk with Gyo about what happened to his mother, and about the war. I know Pia finds it hard to speak about it. Does Jena talk to you?"
Karik shook his head. "It m-makes her sad."
"Yes, it probably does. Some people cope by talking, others not." Kei looked at him with a wry smile. "And I understand you want to talk to Arman while you're up here."
Ma must have told him, but Karik wished she hadn't. He'd almost decided it wasn't something he was going to bring up after all. But since Kei had raised it, Karik supposed it would have to be done. "Wuh-will he t-tell me?"
"He might. A lot depends on how he thinks you'll deal with it." He placed his quill down carefully and began to straighten the papers on the table, carefully placing slips of paper in his books and closing them. "But tell me this – do you want to know who your blood mother and father are?"
Karik knew the answer to this question was important but all he could say was, "I d-don't know."
Kei nodded as if it had been what he expected. "Just as Arman doesn't know if he wants to tell you. It's been much on his mind, Karik, what to say to you. My advice is to be patient. Arman doesn't do well when pushed, and this is a subject on which he finds it impossible to be entirely calm. I think you're old enough now to know adults don't always know the answers to everything. I certainly don't," he added with a smile. "Tell me, what do you think of these flowers? Have you seen anything like these in your wanderings?"
Voyaging - Chapter 5
Arman walked up the path to his home, and wished he didn't know he had a house full of visitors to greet him. Neka had sent him Kei's message that he knew Misek and the others were at the docks, and that he would be going back early to help Pira prepare. Arman would have liked to have joined him and would certainly like to be able to spend some quiet time with him this evening. There had been an unusually large number of fraught interactions over the harbour improvements today, to the point where the usually genial and placid Lord Peika had actually shouted at one of the architects to get out of his sight or he would wring his pissing neck. Not that Arman could blame the Ruler – the architect was being about as irritating as it was possible to be – but it just showed how short tempers had become after Lady Jilki's death. Colonel Jiv was doing his best, but he had so much to absorb before he could really become an effective replacement.
Sighing, Arman opened his front door and shed his cloak and his boots. He could hear voices in the kitchen and so headed in that direction. He found Misek, Risa and Gyo all helping Pira prepare supper. Misek came over and clasped his hand warmly. Arman returned his greeting with real affection – Misek was one of his favourite people, and one of Kei's dearest friends. "How was the trip?" he asked as Risa also shook his hand.
"Very good. Even with all that winter rain, the road was fine."
"Excellent." Arman made a point of checking with traders from the plains that his road improvements and the maintenance programme were continuing to be effective. So far, they were. "And how are you, Gyo?"
The boy had stood when Arman came in – gods, had he grown so much in just five months? "I'm fine, Arman."
"You look it. I see Pira's put you to work," he added with a smile at her.
"Not me, that lazy Kei set them to it and then escaped all the chores," she said in mock reproof.
"Ah. Then I'll find him and chastise him for you, mistress Pira. Where is he?"
"Out in the workroom. The other lad had something nasty to show him, didn't want to make my kitchen smell."
"Oh?"
"A gall from the brain of the beast that kicked in Reji's ribs," Misek explained. "Karik brought it all the way from Ai-Albon to show Kei."
"An unusual gift – most people would bring sweetmeats," Arman said with a straight face. Risa grinned. "However, knowing Kei, I'm sure he prefers the gall. I'll go fetch them and you can have your revenge for him abandoning you."
"Dinner will be just half an hour, Arman," Pira called as he left the room. Good, he was hungry.
Pira had already lit the hall lamps, lighting the corridor with a soft yellow glow. He walked to the end and opened the door of Kei's workroom. "Oh, hello, Arman," his lover greeted him cheerfully. "You're late."
"I'm sorry, I had to stop Peika killing a damn architect and then he needed to blow steam at me for a few minutes."
Kei came over and gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Lord Peika wanted to kill someone?"
"Technically I was going to hold the man down while Peika strangled him. Not a court in the land would have convicted us, I'm sure. Hello, Karik."
"Huh-hello, Ah-Arman," the boy said, looking a little apprehensive.
"What's this I hear about you presenting Kei with bits of dead animal? A strange way to show affection, I must say."
He was only joking, but immediately regretted it as a slow flush crept over Karik's fair cheeks. Kei nudged Arman in the ribs and not gently. "Don't be mean, Arman. It's actually something quite interesting – first report of a grass parasite in an urs beast brain. I'm hoping it's an isolated case – those things are damn hard to get rid of."
"Oh – you're right, that is interesting." In parts of Kuprij, on the smaller islands, they were a major pest and had to be dealt with by stringent culling and grass burning. "Misek said it was from the beast that attacked your father?"
"Y-yes. It wuh-went m-m...." Karik stopped, obviously frustrated by being unable to get the word out, his face even redder than before.
"I've seen jesigs suddenly turn quite ferocious because of these cysts," Arman said, trying to pretend the boy's stutter was unimportant. "Kei, we'll probably need to let the villages know to watch out for the parasite, and to make sure that all meat is well-cooked."
"They do that anyway," Kei said, sounding distracted. He laid a hand on Karik's shoulder. "Why don't you find Gyo? Arman and I will join you in a few minutes, and then we can have supper."
Karik nodded and slid quickly away from Kei's grasp. He bobbed a quick nod at Arman, and then scurried out. Kei waited until the door closed and then he sighed. "Damn, his stammer almost disappeared for a while there, and then you come in and make that stupid remark...." He aimed a cuff at Arman's head. "You can't tease him like that, you idiot."
"You do," Arman protested. "He's not made of glass."
Kei shook his head at him. "I'm not you. And right now, after the trip and with what happened to Reji and everything else...my love, you forget how intimidating you can be to people, and since you're the one who can unlock the secret of his past, he's feeling rather nervous of you anyway. Just be gentle with him," he said, laying his hand on Arman's shoulder and then kissing his cheek. "They met up with Edi from Ai-Kislik. He made some accusations, told Karik and Gyo some unpleasant facts. I gather it upset Gyo more than Karik, or at least, Karik is mature enough to deal with it better, but it's very unfortunate. Gyo didn't need it on top of the recent news, and Karik hasn't got his father with him to help smooth things over for him."
"I'm sorry," Arman said, and meant it. He hadn't wanted to hurt the boy's feelings.
"I know." Kei slid his arms around Arman's waist. "Anyway... it's his birthday tomorrow. Is that a good time to talk to him, perhaps?"
"I'm not convinced there is a good time, Kei. But I'll make time for him tomorrow in the afternoon. Bring them for lunch at the Rulers' House and I'll speak to him afterwards. If you can get the others to do something else...?"
"I'll arrange it. Thank you, Arman. The sooner it's done, then the boys can relax and if there's any problem, we have time to deal with it before they leave."
Arman nodded – that was exactly his thought on the subject, not that he really wanted to do this at all. "Sorry about today," he said. "All I can say is that our architects are lucky they're dealing with me and Peika and Meki – if it was Kita, they'd all be dead by now."
"If they continue to run you ragged like this, I might have to consider bundling them off to Utuk for her to deal with," Kei said seriously. "I'm certainly going to tell Lord Meki off when I see him. You're not the only person he can call on, and if you are, then he needs to look to his organisation."
"I'm all right, Kei. I'm used to it, after all."
"Well, I'm damn well not. I refuse to lose you to bureaucracy. You came north looking for happiness, and happiness you shall have."
Arman couldn't help but smile at Kei's fierce expression. "I am happy," he said quietly. "Every day I come home to you. What man has more?"
"Well, for one – me," Kei said, his expression becoming impish. "Now come along and be pleasant. I know you can do it, if pressed."
"If pressed," Arman agreed, letting himself be tugged along by his hand. Despite Kei's protest, he knew perfectly well he had the best of the deal, and he wouldn't want it any other way.
Now he'd been alerted to the need for extra caution, Arman did what he should have done before he opened his mouth, and paid attention to how the two boys had grown and changed since he'd last seen them in the summer. Gyo had put on height, but was still rather young for his age, Arman thought – the natural result of a rather isolated existence, he supposed. Still a gentle soul, rather in need of his father's attention which Misek gave freely, and also looking to Karik for a little guidance too, which was new. At least, Arman amended, he'd not observed it before.
Karik seemed to have matured a good deal, although he was less obviously physically changed. Despite the slight growth of fine hairs on his upper lip, he remained almost girlishly pretty, with large, intelligent eyes, and the fine bone structure that was entirely his mother's. He had nothing at all in his looks of his father, for which Arman was thankful – but being faced with a masculine version of Mayl was only slightly less disconcerting. Karik was going to grow up to be even more handsome than Mayl was beautiful, and even if he grew no taller, he would still be considered an attractive man.
At least he would if he ever got over this terrible stutter. Arman noticed that it did indeed get better or worse depending on who spoke to him and on what topic, and thought it might be worth asking his father if anyone in Utuk had ever successfully treated such a bad stammer. Arman had known boys in the nobility who'd stuttered and who had conquered it so that they could take up their senatorial positions. If Karik was ever to make something of himself, Arman thought with a grimace, he would need to overcome this disability.
Their visitors were clearly weary, and after the meal, Kei suggested the four of them have a bath. In the village, Kei would have joined them but Arman had never been able to shed this last vestige of his Prijian upbringing, the feeling it was just wrong to bathe with anyone other than his lover. Kei had had to explain this to Pira – the poor woman had to bathe alone, which Arman knew went contrary to all polite practice among the Darshianese, but he simply could not bring himself to lounge naked in front of a woman old enough to be his mother. Kei had given up teasing him on the subject – he knew a lost cause when he saw it.
Instead, he and Kei cleaned up the kitchen while Pira did a little darning. Kei was trying to make sure she didn't overdo it after the bad cold which she had only just fully got over in the last week or so. He knew the knack of making it seem that Pira was supervising their worthless persons as they carried out tasks that they should be doing anyway, and so preserving her fragile self-esteem. Although Pira had loved him dearly, her husband had been a rather controlling character, so Lady Nera had reported to them. It was all too easy for her to be made to feel as if she had no power over her destiny, and Kei wanted to make sure she felt in charge of her little domain, even if it was just this house.
Kei saw him smiling. "What are you thinking of?"
"You, naturally," Arman said, leaning over for a kiss, and then handing his lover a pot to rinse.
Pira smiled at their interaction. "Those boys are very well-brought up young men, don't you think?"
"A credit to their parents," Kei agreed.
"Pity about that poor lad's stutter though. Such a pretty child and then he opens his mouth and spoils it."
Kei turned so only Arman could see his frown. "He'll grow out of it," he said cheerfully, although Arman could tell his tone was slightly forced. "Just like he'll grow taller, right, Arman?"
"He might indeed. I wasn't much taller at his age, and look at me."
Kei did so with obvious admiration. "Hmmm, I think one giant around me is enough," he said, and Pira chuckled.
"The way they eat, I'm sure they'll be taller than either of you." She packed her darning away. "I think I'll go to bed, if you're finished in here."
"Of course," Kei said, offering his arm to help her to her feet, though she didn't need it. "Goodnight," he said gently, kissing her cheek. "A wonderful meal, as usual."
"It will be even better tomorrow for the child's birthday, I promise," she said, smiling. "Good night, Arman."
Kei came back to the sink as the door closed. "Karik doesn't need pity," he said quietly. "And only a fool would think he was one, just because of a stammer."
"Yes – but she's right that it does detract from people's impression of him."
Kei turned to him. "I'm going to find someone, anyone, who knows how to treat such things, Arman. The lad has a truly remarkable mind. To have it disregarded over something so trivial is a pure crime. I don't understand where he got his intelligence from, since you hold his parents in such low regard – it's nothing short of miraculous."
"Mayl isn't stupid, actually," Arman said, putting some elbow grease into removing a bit of baked-on food. "She just found it easier to get by on her looks and with manipulation, and of course, she had no education to speak of. Her father was sharp enough, though he was a perfect bastard. Mekus is nothing remarkable, unless you value cunning – he has that in barrow loads."
"Karik has not a drop of that in him, for which we should be thankful. He's so innocent, Arman. I almost wish I could preserve him as he is, for all he needs to learn a little worldliness. Such a beautiful soul."
"Does he need to be worldly, living in Ai-Albon? He could be like Misek and run a nursery, never be troubled by the outside world at all."
Kei gave him a sharp look, and then wiped his hands – they were nearly done, and so Kei put the kettle on for a last cup of tea before retiring. "I wouldn't say the village is a place for innocents, Arman. It's not that he's not suffered at all, or he wouldn't be so lacking in confidence, but somehow it's managed to leave his soul untouched. He has one of the purest hearts I've ever sensed. If it wouldn't grieve Jena and Reji terribly, I would beg to have him stay with us."
Arman raised a eyebrow at the strongly expressed words. "Neither of us have time for him, and you know it."
"Yes, but that's also a cause for regret," he said with a sigh. "I know, I know." He shook his head, perhaps at his own foolishness. "I still want to help him. I think he would be much improved if we could build his confidence." Kei fixed Arman with a look. "You can do much in that respect. You are a role model, or you would be, if you let it."
"The boy can barely speak to me, Kei."
"Because you terrify him. Try not be so damn gruff all the time. He's not a soldier."
"I can't be pampering children...."
"Karik is not a child, Arman. He's sixteen. Old enough to take on a trade, to father a child, and nearly old enough to come to the academy if he wanted. I'm not asking you to pamper him. Just treat him as you would me. As an adult."
Arman couldn't help a grin. "And what makes you think I've ever treated you as an adult?"
Kei stuck out his tongue, which rather tended to prove Arman's point. "You know what I mean, horrible man. Now stop messing around with those pots and make the tea. You're not the only one who's had an irritating day. I wonder if there's something in the air to make people so troublesome."
Arman obeyed, feeling a little remorseful that he hadn't even asked how Kei's day had been. He was even more grateful that Kei had refused the academy position and decided not to mention Lord Meki's visit earlier. Nothing had changed, and Kei had enough to think about.
He made the tea and brought the pot and mugs to the table, before sliding onto the bench next to Kei and putting his arm around him, kissing his hair. "So, plans for tomorrow?"
"I know Mis and Risa can't spend all day at leisure, so I thought they could take the boys around the city tomorrow, and then I'll have them in the afternoon. If we meet you for lunch, then you can talk to Karik and then I'll take them to the academy and show them the library. I can't spare a lot of time this week, although I'm trying to clear at least one whole day. Any chance you can?"
How could Arman refuse with those wonderful eyes turned on him? "I'll try," he murmured. "I won't promise but I surely will try."
"Thank you," Kei said contentedly, laying his head on Arman's shoulder. "I wish it was summer so we could escape."
Arman kissed him again, this time on the lips, enjoying the warm taste of Kei's clever mouth. "Tell you what – when Misek and the others leave, I'll have a talk to Lord Meki. I could agree to what he wants, but insist on having a clear day a week, and maybe half the evenings utterly free without any argument – and we still go home every year."
Kei stared. "Is it possible you could really do that? You said it wasn't."
"For you, I'll make it possible. Besides, if Meki wants me that badly, he'll agree. You forget the rest of the country has to agree to his nomination and that's not assured by any means – but if he wants to put my name forward, those are my conditions. I want to cut back anyway." He kissed Kei again. "Meki hasn't anything else in his life," he said gently. "I most certainly do. What do you say?"
"I say it sounds fair. You need to serve, Arman, it's in your blood and you're good at it. So am I. But like you, I have more in my life than my work." He stroked Arman's face and gave him a sad smile. "Karik was lucky you didn't give him to me, I suppose. We barely have time for each other, let alone enough to raise a child."
Arman kissed Kei's fingers, and again regretted that he had deprived his lover at the one chance he'd ever had at being a parent. The least he could do was to give Kei his own company. Darshian would continue to receive his service – but so would Kei.
Karik slept badly, but he wasn't sure why, since the bed was comfortable, and Gyo lying beside him was a familiar, welcome presence. Karik was also very tired and had really wanted to get some sleep, so he was frustrated to be still staring at the ceiling hours after they had all gone to bed. When he finally did drop off, dark nightmares woke him up, his heart hammering and sweat cooling on his face, even though he couldn't remember what they were about. Even though it wasn't yet dawn, he knew he wouldn't be able to get back to sleep.
If he'd been home, he would have just got up – lit a lamp and found a book, or started to prepare breakfast – but he couldn't do that here, for fear of waking someone or interfering where he wasn't wanted. So all he could do was lie still and wonder how his sixteenth birthday would pass. He had completely forgotten about it until something Misek had said as they were turning in reminded him. No one had mentioned it, and he wondered if Kei or Arman would remember. Not that it mattered. Being away from his parents meant it wouldn't be as much fun as he would like, although being with Gyo was good.
He rolled over and waited patiently for some sign that it was all right to get up. As the dawn broke, he thought he heard low voices, and some gentle clinking. Then a heavy door opened and closed somewhere in the house. But still he wasn't sure if he should leave the room.
But a few minutes later, Risa made a low grunt and rolled over on the other bed, opening his eyes and seeing Karik watching him. "Oh, Ka-chi – happy birthday."
Karik smiled. So they hadn't forgotten. "Th-thanks. C-can I get up?"
"Sure. Kei's probably already up, they're both early risers. Head along to the kitchen, we'll find you."
Risa had been whispering and so had Karik, so neither Misek nor Gyo were disturbed. Karik quietly found a clean shirt and overshirt to wear, then decided he needed to change his trousers – Kei had mentioned they might go to the academy today.
He slipped out of the room just as Risa was yawning a little and scratching his hair – he would be up soon, Karik knew – and found his way to the washroom to wash face and hands. Then he went to the kitchen, from where cooking smells were already coming. Kei was making batter cakes which sizzled and spat in the pan as he dropped them into it. "Good morning, Karik. Happy birthday."
"Th-thanks. Wuh-where's Ah-Arman?"
"Oh, long gone," Kei said cheerfully. "He likes to get in early when he can, especially if he wants to have some clear time in the afternoon, and since he's going to arrange lunch for you all as a birthday treat, he had things to do before then."
"Oh." Karik hadn't expected Arman to do anything at all for his birthday. "He d-doesn't m-mind?"
"Of course not," Kei said with a big smile, deftly flipping the cakes in the pan. "Would you get some plates out for me?"
Karik had just finished setting out plates for everyone when Risa came in, still yawning and muttering greetings to Kei. A few moments later, Pira emerged. "Now what are you doing in my kitchen, Kei?"
"I'm sorry, Ma, I was trying to help," he said with a comically hang-dog expression. "I thought the boys would be hungry."
"Yes, but they need something decent, not bachelor cooking," Pira grumbled.
Kei, whose cooking Karik knew to be perfectly fine, dropped a wink at him. It was clearly a little joke the two of them had going, and not to be taken seriously.
"Happy birthday, young man. Are you planning some fun for today?"
Karik looked at Kei, who answered. "Not in the least," he said. "I was going to set him to scrub our floors, and then shift the compost heap, and then I thought he could come to the academy and dust all the books. Ow!" he yelped, shaking his hand vigorously – he'd got his knuckles rapped for his silliness. "Why, you don't think that's a perfect way to spend a sixteenth birthday? Isn't that how you spent yours, Risa-ki? I know that's how I spent mine."
"You're an idiot, Kei," Risa said, pouring himself and Karik some milk from the jug Pira had put out for them. "Don't worry, Karik, your Pa told me to make sure you enjoy yourself." He reached into the pocket of his overshirt and drew something out wrapped in cloth. "It's nothing much, but I hope you like it," he said, handing it to Karik.
Karik unwrapped the object and found it was a gike plumwood hair clasp, lovingly carved and polished until it was as shiny as the tero stone he was wearing around his neck. "It's b-beautiful."
"Can I see?" Kei asked. "Oh, yes, indeed – lovely work, Risa. I'm glad you still make such things – after Pa died, you seemed to be the only one who could match his skill."
Risa shrugged. "It's something to do while we're travelling."
"Let's put it on you," Kei said. Karik turned obediently and let Kei fasten it to the top of his braid. "It looks fine. Not a Ruler has anything better, I swear."
Karik flushed with pleasure. "Th-thanks, Risa. I ll-love it."
"I'm glad, Ka-chi. You have such nice hair, shame not to show it off a little."
"Very nice," Pira agreed, as she tended to Kei's batter cakes. "Prettier than any girl's."
This time, Karik's flush was from embarrassment, but he only nodded as he drank his milk. It was clearly a day old, but still good – he wondered where they got their milk from. "Wuh-where do you g-get food?"
"Buy it, you mean? From the market – Risa, you'll be taking them down to show them all that this morning, won't you? I have to be at the academy in an hour, but we can meet at the Rulers' House at noon."
Risa nodded. "Of course. We don't want to put you out, Kei."
"You're not, you're a most welcome addition to my routine. It's a shame Arman is so busy but he's going to try and clear a day, and then we might be able to take a jesig cart out along the coastal cliffs."
Now that was something Karik really would like to do, and he hoped Arman would be able to manage it, but it sounded as if it was going to be difficult for him. "D-does he r-really huh-have a lot of cleaning to d-do?" Kei and Risa both stared at Karik in confusion. "He s-said he was a s-servant. Muh-Meis said they c-clean floors and th-things."
Kei covered his mouth, his glee-filled eyes telling Karik that he was trying to hold in riotous laughter. Risa just chuckled while Pira started to explain. Kei held his hand up. "Oh gods, please let me be the one to tell Arman that. Better, let me tell Lord Meki. No, Ka-chi," he said, his eyes bright with amusement. "He's not that kind of servant – I'd bet he wishes he was sometimes. He helps the Rulers with planning and negotiations, and he's been working on the redesign of the harbour."
"But...."
"Karik, Arman was making a joke at his own expense," Risa said. "He's not really a servant at all – he receives no salary, does it all purely for love."
"That's right," Kei said, nodding, "if I didn't earn my keep, we'd be beggars."
Karik was now the one completely confused. "B-but...." He looked around the large kitchen, and at Pira. "You're r-rich?"
Kei laughed again. "Hardly. The house belongs to the state, and because of the work we both do here, we get an allowance for its upkeep and for some of our living expenses. Pira's wage is paid by Lady Nera, since Lord Meki insisted that we needed someone to help us manage our lives...."
"Which you do," Pira said severely.
"Which we undoubtedly do," Kei agreed without a shred of embarrassment. "Arman receives small gifts of food and books from the Rulers occasionally, and so do I from friends, but we're not rich."
"I still think he should have a salary for all the work he does – every day, up at dawn, working until nightfall," Pira said. "Not even Jen worked so hard...Jen was my husband," she explained to Karik and Risa.
"Maybe so," Kei said, "but the Rulers receive no salary either. Arman was offered one, but refused. He said the house was enough, and I agree. We don't starve, do we, Ma?"
"Hardly," she said, choosing that moment to set the first batch of batter cakes down on the table, where they were pounced on immediately by Kei and Risa. "But the Rulers all have other sources of income. He doesn't."
Was Karik only imagining that Kei's bright smile darkened for a brief moment before he answered? "It's how he wants it, Pira, and I agree. Anyway, Karik, Arman doesn't clean the Rulers' floors. He does polish these from time to time, which is a sight to see, I can tell you."
Karik nodded, now embarrassed at his misapprehension. He didn't have long to enjoy his chagrin though, as Misek and Gyo came into the kitchen, obviously hungry and looking at the hot food like it was all that stood between them and total starvation. The topic of Arman's working arrangements was buried under more birthday wishes, and discussion of what they would be doing that day. Kei only waited long enough to bolt down some batter cakes with butter, to admire the rather fine box with a sliding, inlaid lid that Gyo and his father had made for Karik – "to keep stones and things in," Gyo told him somewhat shyly – and to tell them to be sure to meet him at the Rulers' House at noon, before he excused himself. "I'm teaching anatomy this morning," he said by way of explanation, "and my students don't like it when I'm late. I'll see you in a few hours. Enjoy yourselves." He gave Pira a quick kiss on the cheek and then he was off.
Misek shook his head. "He never changes," he said fondly. "So, Karik, what would you like to do this morning? We could go to the markets, or visit the public menagerie, or see the new herbarium."
Karik would really have liked to attend Kei's anatomy class, actually, but unless he was to train as a healer, he supposed he would never get the chance. He could tell which of the options Gyo wanted. "M-markets?"
"Fine, that will let me get some of the things Pia wanted, and Ma. Risa, did you get a list from Jena?"
"Jena, and Sira, and Myka...." Risa groaned. "I think they think I have nothing to do but visit the market stalls when I come up here."
Misek chuckled. "But you don't, surely. I can get most of it, I think. We're meeting Aito this afternoon, yes?"
"Yes, I need to catch him before his ship sails."
"A ship?" Gyo said eagerly. "I'd really like to see a ship."
Risa frowned. "Not sure there'll be time, not if Kei wants to take you around the academy after lunch...."
"But uncle Risa, I'd rather see a ship than the academy."
There was an obvious solution to Karik's mind. "Wuh-why don't I s-stay with K-Kei, and you c-can g-go with your P-Pa?"
"He'll think I'm rude," Gyo said sadly.
"Nonsense, son, Kei won't mind. He's only trying to show you what you might be interested in. I'll just tell him you're to come with me, that's all," Misek said. "What about you, Karik? Academy or ship?"
"Ac-academy." He would like to see a ship, but he'd longed to see where Kei taught medicine ever since he'd heard of the place.
"Why am I not surprised?" Risa said with a chuckle. "Well, come on, lads, eat up. The city's a big place, and I've got a long list of things to get for some very determined women."
There were more people in the market than Karik had ever seen in his life – easily twice as many as were in the whole of Ai-Albon – and his head spun from the riot of colours and sounds and smells. Stall holders called out prices for the wares, people haggled fiercely over goods, and there were bells attached to some of the stalls, that rang sonorously in the breeze. Karik and Gyo kept close to the older men, who seemed utterly unfazed by the clamour. "I won't be getting the main stores from here," Risa explained as they moved through the throng. "But I can get a few speciality items, thread and dye for Ma, that kind of thing. Might be a good place to pick up a small gift for your mother and sister, Gyo."
Gyo nodded. Karik wondered what he could get his own Ma, or even if she would like something bought, not made by his own hand. He'd counted the coins that his Pa had given him – there were twenty rina, and two pikin. Enough to buy a couple of generous meals, Misek said, but not much more. He decided he would wait until later in the week before making a decision.
Risa seemed to know exactly where to go and led them to a dark, crowded stall jammed between ones selling brightly coloured cloth. The one which he stopped in front of was piled high with sacks of dye powder and behind the elderly woman who seemed to be the owner, were long reels of thread and wool. She greeted Risa as an old friend. "Where's Reji?"
"Hurt himself," Risa said, handing over his list to her. "Wira, this is my brother, Misek, his son Gyo, and his friend, Karik."
She said hello and then smiled at Karik, before saying something that Karik completely failed to understand. He looked helplessly at Risa for help. Risa coughed. "Uh, Wira, Karik doesn't speak Prijian. He's actually Darshianese – Reji's boy."
"What? With that colouring?" She squinted at him. "You're joking, Risa."
"No, I'm not. Wira, it's Karik's birthday and their first visit to Darshek, so if I could leave my list with you and collect it later this week, I'd be grateful."
"Of course. No offence meant, Risa. Karik, I didn't mean to be rude. Wait a moment." She rummaged around behind her counter and pulled something out with a small cry of triumph. "My daughter makes these. Put out your hand, young man." Hesitantly he obeyed, and she fixed a small band around his wrist. When she was done, he looked at it – it was woven from very fine wool, and there was the image of a bird flying embroidered into the cloth. It had a simple metal clasp and a leather backing. "Do you like it?"
"Y-yes. H-how m-much?" He hoped it wasn't expensive, or if it was, that it wasn't rude to refuse.
"Oh, nothing, nothing – a birthday gift for you. It's only a small thing, but the young people seem to like them. Handsome fellow like you should have some adornments, don't you think?"
Karik nodded and showed Gyo. "It's great, Ka-chi! Pa, maybe Keira would like something like that?"
"Perhaps, son, but there's lots more to see. Risa?"
"Yes. Wira, thanks for the gift, and I'll be back in a couple of days. Boys?"
"Th-thank you," Karik said politely to the woman, who beamed at him. Then he followed the others as Risa led them further up the street.
"Sorry about that, Karik. Most of the people in the market speak two or even three languages, and she thought she was being polite. You'd think the braid would give you away as one of our own, right, Mis?"
"Yes. Don't take it personally, Karik."
"I wuh-won't," Karik assured them, looking at the band again.
"People can be rude to me too if I can get things like that," Gyo said cheerfully and Karik laughed. It hadn't been such a bad deal, certainly.
They spent a couple of hours looking around the market and shops, boggling at the variety and the oddness of many of the goods that were for sale, and also doing a good bit of people watching. The Andonese were the strangest things on display, Karik decided. The men looked so fierce and solemn, and their women so serious. They wore loose robes, rather than shirts and trousers, and the men covered their short black hair with leather caps, the women using heavy scarves to veil their own, even in the humid warmth of the sunny day. Some of the men had wispy beards, something neither Gyo nor Karik had ever seen. They spoke in a harsh, clipped language that was almost like the raucous sounds of krackkrack birds. Karik wondered what kind of environment produced such a language, and such people.
The Andonese were far outnumbered by the Prij, who were both customers and traders. A good number lived permanently in Darshek, Misek said, and Wira wasn't the only person to assume Karik spoke Prijian that morning. Risa gave up apologising, just shaking his head ruefully before explaining to whoever it was who'd made the mistake. Karik didn't mind really – he was more curious about the language itself which seemed a little like Darshianese in tone, but utterly unlike in the words. "Ri-Risa, do you sp-speak Prijian?"
"A few words, no more. I don't really need it, though I dare say by the time you lads are full-grown it would be useful if you ever came back here. You can see how many Prij are in the city – a lot more than even when I first came up four years ago. Kei said he's had to polish up what he learned in the war."
"Is it hard to learn?" Gyo asked as they made their way towards the far end of the market, heading to what Risa said was the banking area of the city.
"I don't think so – depends on how much you want to, and what you'll use it for. Personally, I'm more than happy not to deal with the Prij direct," he added darkly.
There were fewer people at this end of the marketplace, but it was still crowded. It seemed this was the area for selling fruit and herbs, and business was brisk. Risa bought them each a pale yellow fruit which he said was called a quilo and came from the south. Karik bite into his cautiously – it had a soft skin, slightly bitter, but inside it was sweet with an edge of tartness – delicious, he thought. It had a hard stone at its centre, and when he finished eating, he carefully wrapped the seed and that from Gyo's fruit in his handkerchief. When he got home, he would try to grow it.
As he was stowing his prize, he saw a movement that caught his eye – a tall Prijian boy at the stall in front of them, paying for some fruit. What had caught Karik's attention was the fact he had a green lizard sitting on his shoulder, with a little chain around its neck. "Look," he whispered to Gyo, pointing.
"Why doesn't it run away? I've never seen a lizard like that before."
Karik stared in fascination. The lizard was bright green with a yellow tail, and seemed quite happy to perch on a shoulder as if it was just a cloth-covered rock. At that point, the boy turned, saw Karik watching, and gave him a wink and a big smile. He called something quickly in what Karik now knew to be Prijian, picked up the fruit and then strode off without a backward glance.
Karik looked at Gyo, who just shrugged. "Come on, lads," Risa called impatiently, walking on.
Karik hurried to catch up with the others, but the image of the strange boy, his bright smile and the pretty lizard stayed with him all morning.
By noon, Karik was glad to stop. Risa had shown them all the imposing buildings in Darshek, they'd walked past the public menagerie and the herbarium and the performance arenas and the theatre, and been promised a return visit to see inside each of them, had a long cool drink of fruit juice bought from a vendor, and been jostled by what seemed thousands of busy people.
Their route took them back to the Rulers' House where they were expected, and asked politely to wait. Karik was happy to sit – his feet were killing him. Besides, there were things to see even in this reception hall. The floor was inlaid with different coloured woods, making a picture of a mountain range – the Kislik range, he realised after studying it carefully. The walls were painted white, but there were many paintings hung on them – portraits, landscapes, even just a few smaller ones of flowers and birds. He could have happily spent all day just looking at them, but it was obvious that Misek and Risa thought he should sit quietly with them and not wander off.
A few minutes later Kei came in. "Ah, sorry, I got chatting to Bikel and forgot the time. Does Arman know you're here?"
"She said she would wait until you arrived," Risa said, nodding at the clerk.
"So she should, yes. Meris, can you tell Arman I've arrived?"
She nodded. "Of course, Kei." She walked off down one of the halls that Karik could see extending from the reception area.
"So, have you had fun? Seen everything? Worn the soles off your boots yet?" he added, tugging at Gyo's braid.
"I'm tired, Kei," Gyo said. "So many people."
"Yes, it's a bit overwhelming, I know. But it's only the centre of the city that's really crowded. Out on the edges, towards the farms, it's a lot more civilised. Most of the Rulers have their homes there, rather than here. Except for Lord Meki of course...."
"Ah, I thought I could hear you chattering," Arman said, smiling as he walked across to them, then greeted his lover with a kiss. "Have you been waiting long?"
"Just long enough for the lads to get their breath back," Misek said. "They're suffering from a little Darshekitis."
"That's what happens when village meets city," Kei explained with a grin. "Right, Arman – I'm starving. What have you laid on for us?"
"For you, nothing. For our guests, a fine feast. Come this way."
He took them out to the back of the building where there was a long verandah, and a table already set with a fine cloth and delicate pottery plates. As they sat down, two men brought trays of food to them – cold cooked fish which Karik had never tasted before, soup, bread, sliced cooked vegetables, and a bowl of quilo fruit. There were also some curious pastries, similar to those they had seen in the market. Karik's mouth began to water – he was hungry.
"I hope this is all right – it's the kind of lunch we give visiting officials from Kuprij," Arman said, breaking open a roll and spreading butter on it. "We have to leave the cheese out if it's for the Andonese, of course." Karik wondered why, but couldn't find the courage to ask.
"It's fine and you know it, Arman," Kei said. "Remind me to thank Lord Meki when I see him."
"And thank him for me too, Arman," Misek added. "Well, don't sit there staring, Gyo. It won't bite you."
Gyo grinned before applying himself enthusiastically to the food.
Karik was more circumspect. Arman was looking at him in a way that made him very nervous, and he was terribly afraid of appearing clumsy or rude. He let the others describe their morning to Kei, who told them more about things that were going on in the city at that moment, and urged Arman to describe the work he was doing to make the harbour safer and deeper, with better docking facilities for the cargo ships. Karik was fascinated by it all and happy to listen. No one seemed to mind that he didn't join in, although Kei looked at him a few times as if to encourage him to speak up. Arman didn't talk to him at all, although not in a way that made it seem he was ignoring Karik – more that Misek and Risa and Gyo had his full attention.
The food was delicious, although the fish took a little getting used to – the bread was the lightest he'd ever eaten, and the cheese, made from lemul milk, so Kei told them, tasted very different from ordinary cheese, but he decided he rather liked it. He wondered what lemuls looked like, and why they weren't raised on the plains. He would have to ask Kei later.
Finally, once they had devoured the wonderful pastries and eaten more quilo fruit, Arman wiped his lips and then pushed his plate away. "Well, enjoyable as this has been, I really do have to go back and do some work. Karik, I've got your birthday gift, if you'd like to come with me to collect it."
"A g-gift?" Karik had rather thought the meal had been that – but then that had been provided by the Rulers, he supposed. Then he caught Kei's look and realised that Arman wanted to have that talk.
Kei nodded as he saw Karik understand this. "Arman, why don't you have Karik taken over the academy when you're done, and I'll walk everyone else out?"
Gyo seemed worried at this change in plans, so Karik gave him a reassuring smile. "S-see you tonight, Gyo."
"Come on, son," Misek said, standing. "Risa needs to see Aito before tonight's tide."
"Let me show you the way out," Kei said. "Karik, when you get to the academy, tell them you're to see me. I'll make sure you're expected, but take your time."
Karik nodded, and stood politely as the others left. "It's this way," Arman said, opening the door back into the building and leading Karik down a long wide corridor, along which hung a series of portraits of solemn-faced men and women in red robes. Former Rulers, he supposed.
His stomach was churning by the time Arman got to a door at the very end of the corridor, and opened it. It was a small room, full of books. On a large desk, which took up a good deal of space in the room, were many papers and more books. "Have a seat, Karik."
Karik perched nervously on one of the chairs in front of the desk, while Arman took a seat behind it, opening a drawer and pulling something out. "Strictly speaking this is a gift by proxy, since I had to ask my father for help to obtain it. I hope you like it." He handed over a long object wrapped in oiled paper. Karik took it and unwrapped it carefully. There was a wooden box inside it – when the lid was removed, an odd looking metal tool was revealed, as well as a sealed pot and a thick, short handled brush. He looked at Arman in puzzlement.
"It's a razor," Arman said. "And good shaving soap. For your...." He indicated his own cheeks and top lip. "I know you don't need it now, but you will soon enough. After all, you're sixteen, nearly an adult," he added with forced heartiness.
Karik wondered why Arman was so ill at ease. "Th-thank you." He had absolutely no idea how to use a razor on himself. It looked nothing like what they used to prepare hides in the village with.
But Arman had thought of that, it seemed. "Before you go, I'll show you how it's done – don't want to spoil that fair complexion of yours, do we?" Karik nodded, but Arman still seemed as if he wasn't sure how to carry out this conversation.
Abruptly he stood up and walked to the window to stare out of it. He spoke without turning around. "I understand from Kei, who spoke to your mother, that you have some questions for me, so I've been thinking about what to say to you. I realise I could have handled this better sixteen years ago, but we can't cross that bridge again." He cleared his throat. "I understand your natural curiosity, and in your situation, I would feel the same. However, I'm dealing with a very difficult situation, and it's not just you who has to be considered. What I've decided is that I will tell you as much as I deem practical and wise, and then I will ask you not to seek more information than that – from me or from anyone. Will you give me that undertaking?" He turned then and looked at Karik.
"Y-yes," he said quietly. He hardly knew how to argue with the man – he wished he could just say he no longer really wanted the information at all. And the questions he did want answers to, he knew he would never have the courage to ask – not when Arman had this glint in his eye.
"Do I have your word of honour on this, Karik? What I give you now is all that you will seek?" Karik nodded, now feeling rather scared of Arman – he looked so serious. "Then I hope you keep that word, lad. There are dangerous forces at work here, you must not meddle with them."
He came and sat back at the desk, picking up a letter opener and beginning to fiddle with it. Karik had never seen him fidget before. "You are, as is perfectly obvious, a Prij by birth, although you are by law Darshianese and nothing will change that. Your birth mother...." He stopped and took a deep breath as if he was in pain. "Her name is Mayl, Sei Mayl, Sei meaning she's the daughter of a senator. I don't suppose you even know what a senator is."
"Ll-like a Ruh-Ruler?"
"Yes, a little. I'm also a senator's child. That class is the nobility among the Prij, although unlike the Rulers, the position isn't won by merit very often. My father is a rare example – he was the youngest son of a senator, but was made one in his own right because of his services to the present sovereign's father. However, my brother is now a senator in his stead on account of him being my father's oldest son. The position is inherited."
Karik nodded. "And my fah-father?"
"Other than the fact he is also a nobleman, I can't tell you about him, Karik." Arman grimaced. "I know that's not what you want to hear, but I won't be moved on this issue, so please don't ask me again."
"Wuh-was my m-mother r-raped? Like Pia?"
Arman shot him a sharp glance. "No, I assure you she wasn't. You're not the offspring of a crime, Karik, I can tell you that much. As for how you came into my keeping...." He stood up again and returned to the window. "Mayl's...affairs...were in my charge. I can't say more than that. I deemed it best for your welfare that you were not left in her care. I will say that, seeing the person you have grown up to be, I have never regretted that decision. Trust me, you're a better, happier person for being raised as Reji and Jena's child than you would be if I had left you in Utuk."
"She's...?"
Arman turned sharply, and Karik leaned back in his chair as if he were under physical threat, so ferocious did Arman seem just then. "No, don't ask me more, I beg you. You mustn't ask more about this, and you must not seek her out. Your parents' happiness depends on this, Karik, I swear on my honour. Your birth parents will do nothing but cause you harm, and more than that – harm to Reji and Jena, to Kei and even to me. Even to Darshian itself."
Karik couldn't speak, he was so shocked. He stared at Arman, who turned back to the window and refused to say any more for several minutes. But finally Arman sighed and returned to his desk. "I'm sorry, lad. I know that sounds rather dramatic. Your real parents are connected to very powerful, ill-motivated people, and I need you to put them out of your mind for everyone's sake. Nothing good will ever come from attempting to contact them, and knowing more about them will not bring you peace, however frustrating that is for you. I can only ask you to trust that I have your best interests at heart, though I know you may not believe it now. Are you happy in your life? Do you really wish I hadn't brought you north?"
Karik shook his head. "No. I ll-love M-Ma and Pa. I d-don't c-care about anyone else."
Arman smiled a little. "At least my conscience is eased on that score. Did Jena tell you about the man you were named for?"
"A l-little."
"So you know he was called Karus." Karik nodded. "It was Kei who suggested the name, Karik, but it was Karus who said I had a responsibility to make sure you were raised with love and joy. I wouldn't have been able to keep that promise if you had stayed in Kuprij." He smiled again, this time sadly. "Karus was my tutor, one of my dearest and oldest friends. A wonderfully wise man. I like to think he would be pleased at how you've turned out."
Karik opened his mouth to thank Arman, but then the door opened suddenly and a short, elderly man wearing the red robes of a Ruler came in. "Arman...oh, I do beg your pardon, Lodi said your visitors had left."
Karik stood, unsure of what was the correct thing to do. Arman also stood. "We are finished, pretty much. My lord, this is Karik. Karik, this is Lord Meki."
Karik bowed, it being the most polite thing he could think to do then. "How nice to meet you again, Karik," Lord Meki said. Again? Karik thought. "But don't let me disturb you, Arman...."
"I'll come to you in a few minutes, my lord. Just let me get Karik set on the way to the academy."
The Ruler nodded and left. "That's my boss," Arman said with a smile. "And it reminds me that I really must get back to my work. Have you any questions?"
Only a few thousand, Karik thought, even as he shook his head. "N-no. Thank you."
"You're welcome. Now, come with me and I'll have someone walk you to the academy. I know Kei has a gift for you too." Now the unpleasant topic of his parentage had been dismissed, Arman seemed more relaxed. "I think you'll find the academy fascinating – I always do. Some very bright people indeed work over there. Kei's the brightest, of course, but there are a few nearly as clever as him."
Karik made himself smile at Arman, sensing the man needed to see he was handling things well, though inwardly he was troubled, and even a little resentful that Arman hadn't seen fit to let him decide if he could handle the information. Still, he was glad this conversation was over. It had raised more questions than it had answered, but if Arman was telling the truth – and Karik had no reason to disbelieve him – to push for more would hurt his parents and that, Karik would never do. If being the son of an unknown man kept those he loved safe, it was a small price to pay. He just would have liked not to have that one question left unanswered.
Voyaging - Chapter 6
He politely thanked the soldier who had escorted him the short distance to the academy – he wished Arman hadn't thought he needed to be taken around like a child, but perhaps he'd thought it was just polite. Karik's thoughts were in a jumble. He couldn't make sense either of what he'd been told nor of what Arman said he wouldn't tell him – or the reasons. He wished he'd felt up to pushing Arman a little – he got the distinct impression that Arman was putting on a front to deter him and if Karik had been braver, he might have been able to force the truth from him – but the moment had passed now. He badly wanted to discuss the matter with his parents, but he would have to wait weeks and weeks for that now, he supposed.
The academy was a handsome building and Karik felt at home in it almost immediately, though he still felt rather depressed as he gave his name to the polite clerk and then sat to wait for Kei. He fiddled with the band on his wrist – his birthday was certainly turning out to be memorable, but for all the wrong reasons.
He didn't have long to wait – Kei arrived in just a few minutes, his expression grave. "Come with me," he said quietly, his hand on Karik's shoulder.
They had to climb two flights of stairs to get to Kei's office. "Sorry about this," he said. "I wanted a view and this was the only room they had spare that I liked. It's actually over the anatomy lecture room. Sometimes the smell in summer can get a bit much," he said, pulling a face. "Have a seat, Karik."
Kei's office was much larger and airier than Arman's, but also messier and busier. So many books, skulls, models, papers.... "H-how do you fi-find things?"
Kei laughed. "I have a system, believe it or not. It's just worse now because I've been looking things up for Jezinke in Urshek. Very clever man – I hope to meet him one day. Now," he said, leaning forward. "How did it go? With Arman, I mean. I can feel you're upset. Did he tell you who your parents are?"
"Muh-my mother. N-not my fuh-father. He s-said not to ah-ask about them."
"Ah." Kei looked thoughtful at that. "That's not very satisfactory for you, is it?" Karik shook his head and Kei sighed. "I'm sorry, Karik. Would it help for me to assure you that if Arman thinks your birth parents will only bring you sorrow, it's an opinion I share?"
"You kn-know them?"
"Yes." A look of pain crossed Kei's face, and Karik remembered what his father had said about Kei being mistreated during the war. "I don't know what I can say that will help. Arman really does have your best interest at heart and that of your parents. Can you believe that, at least?"
Karik nodded. "It's all r-right. I wuh-won't ask. I duh-don't want to hu-hurt Ma and P-Pa."
"I'm sure you don't. You're handling this very well, Karik, and I'm proud of you. I hope when you look back on this day, you won't judge Arman too harshly."
Somehow, with Kei respecting him as an adult, it was easier to react as one. "I wuh-won't. He wuh-wants to protect m-me. Us."
"Yes, he does," Kei said, looking a little sad. "And it's wise and generous of you to understand that."
Karik felt his face turning red. "Th-thanks."
"No need to thank me for telling the truth. Now. I suppose you think I forgot to get you a birthday gift, hmmm?"
Karik stared. It had crossed his mind briefly, but since Arman had given him such a generous present, he'd assumed it was from both of them. "No."
"Huh. Well, I didn't," he said, grinning, opening a drawer in his desk and pulling out a book. "Here, to encourage your discoveries."
Karik took it and read the title – The flora of South-east Darshian. He opened the pages, and was astonished at the beautifully coloured illustrations of flowers and plants, many of which were types he'd never seen before. As he flipped carefully but eagerly through the pages, he heard Kei laugh and he looked up.
"I'm sorry – I've never felt someone fall in lust with a book before. I take it you like it?"
He held it close to him. "Yes. Th-thank you."
"One day I hope you might contribute to a book on the plants of the plains. I certainly want to know if you find any of the plants in that book up near Ai-Albon. I need someone like you to work for me," Kei said with a sigh.
"Muh-me?"
"Yes, you, lad. A bright, thoughtful, sharp-eyed person is just who I need. Part of my job is spotting people who can serve this country in scientific investigation – I've spotted you now," he added, grinning. Karik was too surprised to speak. "However, I'm sitting here chatting when I'm sure you want to see the academy.... You did want to see it, yes? You weren't just being polite when you could have gone to see Aito's ship, I hope."
He looked really worried. "No. I ch-chose this. I've b-been looking f-forward to it."
Kei's expression cleared. "Oh good. Come and see the library, it was the thing I was most impressed with when I first came here."
Even though Kei had had no explanation or comfort to offer, somehow Karik just felt better for having talked to him. He even felt a little sorry for Arman – the older man had had such difficulty with the conversation for all his importance and experience, and had clearly been so worried about his reaction, no wonder he'd handled things so abruptly. Karik was actually proud of himself that he had been able to keep so calm. It would be all right, he thought. He knew he was a Prij, child of a noblewoman – but he was Jena and Reji's son first. And Kei was proud of him.
Karik kept his new treasures clutched tightly to him as they climbed down the long stairs and walked along tall, wooden-floored corridors. They passed several people in the hallways, all of whom bowed to Kei respectfully and called him 'Master'. After the third time this had happened, Karik looked at Kei, who seemed rather embarrassed. "It's just the title of my position," he murmured. "I always feel a little silly when they do that." Karik thought it was funny. No wonder his Pa teased Kei so much about his job. "Now, here we go."
They came to a pair of huge, heavy doors, which Kei pushed open with ease, despite their obvious weight. As they opened, Karik realised he had entered paradise. There were thousands of books all along the walls, and over a dozen people reading quietly, books open on tables and note books lying beside them. The ceiling was very tall and arched, and there were huge windows on all sides which would give light until the last rays of the sun disappeared. He walked into the centre of the room and turned around slowly – books everywhere. Knowledge everywhere.
Kei came to his side and put his hand on Karik's shoulder. "I know how you feel," he whispered. A woman reading close by, looked up with an annoyed expression, but when she saw who had spoken, she nodded and smiled, and turned back to her book. "When I first came in here, I never wanted to leave."
"No." But then Karik was sad. The academy was for professionals, healers, architects, engineers, teachers...not for children. "I wish I could stay," he murmured.
Kei signalled for Karik to follow him, and led him to a small office to the side of the reading room. "It's a quiet space for people looking at maps," he explained, resting his backside on a table. "You're in love, aren't you?" Karik nodded and Kei smiled. "Then I hope you'll come back here one day."
"I c-can't. I c-can't be a hee-healer wuh-with th-this st-st-stutter." He flushed with embarrassment at demonstrating his point so wonderfully.
Kei frowned. "Who says, Karik? Besides, I think we can find an answer to help you speak more clearly – I notice when you slow down, or you whisper, you don't stammer. It's not a physical flaw, therefore I think there must be an answer. " Karik nodded. "Well, then. We just need to find out more about it. But be that as it may, Karik, you can be a healer with a stammer, I promise you – if you want to be. Do you?"
"Not...sure." He'd tried saying it slower and it was true, he didn't stammer.
"You have time to decide. But it's not the only kind of work you could do which can help the health of the Darshianese. You've already discovered a powerful fungicide, and that was without any training and just looking in your small locality. The plants of the dry areas are barely exploited. We don't even know what we have, not far to the west, or in the mountains. We already have people doing surveys, but it needs more than willingness, and it won't be something that we can do quickly." He put his hand on Karik's shoulder and looked down at him kindly. "By the time you're ready to come back, if you want to, you can help in that work. We need people who are careful, learned and brave. I think you're all three. It would mean travelling, going a long way from home. Do you think you could bear it?"
Karik looked up at his 'uncle'. "I d-don't know. I'd ll-like to t-try."
"I thought you might. So here's what I need you to do, Karik. Study hard, keep your eyes open, keep notes – all which you do now. I'll speak to Jena and make sure she trains you as if you are to be a healer and more besides. I know you've already picked up a good deal just by helping her and talking to her, and I know she believes you have a natural aptitude or I wouldn't suggest this at all. In a year, if you're still interested, come back to me, and you can study here. And after all that, you can either go home to work as a healer, or stay and work with me. How does that sound?"
Karik could only stare. "R-really? Me?"
"Of course. Reji has a mind like yours. You've picked up his curiosity, his good sense, but also Jena's eye for the odd and the new. If Jena hadn't wanted to be a village healer so badly, she could be doing my job, and a lot better than me too," he said with a grin. "And your father is the smartest man I know. To have his son work with me would be an honour."
Karik wanted to say that since he wasn't really Reji's son, Kei would be getting a poor deal, but with Kei's kind, smiling eyes turned on him, how could he? Besides, Kei already knew all that. "I'll tr-try."
"Good, that's all I want. Would you like to see the anatomy lecture room? I think we've got rid of all the smelly bits, though I don't suppose that bothers you."
Over the next couple of hours, he was taken to lecture rooms and work rooms, shown where experiments were being carried out, and led through the infirmary where particularly difficult medical cases were dealt with, and where healers were trained. Everywhere men and women – Darshianese, Prijian and Andonese – were hard at work, learning, seeking answers, investigating – and Karik badly wanted to be one of them. Some seemed barely older than he was, but what they all had in common was their serious intent, the air of studiousness that clung to each one. Kei was greeted with affection wherever he went, clearly respected and loved. Karik felt proud to be seen in his company.
Kei finally took him out to the large gardens, which, while laid out in a formal, artistic manner, contained plants of considerable medical importance from many parts of Darshian and neighbouring countries. Kei lectured him in his familiar, gentle manner about the uses and growing habits of each they looked at, and Karik wondered how he could remember it all.
Finally, Kei led him to a bench that looked out over the harbour. "Well, do you like what you see?"
He nodded. "V-very much. I wuh-want it. Wuh-want to stay."
Kei grinned. "Yes, I felt like that too. But I was so homesick too.... And then my parents died, six months after I got here. I didn't finish my training for over three years. When I came back, Meki wanted me to help promote and develop the academy. And then we never left," he said with a little shrug.
"S-still homesick?"
"Yes, sometimes. Lots of times, actually. Going home helps, of course. Seeing you lads too, of course. It's something to consider, certainly, if you accepted my offer. It would be hard, leaving home, and I wouldn't want anyone to suffer as I did...." He took a deep breath and gave Karik a bright, slightly forced smile. "Not that you would be forced to leave. If you chose to stay, Karik, you could still do a lot for us. I would want you to, regardless. I just want you to know you have a choice. I know Reji and Jena would want you to develop to the best of your potential. That's all any parent would want."
Karik wondered if his real mother would have felt that way. Kei of course noticed his shift in mood. "I didn't tell you that my gift to you is in two parts," he said gently. "And here comes the second part now."
Confused, Karik looked in the direction Kei was pointing. A woman was coming towards them with a shy smile on her face. Kei got up and kissed her cheek. "Hello, Neka. Karik, this is Neka, one of our Gifted mind-speakers and my dear friend."
Karik stood hastily and bowed deeply. He heard her laugh and looked up. "You're more polite than your father, Karik. Don't bow to me, it makes me feel old."
"I'm s-sorry."
"Neka, don't tease," Kei said, shaking his head at her. "Karik, I'm sure you've heard Jena mention Neka – and we've arranged for you to be able to speak to your mother and father. They're waiting for you now."
"Huh? R-really?" Of all the things Karik had wanted today, this was the one he'd wanted above all others. "N-now?"
"Yes, now," Neka said, taking his hand and indicating he should sit. Jena? He's here.
Karik? How are you, dear?
Karik started – he almost expected to see his Ma standing in front of him, for all that mind-speaking was hardly new to him. I'm fine – is Pa all right?
Of course I am, Karik. Karik grinned, but then he gasped as he did suddenly seem to be right there with his parents, actually seeing them. Pa was grinning at him. I see you don't look much different at sixteen than you did at fifteen, he teased.
"How...?" He turned to look at Kei, who was sitting right next to him.
"Neka is a little more powerful than your mother," Kei said. "Just enjoy it, Karik."
Neka patted his hand. Just behave as if you're there with them. They can see you as if you were too.
Are you having a good birthday, dear? What have you been doing, and how did the trip go?
Without having to worry about his stammer, it was so easy to tell Ma everything, including what had happened with the Ai-Kislik traders. He 'saw' his parents' eyes fill with worry, and how his Pa put his arms around Ma's waist. Are you still upset, Ka-chi? I'm sorry, I never thought to tell you about these things because I never thought you would need to know.
It's all right, Ma. I understand. But... they said Arman killed a boy?
Yes...I don't suppose you asked him. Karik shook his head. Karik, when you get home, we'll talk. Properly. But it might be best not to mention it to Arman. It's a very painful subject.
I understand. Ma...he told me about.... He couldn't say his 'mother' because the woman he'd learned of was hardly that. About Mayl.
Ah. And your father?
He wouldn't tell me who he was. He told me not to go asking questions either.
What did he say exactly, Ka-chi?
Neka nudged him. "I can show them exactly, if you like."
He nodded, and then he found he was remembering the conversation with Arman – from the looks on his parents' faces, they were seeing it as he had. I see, his mother said with a tight-lipped expression. How do you feel?
All right. Kei helped. He wondered if Kei could hear all of this.
He can't, Neka said suddenly. He can only sense your emotions as he normally can. You have privacy, Karik, I promise.
It didn't really matter, he supposed, he'd just felt awkward talking about Arman in front of his lover. Ma, I'm not mad at Arman.
I know, dear. I understand why he's done things this way, but I know it's not what you were hoping for. I hope you won't let it ruin your visit. We miss you terribly, you know.
I miss you. He found his eyes were getting scratchy, but then he felt arms being put around him from either side, almost as if his parents were hugging him. Even though he knew it was just Neka and Kei, it made him feel better.
You'll be home soon. Now, tell us what you're doing tomorrow.
He spent another few minutes chatting to them, Kei and Neka's arms still comfortingly around him, and it eased the deep ache of homesickness in him that he had carried since he'd left his village. He wondered if he could ever take up Kei's suggestion, since being away for this short time had hurt so much, and hearing his parents' voices made him certain he could never leave them again.
It was his Ma, finally, who suggested they should stop. Neka's a busy woman, dear, and Kei will have things to do.
I can let you talk to them again before you go, Neka added. If you ever need to talk to them urgently, I can hear you anywhere in Darshek.
So there you go, son, his Pa said. You enjoy the rest of your birthday and the rest of the visit, and you'll be home in under four weeks. It won't take as long to come back, and if this harridan you call a mother lets me, I might even ride out and meet you half-way.
Karik saw his Ma give Pa a smack for that comment, and he grinned. I'd like that, Pa. Are you sure you're all right?
My ribs are still sore and my leg aches a bit, but I'm walking fine. By the time you get back, you won't ever know I was injured.
If you stop pushing yourself and moving hay bales without help, his Ma said.
Pa!
Yes, tell him, Karik, he won't listen to me. Damn stubborn bastard.
Language, you old hag, Pa said, winking at Karik. Off you go, son, and give my love to Kei. I'll be up before the summer to plague him.
I will. I love you, Pa, Ma.
And we love you, son, his Ma said. We'll speak later. Thank you, Neka.
Anytime, Jena. He's a good boy, your son.
The vision of his parents disappeared, and Karik blinked. He was still being held by his companions. "Well, did you enjoy that?" Kei asked.
"Yes. Th-thank you, Neka."
She squeezed him and then let him go. "It really was no trouble. I know how much Jena misses you. We talk all the time – she's so proud of you. You were such a pretty baby, and now you're a fine man."
"Y-you saw me?"
"Neka came with Arman and the others to help rescue the hostages, including your Ma," Kei explained. "In fact, without her, we'd never have done it. She was on the ship when Arman brought you back."
"I haven't seen you since," Neka said, patting his hand, "but your mother tells me all about you, so I feel like I know you. It's nice to meet you again, though."
"A-again – L-Lord Meki s-said that."
"Oh, Meki was with us too," Neka said. "Lots of us were. The big adventure, right, Kei?"
"In a way," Kei said with a smile. "Thank you, Neka. I thought to bring Karik and the others to visit in a few days, before they go. Do you think the others would mind?"
"Meda will kill you if you don't," she said, grinning. "But I better get back – Jera will fuss. I'll see you tomorrow, Kei."
He nodded and then she walked off across the grass. "D-does she l-listen all the t-time?"
"Well, technically, she does – she can hear anyone, any time, at least in Darshek plain, and a good distance beyond with the help of other mind-speakers. But she doesn't really listen – it's more background noise. If she wants to hear something or someone, she concentrates. Those of us she knows personally can 'hail' her if we think loudly enough. Don't worry," Kei said, putting a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "She's perfectly discreet – she knows everything about everyone, but you'd never hear it from her lips. She would never share anything she hears with another without consent either, any more than your mother would. Neka's a remarkable woman – all of the Gifted are. I'm sure you'll like them."
Karik was rather overawed by the idea of meeting more of these strange people. He was also feeling a little shaky emotionally, but before he could even decide how to hide it, Kei hugged him close, just holding him until he felt calmer. "Big day," Kei murmured. "You don't have to feel like you have to carry it all on your own shoulders, Karik. Your family is more than your parents. I'm still your uncle, aren't I?"
"Y-yes, uncle Kei."
Kei chuckled. "I really don't know what's worse, being called 'master' or being called 'uncle', but I like it, in a funny kind of way. Right. Let's walk the long way back to the house, and I can show you a few things. We don't want to be late back – Pira is making you a special meal and she's a wonderful cook."
Kei closed the washroom door behind them, and then turned to Arman. "Well, do you want to tell me why you've been radiating guilt all evening, or do I have to guess it's to do with your little chat with Karik?"
Arman grimaced. "I made a bit of a mess of things, Kei. I'm sorry. I just couldn't tell him about Mekus, or Mayl being my wife – I couldn't. Bringing them into his life...or Reji and Jena's.... I don't know what they'll think, though."
Kei took over unlacing Arman's shirt for him. "I think they'll understand in time," he said gently, skimming his hands up Arman's side. "Karik doesn't hold it against you, if that's what's been worrying you." He cupped Arman's face and kissed him. "He says he knows you're only trying to protect his family."
Arman pulled away, unwilling to be praised on this. "Why does it hurt so much after all this damn time? Every time I think...think of her, him – I feel like I want to vomit. Why?"
Kei pulled him close again. "You tell me. Are you angry? Ashamed? Feel betrayed? Do you wish it had turned out differently...."
"No! That's the one thing I don't want." He pulled away again and went to the wall so he could lean on it, his arms folded around him. "I don't know. Shame is some of it, shame at my failure.... Some of it is fear of what they might do. I shouldn't have told anyone about Karik, too many people know about Mayl and Mekus and it's dangerous," he said in all seriousness.
"You could have hardly concealed a Prijian child from us, Arman, and the questions and speculation would have been even worse. At least enough people know the truth and the reason for discretion. What else could you have done with him? Left him with Mayl?"
"Gods, no. But I could have given him to Mari. She would have been good for him, look how she raised Loke...."
"Yes, that could have been an option, but would she have derived the joy that Jena did? And his status as an 'orphan' or adopted child in Utuk would have been far more prejudicial than in Ai-Albon."
"Yes, I know and if I'm honest, this is much less about him than me, which only proves how selfish I am."
Kei came to him and put his arms around him. "Arman, you are the least selfish person I know, have ever known. I could wish you to be more selfish, in fact."
Arman rested his head on his lover's shoulder, grateful for his love, not sure he deserved it. "I spoke to Meki today – he's going to ask approval to put my name forward – and he's agreed to all I asked. I, uh, asked him to stay on though." He felt Kei draw breath to argue with him. "No, wait, not to work – but to keep an interest. The man will be dead in a month if you force him back to his farm. I know the type – damn it, I'm the same. We both need to be stimulated, and watching fruit ripen isn't enough for him. He hasn't got you to keep his mind alive, Kei."
Kei looked at him seriously. "Arman, his condition is grave. He's done what he can with diet and medicine, but the main thing is the workload. He needs to rest and learn to relax or he's going to die in a very short time."
"Yes, I know, but he can do that and still keep an interest in the country's affairs. I promise to be a lot more active in making him take it easy, starting from tomorrow. You didn't hear him, how...empty...he sounded. What he's done for Darshian is a magnificent thing – he's a good man, Kei, for all you don't like him...."
"I do like him – he's just pushy sometimes."
"Hmmm, so are you when you want something. He's convinced you dislike him. I find that sad."
"Then we shall have to do something about that," Kei said firmly. "But right now, I want you to calm down too. What's done is done. Maybe in a few years you might be able to talk to Karik again – I think I might have convinced him to come back to Darshek and study when he's older. Mekus really can't hurt you, or us, not with the protection of the Rulers. Mayl might be his wife now, but she's powerless – you protected me from her spite even in Utuk. What can she do here?"
"I don't know. It's probably irrational, I grant you that, it's just what my instincts tell me. Look, will you apologise to the lad for me? Say...in a few years, or even when he comes back, we'll speak again. You can tell him what a damn fool you have for a lover."
Kei tapped him on the nose. "I have no such thing. But I'll speak to him, perhaps in a couple of days. Today was rather overwhelming for him. Let him get his feet back under him, and I'll plan it so he can talk to his parents again afterwards." He kissed Arman's cheek. "Don't be so hard on yourself."
Arman let Kei comfort him because frankly, he needed it, and to make love to him, to reassure himself that his life was sound and not under threat from his past. But that night, as Kei lay asleep in his arms, he wished he hadn't told Karik as much as he had. If he were Karik, the little he had learned would only make him more curious. Perhaps Kei was right, and he should offer to give the boy the full story in a year or so, if he would wait.
He wondered now why he hadn't thought to give Karik to Mari. He knew that she would have taken the baby without a moment's hesitation. Certainly his parentage would have meant nothing to her, but it would have meant something to Arman's father and been as difficult to put aside as it would have been for Arman itself. Though it might have eased Mari's grief, it was undeniable that Karik had brightened two lives by being taken to Ai-Albon. The question was whether Karik himself would have been happier to have been left in Kuprij, but it was now too late to unmake that decision.
Arman kissed his lover's hair. Such a wise and kind man and so tolerant to put up with him. He was the one who should be made a Ruler. Arman was selfish enough to be glad the job wasn't going to be offered to him, but that didn't blind him to the fact that Kei was the better man. He would just have to try to give his best to Darshian, to make up for what they would not get from Kei.
It wasn't until the following day that Karik had any time alone with Gyo. They had gone to the market with Pira, since Misek and Risa were going to be busy all day and had left at dawn. Karik and Gyo stayed with Pira until she was done, and then she said they didn't need to return with her – they could stay and go to the public menagerie as they planned to do, as her food purchases would be delivered with the jombeker milk that was coming that afternoon. "Now, boys, Kei gave me some money to give you to buy lunch with. So you can stay all day if you like, but make sure you're home before sunset. You know the way now, but if you get lost, ask a soldier for Master Kei's house. They all know him. If you have any trouble at all, give Arman's name and Lord Meki's. Arman told me to tell you that specially. But you're not to get into trouble," she said, wagging a finger at them. "Your parents trust you to behave and so do Kei and Arman. Don't let them down."
"No, Pira," they chorused. Kei had explained how the streets were laid out on a grid, and shown them a map. The inner part of the city wasn't that big, and he'd told them that provided they kept away from the inns on the docks, and were careful who they spoke to, they would be fine. He'd given them the name of a Captain Tiko to ask for if they needed to get a soldier to help them urgently. It sounded like everyone who was anyone in Darshek would help Kei or any friend of Kei's if he needed it. Karik was beginning to realise his uncle was probably almost as important as any Ruler and easily as respected.
Pira gave them the coins, patted them on the head and then left them. The public menagerie wasn't that far from the market so they headed that way. The minute they had privacy, Gyo was wild to know what had happened with Arman. Karik had been debating whether he should tell his friend anything – but Arman hadn't said to keep it secret, only not to ask any more questions. He figured it was probably all right to tell Gyo about his mother. When he was done, Gyo's eyes were huge with amazement. "So you're a noble?"
"I g-guess so. Ll-like Ah-Arman."
"But it doesn't make sense he can tell you about her and not him. Pa says the Prij are really funny about their women, and they have all kinds of strange ideas like thinking nakedness is wrong. He never said anything about the men, though." His expression suddenly cleared. "I think I know!"
"Wuh-what?"
"Well, Arman's a noble, and your mother's one – and he said he had control of her affairs – she must be his sister!"
Karik stared at his friend dumbfounded. "You th-think s-so?"
"See, it all fits," he said eagerly. "She has to be someone close to him, and someone he's in charge of. Pa says that the Prijian women aren't allowed to look after their own business, that they always need a brother or a father or someone like a husband to do it for them."
"R-really?"
"Yes. So I think Arman must be her brother – he can't be her father, and how could he be her husband? He'd have you himself if he was. So maybe...she married someone he didn't like and he died or something and so Arman took you away from her."
"M-maybe." That sounded rather implausible to Karik. "H-he doesn't ll-like her m-much."
"Well, maybe she's his brother's wife, not his sister. I think it's mean of him not to tell you, Ka-chi. You should ask him again."
Karik shook his head. "He s-said no. I d-don't wuh-want to hu-hurt M-Ma and P-Pa."
"But how can it hurt them?"
"D-don't know. B-but I pr-promised. D-don't m-make me br-break that."
"I won't, Ka-chi," Gyo said in a hurt voice. "Don't you mind, though?"
Karik shook his head. "I did. N-not now. N-not important."
"If you say so." Gyo sounded doubtful, but he let the matter drop.
The theory he'd put forward occupied Karik's thoughts for a little while, but when they came to the public menagerie, he forgot about it in the excitement of hearing the sounds of wild animals from within. The attendant collected the small fee from them, giving Karik several smaller coins in return for a rina, and then ushered them inside.
There had been a menagerie on the spot for a hundred years or so, Kei had told them, for public amusement and to store gifts and oddities brought to the Rulers. But more recently, the academy was using it to see what animals from other lands could be made to breed and live successfully in Darshian. There was a similar one set up in the south, he said. Karik had little idea what to expect.
What they got were cages of birds and animals set in a rather pretty garden. Fully-grown carchos prowled back and forth behind the bars, and other fierce looking predators that Karik had never heard of, let alone seen before. There were people of all races looking at the beasts – he guessed that maybe the Andonese or the Prij might have some idea about what they were, but he didn't know how to ask them.
"Look, there's that boy again," Gyo said, tugging on Karik's sleeve.
He looked, and so it was – the Prijian boy was crouched in front of a cage of brightly coloured songbirds, making whistling noises at them and feeding them bits of fruit from his pocket. Karik and Gyo watched him for a few minutes, until he stood and turned. He saw them and to Karik's surprise, seemed to recognise them. He grinned and walked over to them, saying something in Prijian. "I'm s-sorry, I d-don't speak it," Karik explained.
The boy did a double take. "Really? Sorry – I'm Jembis." He held out his hand and they each shook it politely. "But you must be Prijian. What's your name?"
"K-Karik. This is G-Gyo."
Jembis cocked his head. "Hmmm, 'Karik' doesn't sound Prijian, but you don't look Darshianese."
"Karik's adopted – his parents are really Prijian, but he lives in Ai-Albon. Where's your lizard?"
Karik wished Gyo had kept his mouth shut, but it was too late. "He's back on the ship, I didn't want him eaten," Jembis said with a grin. "Adopted? I never heard of any Darshianese adopting a Prijian boy before. Did they steal you from your mother or something?"
"No!" Karik said, now really irritated.
"Well?"
"He doesn't know," Gyo said helpfully. "We know who his Ma is, but not his Pa."
"S-shut up, Gyo," Karik snapped. "It's nuh-none of his b-business."
"Sorry," Jembis said, and looked it. "I don't want to cause a fight between you. So why are you in Darshek if you live in Ai-Albon?"
This was less contentious ground and Gyo was happy to explain. "His Pa and my uncle are traders, only his Pa got hurt so my Pa came up with uncle Risa, and we're helping them."
"Oh, so it's your first time in Darshek? Do you like it?"
"Y-yes. Y-you live h-here?"
"No, not really. I don't live anywhere – my father owns a ship and we travel up and down the coast taking cargo. Right now he's buying animals for nobles in Utuk – I'm the one who has to look after them on the journey."
Gyo's eyes were big. "Really? What animals?"
"Oh, we have tuktuks and little birds, some tewi cubs...."
"T-tewi?"
He pointed at a cage where a dark red-furred animal with huge claws was walking back and forth, snarling at the visitors. "That's a tewi – they come from Andon. Really fierce. We're only taking the cubs, and some carcho kittens. I've been taming them, hand feeding them. They take a lot of work."
"I'd love to do something like that," Gyo said with a sigh. "All I ever do is look after plants."
"Well, why don't you come along to our ship and I'll show you."
"On a ship? Karik, do you think it would be all right?"
Karik's instinct was to say no – they didn't know this boy at all, and they'd been told to keep away from the inns on the dock. "You kn-know what Mi-Misek said. N-no inns."
"But it's just a ship, like Aito's – I went there yesterday and it was fine," Gyo argued.
"You'll be safe enough – we don't need to go near the inns," Jembis said. "We're leaving soon so it's your last chance – we don't trade wild animals that often and you'll be going home, I guess."
"Please, Karik?"
His instincts still wanted to refuse, but Gyo's life was so dull, and this was his adventure as much as Karik's. It wasn't his place to deny Gyo just on instinct. And Karik would like to see young tewis. "All ri-right. J-just for an hour. B-but I wuh-want to see the m-men-menagerie."
"Sure!" Now Gyo had his agreement, he was all smiles again. "Jembis, do you know what these animals are?"
It turned out that Jembis was very knowledgeable about animals from all over Periter – while his father only carried them occasionally, they had many friends who were animal traders and hunters. He always visited the menagerie when their ship was in port. He knew how the collection had been built and why there were young animals in some of the cages, clearly born in the menagerie itself. "They never used to breed them at all, but they decided it was cheaper if they could, and the visitors like to see the babies too. They had to build bigger cages though – these are the old ones, the bigger ones are over there."
Karik, who had found the small dark cages they'd seen up to then rather distressing, was pleased at the larger enclosures. One of the carchos had two half grown kittens with her, while her mate prowled protectively at the front of the cage. "He's huge," Gyo said, sounding awed.
"He's overfed," Jembis said dismissively. "He was one of the first ones they ever bred here. I remember seeing him the first time I came here. She's wild caught, though. They haven't had any luck with the tewis – we still have to get cubs from the wild."
"The m-mother?"
"Well, they have to kill her to take the cubs," he explained. At their look of horror, he shrugged. "It's the only way – full-grown tewis are just too dangerous to try and catch – you can drug the babies once you catch them, but the adults are impossible. All the ones you see here were caught the same way, as cubs, and raised in the menagerie. Maybe that's what happened to you, Karik – your mother was too dangerous and they took you off her." Karik scowled, not caring for the joke at all.
"His Ma's a noble, Arman said. I think she's Arman's sister."
"G-Gyo!"
"It's all right, Karik, I won't say anything. A noble, huh? Is she rich?"
"Arman's Pa is rich," Gyo said.
"Gyo, th-that's enough. Wuh-we d-don't know she's his s-sister."
"Sounds like this Arman is keeping a lot of secrets from you, Karik – are you sure you trust him? Maybe he's trying to keep your inheritance from you, if your mother's family are rich."
Karik turned to glare at both of them. "I d-don't want to t-talk about it. I-I-if you k-keep it uh-up, I'll ll-leave."
Gyo took his arm. "I'm sorry, Ka-chi. I won't mention it again."
"Don't get all upset, Karik, it's just talking. Come on, they've got pesquils over there, and I love watching them getting fed."
Karik was too cross with his friend and their new companion to enjoy watching the lively pesquils at first, but Gyo was so eager to placate him, and the little birds were so funny with their antics and squabbling, that he felt his bad mood dissipating. It helped that Jembis had stopped talking about his family and was instead regaling them with tales of a pet pesquil he had as a child. As they walked away from the cages, Gyo asked Jembis, "So does your mother live on the ship too?"
"No, my mother died when I was three. My father never remarried – he's got a woman in Utuk we stay with, but I don't like her," he said with a scowl.
"So you don't have any brothers or sisters?"
"No. Just me and my father."
Karik, who had still been feeling rather annoyed at Jembis, now was a little sorry for him – at least Karik had always had two parents to love and protect him. Maybe this was the explanation as to why the older boy was so fascinated by his history. He didn't seem to be malicious, just curious, and he had been very amiable the way he'd taken the time to show the menagerie and explain the habits of the animals. He seemed very eager to be friends with them, as if his life was lacking in companionship.
The menagerie itself wasn't very large, but by the time they had seen all the animals, and Jembis had told them all about each species, it was well past noon, and both Karik and Gyo were hungry. Jembis said he knew the best pie seller in Darshek, and certainly the hot pastries were very good. That and a big piece of melon they bought from another stall allayed hunger pangs and their thirst. It had begun to drizzle, so the plan of visiting Jembis' ship now seemed a good idea. They got a lift to the docks on a cart carrying bean sacks, and in a few minutes were let off near where the tall ships were being loaded with cargo. "That's ours," Jembis said, pointing.
The ship was somewhat smaller than others waiting at the dock, but Gyo was still very taken with it. "When I'm older, I want to sail a ship," he said. "Just once, maybe to Urshek."
"Maybe y-you'll get ss-seasick," Karik said to tease him.
"Don't be mean, Ka-chi. Jembis, do you get sick?"
"Sometimes, but I just take some nerf leaf and just sleep it away. It's only if there's really bad weather."
"N-nerf leaf?"
"It grows in Andon – the animal traders use it to keep their catches quiet while they're moving them about. It makes them sleepy if they eat it. Some of the sailors smoke it but it makes a horrible stink. Father won't let them do that on board."
Karik nodded, making a note to mention it to Kei when he saw him that evening. It wasn't something his mother had ever mentioned so perhaps it was new to them both.
There were only a couple of men on deck who waved to Jembis as they came up the gangway. He let Karik and Gyo look around a little but seemed eager to get them below deck. "We don't want to be in the way when the last cargo is loaded. Besides, I need to feed the tewi cubs, and put water in with the birds."
Fascinating as the boat was, Karik was much more excited by the idea of seeing the infant tewis. He could smell the animals before they came down the stairs to the lower deck, and hear the mewing and growling of baby carnivores. Jembis called to his charges quietly, soothing them with his voice. "There's a couple of rich nobles in Utuk who want tame tewis and carchos in their gardens. I think they're crazy, but they're paying so we just do what they want. I just get them used to me handling them so they don't attack humans. They think I'm their mother," he joked.
There were jombekers in the hold to provide food for the babies, and Jembis got them to help him milk three of the she-animals. To Karik's delight, he was allowed to hand feed one of the tewi cubs – its eyes were still blue, but its teeth were very sharp even at such a young age. Somehow he didn't think the idea of a fully grown tewi or carcho wandering loose sounded very sensible, even a so-called tame one, but the cubs and kits were cute and affectionate, very greedy for the milk and scraps of meat.
Not long after they started the long task of feeding the animals, there were loud shouts from up on deck, and the boat shuddered, much to Karik and Gyo's alarm. Jembis assured them it was just the boat shifting as it was loaded and said that as long as they kept below deck, they'd be fine. "I usually just hide down here until it's all done, otherwise I get asked to lift stuff," he said, winking at them.
As they worked, he started to speculate in a general way about Karik's Prijian past. Karik tried to be polite, not wanting to interrupt the enjoyable time they were otherwise having by telling Jembis to shut up, but the conversation made him uncomfortable, even though Jembis wasn't actually asking him for more information. The older boy finally seemed to pick up on his discomfort, and changed the subject. Karik really wished Gyo had kept his mouth shut, and resolved to have a word with his friend when they left the ship. He was sure Arman would be cross if he knew the history of Karik's birth was being spread about.
They spent easily two hours feeding the animals, admiring the birds, helping Jembis clean the cages and putting oil on the feet of some of the tuktuks and other birds. The whole time the boat rocked and swayed, but they were getting used to the movement and after a while Karik ceased to note it. Jembis said it was normal, and seemed unconcerned.
However, it was probably getting late. "Wuh-we should g-go," he said, handing back the last bird to Jembis.
"If you like, but have some tea before you go? It's Andonese – you won't have had it before. I've got some cakes too."
Gyo seized on the idea enthusiastically. "We've got time for that, Karik. I'm thirsty."
Karik nodded – a little delay would do no harm, so long as they got back soon. "Good," Jembis said with a bright smile. "Here, keep playing with these, they need to get as used to people as they can, and to handling. I won't be long – I just need to go to the galley."
As Jembis left, Gyo explained with his superior experience from Aito's ship, that the galley was the ship's kitchen. "Maybe we can have a look around before we go? They must have finished the cargo loading by now."
Karik was bothered by something. "The boat's still moving."
"Aito's ship bobbed up and down too. Not like this, but this is a smaller boat, so that's probably why."
Karik accepted the explanation, because he had no knowledge of such matters. Still, the longer they were on the ship, the more anxious he was to go. He was beginning to feel very sorry for the animals in their little cages, and worried about the fate of the tewi in his lap. It was one thing to take its chances in the forests of Andon, but to be a plaything for a rich man, and maybe ending up shot by an archer when it became too dangerous – it seemed wrong to him. Carchos belonged in the open spaces too. He decided he really didn't like zoos or cages, not unless there was a reason other than entertainment.
Jembis was only a matter of minutes. "I hope you like it sweet – the flavour's very strong but it's good with honey. Sailors swear by it," he said with a wink, handling them metal mugs and setting down a sack of cakes which the baby tewi Karik was holding immediately wanted. Jembis picked it up by the scruff of its neck and wagged a finger in its face. "Don't be greedy, you just had your milk. Come on, drink up, Gyo. Then you can tell your Pa you're a real sailor."
Gyo took a gulp and then coughed. "Oh.... It's strong."
"Only way to drink it – have a cake with it."
Karik sipped his – it was pungent, not entirely pleasant, but it tasted better than it smelled. With the sweet cakes, it wasn't bad, but it wasn't something he was keen to try again. "N-not h-having any?"
"I could only carry two mugs," Jembis said with a shrug. "I'll have some when you go – there's always some in a pot in the galley."
He urged them to eat more of the cakes, and to finish the big mugs of tea. When they were done, he took the mugs from them. "Oh, I forgot I have to show you the lizard."
Gyo stood, and immediately sat down again. "I feel dizzy," he muttered.
Karik went to help him, but he felt as if the ground was no longer solid under his feet. "We need to go," he said slowly, his tongue feeling thick in his mouth. The tea seemed to have numbed it.
"Maybe you're feeling a little seasick from the rocking. Come and sit on the haystack for a minute," Jembis said.
"No, wuh-want fr-fresh air...." Karik swayed, and would have fallen except for Jembis catching him.
"Karik!" Gyo cried as Jembis helped Karik over to the sacks of straw.
Karik wanted to reassure him but he found he could hardly speak or keep his eyes open. "Drug...."
"No, seasickness. Just rest."
He struggled to open his eyes, to glare at Jembis. "Tea...drug...."
"Just take it easy, boys," Jembis said and the next minute, Gyo was lying next to Karik.
"Scared...." Gyo whispered in a slurred voice.
"You'll be fine. I'll go get my father."
That was the most reassuring thing Jembis had said. Karik had to close his eyes again because the hold was swirling around him. His limbs felt heavy and he couldn't even seem to move his fingers. He knew this had to be a drug, but right then, he couldn't bring himself to care. All he wanted to do was curl up and sleep.
Voyaging - Chapter 7
It was the cold that woke him up, but even though he knew immediately that he was far from safe, he found it hard to make his limbs obey him. He realised he was still suffering from the after-effects of a drug, but that same drug seemed to be muting the anger and worry that he knew he was feeling, albeit distantly. It was dark, wherever they were, but there was the golden glow of a lamp to his left. He turned his head, and saw the familiar outline of Gyo's head. Karik made himself lift his arm and push feebly at Gyo's shoulder. "Wuh-wake up." His voice sounded all slurred, his tongue feeling too large in his mouth. "Gyo...."
He kept pushing and calling his friend's name until he got a grunt and a mumbled complaint. "Go 'way."
"Gyo, wuh-wake up.
It seemed to take forever, but finally Gyo flopped over. "Oh...pissing hell." Bigger than Karik, or maybe just naturally better able to flush whatever the hell it was out of his system, he seemed a little more alert, sitting up slowly, and helping Karik do the same. "Wha...Jembis! Where are we?"
"Ship." Karik felt quite woolly headed, but he knew he had to wake up more than he was. Jembis had drugged them for a reason and until they knew what it was, and how they could get out of this situation, it was very dangerous. "Come on."
Gyo helped him get to his feet, but Karik found it hard to stay on them. He gulped back the sudden nausea and took several deep breaths to try and clear his head. Gyo began to haul him bodily towards the stairs, but suddenly bright light filled the hold, making them both shade their eyes. A shadow blocked the light. "Oh, you're awake."
Karik squinted. Jembis actually sounded relieved. "Wh-what did you do to us?"
"Nothing! Just...some nerf leaf in your tea – it's harmless," he said hastily as Gyo raised his fist. Karik forced himself to straighten up.
"Why?" Gyo demanded.
"It was just a joke," Jembis said, less than convincingly. "You're not sick or anything, are you?"
"No, but you will be if I get my hands on you," Gyo said, surging forward.
Karik managed to restrain him, sensing that it was better for them to just get out of here and away from this erratic boy who was looking at them with a mixture of concern and puzzlement, as if he really couldn't understand why they were angry. Clearly, there was something broken in Jembis' head, but it wasn't Karik's problem and the sooner he was away from them, and Karik and Gyo had cleared this wretched nerf leaf from their bodies, the better. "Wuh-we're going."
Jembis pushed in front of him. "You can't...."
"Wuh-why not?"
"You can't, Karik...."
"Get out of our way, Jembis," Gyo said in a determined voice.
Jembis sighed and stepped away. His heart thumping hard, Karik let Gyo help him up the stairs to the deck. It was his friend who realised first that something was badly wrong. "Karik, look! Gods, no!"
Karik saw what had terrified Gyo – the same sight cleared his mind faster than a bucket of cold water in the face. They weren't at the dockside anymore – they weren't even in the harbour any more. The sun was in the wrong position too, and with horror, he realised that it must be in the east, not the west – which meant they had been on the boat all night. It was the dawn of a new day – and they must be many miles from Darshek. He whirled and glared at Jembis. "What have you done?"
Gyo was even more direct – he grabbed the other boy's shirt and began to shake him. "Take us back! I want to go home!"
Jembis held up his hand helplessly. "Can't. Now you just have to stay until we get to Utuk."
"No! Take us home – Karik, make him take us back!"
They had to speak to the captain, Karik realised. "Wuh-where's your Pa? Wuh-we need to s-see him n-now."
"He's busy...."
Gyo shook him. "You liar! Go get him! I want to go home!"
"Jembis?" Karik turned – a tall, heavyset man was walking towards them, looking rather angry. He starting shouting at Jembis in Prijian, and at them, but of course they had no idea what he was saying. Jembis answered back, the man shouted at him again and cuffed him hard across the head, sending him staggering. "You boys are stowaways. You are stealing passage on my ship."
"We're not!" Gyo shouted back. "Your son tricked us – I want to go home!"
"He says you wanted to go to Utuk to see this boy's mother."
Oh, gods.... "N-no, he tricked us," Karik said, trying to keep calm, but unable to stop the tremor in his voice. "S-said wuh-we h-had to wuh-wait below. We want to g-go home. P-please."
The captain scowled, while his son cowered against the stairs. "I'm not going to turn the damn ship around to please you, boy. You'll have to go to Utuk and find passage back. Your mother can help you. This one can speak to the embassy."
"No, please, I want to go back, Karik...." Gyo was crying now. Karik put his arm around him to comfort him. "I don't want to go to Utuk."
"Should have thought about that before you came on board without my permission. Keep out of my way, or I'll have you thrown overboard." He said something harsh-sounding to Jembis who nodded, and then stalked off.
Karik glared at Jembis. "Wuh-why? Why did you d-do this?"
He held his hands out appeasingly. "Because I thought you wanted to know about your family. Everyone should know who their father is."
"You h-have no right. G-Gyo's n-not Prijian."
Gyo looked scared and utterly miserable. "Karik, please help us get home," he whispered. "What about that woman, the mind-speaker – can she hear you?"
His mind was working too damn slowly – of course! Neka! He didn't know if she could hear him, but he tried calling her name in his mind as 'loudly' as he could. Neka! Help me!
But there was no answer – they had to be too far from Darshek. Karik pushed Gyo off him and ran after the captain who was talking to one of his men. "P-please help us."
The man turned and glared. "I told you I would have you put over the side if you annoyed me, boy. What's your father's name?"
"R-Reji, and M-Ma is J-Jena."
"Those aren't Prijian names. Why does Jembis think you want to visit your mother in Utuk?"
"I d-don't."
The captain frowned at him. "I don't have time for this, boy," he growled. "Do you have a Prijian mother or not? You must do with that colouring. What's her name?"
Karik didn't want to say, considering how much grief revealing this information had given him to this point, but he felt he had no choice. "Sei M-Mayl."
The captain went very still and the sailor he was talking to suddenly looked horrified. "You don't by any chance mean the stepmother of her Serenity's consort, do you?"
Karik had no idea who or what they were talking about. "I d-d-don't know. Sh-she's a ss-senator's daughter. That's uh-all I know."
The two men spoke together rapidly in Prijian and the captain rapped out an order which sent his man hurrying off. Then he called to his son who came over with Gyo close behind him. As Jembis approached, he got a hard slap to the face which made him cry out. "You damn boy, do you realise what you've done? This boy is kin to her Serenity! If she hears he's been mistreated...." The captain turned to Karik and smiled, giving him a little bow. "My apologies, my young sir, for my stupid son. He's rather impulsive, but he means no harm."
Karik blinked and looked at Gyo. The abrupt change in attitude seemed rather amazing. "Then yuh-you'll take us huh-home?"
He wrung his hands a little. "I can't, I'm sorry – we're eighteen hours out of port and I have to get my cargo to Utuk. But we'll make you boys comfortable until we reach Kuplik and then you can return with us."
"I want to go home now," Gyo said suddenly. "His mother will be more angry if you don't take us back."
Jembis muttered something and there was a short, angry exchange between father and son. Then Jembis said something else – Karik didn't care for the speculative look that came over the captain's face. "He says you were taken from your mother by General Arman – you realise that man is a scandal in Kuprij, a traitor to our people. If I take you back to him, I think your mother will be more angry with me than if I don't. No, you're coming to Utuk. I think there might even be a reward in it, if General Arman took you away wrongfully. You'll be well looked after, I promise. I've given orders to free up one of the officer's cabins. Jembis can wait on you."
Karik grabbed the man's shirt to plead with him. "No, p-please, I d-don't want to g-go to Utuk!"
His hands were detached with ease, and the false politeness and smile disappeared in an instant. The captain's expression was now cold and hard – and held no pity at all. "That's too bad, because you're going. Jembis, look after our valuable guests." And then he turned on his heel and walked off.
Karik rounded on Jembis. "You b-bastard! You puh-planned this!" He wasn't prone to violence but his fists itched to find an outlet for his fury and panic.
"I didn't, I really didn't, I'm sorry," Jembis said, cringing away from their anger. "I just wanted to have some company for a change and you like the animals. Gyo, you said you wanted to go on a ship and I thought Karik might want to see his mother. I didn't think of the rest of it, that's Father!"
"You liar," Gyo spat. "Karik, please, I want to go back. You have to make him change his mind."
"He won't," Jembis said, shaking his head emphatically. "Once he thinks he can make some money, that's all that matters. Money's more important to him than I am," he added bitterly. "I'm really sorry – I just thought it would be fun."
"You d-drugged us," Karik said, fixing him with a fierce glare. "You had it all p-planned ow-out."
"I just didn't want you to panic – I didn't realise you'd sleep all night. Please don't be mad at me – it was only meant to be a little fun. It gets lonely without anyone to talk to."
Looking at him, Karik realised he was really rather pathetic – bullied by his father who really seemed not to care anything for him except as an extra hand on board, and having nothing but the animals for company. He put his arm around Gyo's waist. "Wuh-we'll just ha-have to go, G-Gyo."
Gyo began to shake. Karik led him over to a hatch cover and made him sit, holding him close while he wept and wishing he could cry too. But he knew he had to be brave. It was his fault this had happened – he should never have mentioned any of Arman's revelations to Gyo, and at least should have warned him not to talk about it to anyone else.
He still felt queasy and rather dizzy from the drug, but it could have been the ship's motion. He had no idea. He put his hand over the tero stone around his neck and clutched it tight. He really wanted his Ma and Pa right now.
"Anything?"
Neka shook her head at Arman's question, seeming on the verge of tears. "I can't hear them at all. I'm so sorry, Arman, Misek."
Jera held her closer and Kei patted her hand. Across from her, Misek looked devastated, while his brother's mouth was turned down in a grim line. "Then they really must be on a ship."
"Or they're dead," Misek said, his voice breaking. "Gods, Gyo.... What will I tell his mother?"
"I don't think they're dead, Mis," Kei said in the same even tones Arman had heard him use with hysterical patients. "They could just be asleep somewhere, worn out from all the sight-seeing." Misek gave Kei a sceptical look. "All right, maybe not, but they won't be dead, damn it – how many murders do we have in Darshek in any year? One, two at most? And those are always the result of arguments."
"It doesn't have to be murder, Kei, just an accident – they were at the docks, they could have drowned or been crushed...."
Kei reached over and took his hand. "No, Mis, they couldn't. Tiko and his men have been all over the docks and nothing's been reported – you know how busy they are, someone would have seen for sure. We know they were with this Prijian lad – I bet you anything they decided to stay a bit too long on a ship, or fell asleep, or something completely innocent. I'm sure they're all right."
"You don't know that," Misek said, eyes red and weary from his long night. "Please, Arman, there must be something we can do."
"There is, but not now, Misek. In the morning, we'll alert the Andonese and Prijian embassies to be on the look out for the boys. I'll find out what ships left harbour today. Tiko will keep looking in case they're just asleep, as Kei said – or maybe fallen ill or something. I'm sure they're not dead," he said firmly. "Not both of them, and if anything had happened to one, Neka would have heard from the other, or someone would have. But you need to get some sleep, my friend. We all do. There's things we can do, but we need daylight."
"I'll keep listening, Misek," Neka said quietly. "We all will, and I'll make sure every mind-speaker in Darshek is on the look out for them."
Kei got up and went around to Misek. "Go to bed, Mis. It's long past midnight." He pulled his friend into a close embrace. "I'm sorry about this."
"It's my fault, Kei, I should never have let them out of my sight. How will I tell Reji?"
"Listen to me. It's as much my fault as anyone's, since they're in my home, but it's no one's fault – boys that age wander all over Darshek every day. It's completely safe, you know that. As for Reji...." Kei looked at Arman. "Let's not tell them yet, all right? Neka, it would be cruel to do that, until we have some news. They'll just worry pointlessly and the boys could be back here tomorrow."
Neka nodded. "I agree. I won't tell her and I'll make sure she doesn't hear from this end. But Kei, what if she asks to speak to him?"
"She won't ask for a couple of days since she spoke to him yesterday. We'll have news soon, I feel it in my bones. Jera, please go home, both of you. Thank you so much for what you've done."
"I wish it could have been more," Neka said with regret. She stood and came to Misek's side, gave him a kiss on the cheek. "I'm sorry, Misek."
He gave her a one-armed embrace, and accepted one from Jera. "Thank you."
The Gifted left, and Kei managed to persuade Misek and Risa to go to bed. Arman followed him into their own bedroom, and waited until they were undressed and under the covers before he said what he had not dared say to Misek. "You know there's something else, another factor here – Mayl."
Kei turned to him. "You can't believe she's behind this – how could she possibly have arranged it in a couple of days? She wouldn't have known he was here."
"No, but there are bound to be Prijian spies here. We can't ignore what family she married into, Kei, or the feelings of those she's close to."
"Would they harm Gyo, just to get Karik?"
"You know they would."
"Gods." Kei huddled closer, in obvious need of comfort. "I don't know what to say to Misek. I feel so guilty, Arman – one of us should have been with them. I could have made myself available."
Arman stroked down Kei's braid in a soothing gesture. "You said it yourself – the city is safe and it is. I should have thought of this, if anyone."
"But if they've gone to Utuk.... We can get them back, yes?"
"Gyo, certainly. It depends on who knows what about Karik, and how important they think that is. I'll get Lord Meki to speak to Yuko in Utuk tomorrow. The biggest card we have is that the Prij won't want to anger the Rulers, not overtly – so if I can convince Lord Meki to make it clear Karik is under his personal protection, that will help. That's assuming they're on their way to Utuk or anywhere at all."
He sighed and rubbed his eyes. They'd been frantic for hours, every since he'd got back after sunset and Kei realised the boys, who had not come home, weren't with him. The army had been notified, Tiko recruited as a safe pair of hands to lead the search, the menagerie director questioned as had been his staff. Karik's distinctive appearance had made him memorable, and once Neka had been brought in, it had been relatively easy to discover that the Prijian boy they'd been seen with at the menagerie had also been seen with them at the docks. The boy was known to people at the port, as was his father's ship, but because it had all been very late by the time this had all been found out, as yet it hadn't been possible to determine where the ship was going, or if the boys were likely to be on it.
Arman had a strong feeling that his conversation with Karik the day before was somehow connected with their disappearance. If that was the case, then the boy hadn't kept his word not to make enquiries, which was more than disappointing. But whatever his views, Karik was important to those Arman loved and cared for. Arman would do whatever he could do to get him home, the same as if the boy really were his son. He just hoped the lads had decided to take a nap somewhere and turned up sheepish and apologetic tomorrow. If they didn't...things could get very unpleasant indeed.
Gyo didn't cry for long. There wasn't any point, really, since what was done was done. After only a few minutes holding onto Karik, he sat up and blew his nose. "I guess it's a bit like what happened to Ma," he said in a shaky voice.
"Y-yes. Wuh-we need to be b-brave."
Gyo sniffed again. "Pa is going to go crazy with worry. Yours too. I'm sorry, Ka-chi. This is my fault. I should have kept my mouth shut. I just didn't think this would happen."
Karik patted his shoulder, even though it really would have been better if he had kept quiet. "N-No one could kn-know. Th-they wuh-won't hurt us. Wuh-when we g-get to U-Utuk, you g-go to the eh-embassy."
"You too, Karik. I don't care what that bastard says, you belong to Reji and Jena, not some strange bitch in Utuk." Then Gyo looked at him and blushed. "I, uh... she's your mother...."
"It's a-all right. Sh-she's nuh-nothing to me."
"What did he mean, 'stepmother'? And what's a consort?"
"D-don't know." Karik knew what 'her Serenity' was – that was the title of the sovereign of the Prij. If the captain thought he was some kind of relative of the ruler, no wonder he thought there was money involved. "G-Gyo, wuh-when we g-get to U-Utuk, we have to l-lie. S-say it's a j-joke."
"You mean, tell them she's not your mother?" Karik nodded. "I can do that. Jembis will get into trouble with his Pa, though."
"T-too bad. D-don't trust him."
"Neither do I. I'm really scared, Ka-chi."
Karik could feel him trembling. He hugged Gyo a little closer. "I'm here," he whispered. "We j-just need to stay together."
Misek was up with the dawn, Arman wasn't in the least surprised to see, even though that meant he had only got about four hours sleep. He and his brother looked haggard, and Pira, red-eyed herself, fussed over them. Everyone was punishing themselves for letting the boys out of their sight, but Arman knew the blame was almost certainly fairly and squarely on his own shoulders. For Misek's sake, he put on a firm, confident expression, and spoke in authoritative tones about how simple things would be if the boys were, as they now suspected, on a ship to Utuk. It seemed to do a little good. Kei said he would stay with his friends, and keep in touch with matters via Neka and the other mind-speakers. He urged Arman to go to the Rulers' House and do what he could.
Despite the early hour, he was surprised to see Tiko waiting for him at the House. It looked as if the captain hadn't got to sleep at all, but he had news. "That Prijian boy's father owns a ship called the 'Tears of Lady Punis', and it was taking a load of wild animals from Andon to Utuk. It stopped here to pick up other cargo and a few caged birds. What do you think are the chances the boys went on board to look at the animals, and either forgot the time or were forced to stay?"
"Quite high. Good work, Tiko." Arman had known their friend would come through for them. "Will you keep searching? I don't want to assume that's where they went, although it seems most likely – it's just possible they wandered off to look at something, or got persuaded to leave Darshek by some other route, even back up through the pass."
"Of course. Two other ships left yesterday evening, both bound for Andon port. I've already arranged for four of my men to take the next ship headed that way to make enquiries at that end, but I'm not really expecting them to find anything. Is Kei at the house?"
Arman nodded. "And Misek and Risa too. They're out of their minds with worry."
"Can you blame them?" Tiko said with a grim look. "If it was my grandson or daughter gone missing, I'd be frantic. Will his lordship order a ship to try and intercept this boat out of Utuk?"
"I doubt it. Leave that to me, Tiko. Thank you," Arman said, clapping the man on the shoulder. "I know Kei's grateful too."
"I'll try and stop by today. I'll turn the search over to my lieutenant and get some sleep, but I'll be back on it this afternoon. Damn it, this shouldn't happen to Darshianese children."
Arman didn't reply to that, since sixteen years before, he'd been personally responsibly for removing boys and girls Gyo's age from their homes – something Tiko was well aware of. But Tiko refrained from pointing it out, and as he left, Arman knew he would be as good as his word and the search of Darshek would be thorough. Although it was looking more and more likely that the boys were on the 'Tears of Lady Punis', they could also be on another ship headed almost anywhere. That was something he needed Lord Meki's help with.
The Ruler was sympathetic and listened carefully to Arman's briefing. Arman put Tiko's question to him, but as he suspected, Lord Meki refused, albeit with obvious regret. "We simply can't, Arman. It could be seen as an act of war if we have to force the ship to stop, and though this is a personal tragedy for your friends, I won't risk sailors or the peace for them when we have other avenues to pursue. We're not even completely sure they're even on the boat. I'm sorry, but no."
"I thought you would say that. But the embassy, you'll contact them?"
He nodded. "I'll do it immediately and make it clear this is a matter of personal importance."
But Arman had more to tell him. "Meki, Karik's mother, my former wife – she remarried. Her husband is Senator Mekus, who is the father of Prijus, the husband of the Prijian sovereign." The Ruler was looking at him as if he was wondering why Arman was giving him a genealogy lesson. "He's Karik's real father, though he would never claim him."
Lord Meki drew in a sharp breath and looked truly irritated. "And you never thought to ever mention this to me before?"
"I'm sorry, I never thought it was important and since...since speaking of the matter is not something I enjoy...."
He made a sharply dismissive gesture at Arman's words. "So, not only is this boy Prijian, he's related to the crown by marriage? Arman, do you realise how this complicates things?"
"Yes, I do," he answered, accepting Lord Meki's annoyance as only just. "I don't know that Karik's mentioned it, or that it's got anything to do with his disappearance, but there's a possibility – a strong one – that it does."
Lord Meki sighed. "Blessed gods. Well, for now, we can only do as we've planned to do – try to make sure the boys are met directly off the ship and put on the first boat back, if that's where they end up. I'll promise financial reimbursement if that becomes an issue. And we just will have to damn well hope no one finds out who he really is. I knew this matter would come back to haunt you, Arman. I believe I said so at the time."
Arman bowed his head. "Yes, you did. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have told Karik about his mother at all."
"It's too late for that now," Lord Meki said impatiently. "Let me speak to Neka now."
Since communication with Utuk meant using the network of mind-speakers in Darshian (and care had to be taken to avoid broadcasting the bad news to Jena), the conversation with the embassy took some time. The ambassador was told to keep things as discreet and low-key as he could, to keep the boys in the embassy itself and to arrange passage home for them as soon as he could. The ambassador promised to have someone at the docks constantly from the earliest possible arrival in seven days' time, so that the 'Tears of Lady Punis' wouldn't slip in unnoticed.
Lord Meki thanked Neka and ended the conversation. "I'll send a letter to the Andon embassy with Captain Tiko's men as well. But now we wait, or rather your poor friends wait. I feel for their pain, Arman. Please tell them if we can do anything else, we will."
"Thank you, I will. Knowing that we've put these arrangements in place will help."
"One hopes so. Right, now you go back and be with them."
"I can...."
Lord Meki held up a hand. "No. Your friends need you, so does Kei. See this as training for when you're a Ruler, Arman. You're not indispensable, or if you are, we're doing something wrong."
Arman huffed impatiently. "You're supposed to be resting, Meki. I promised Kei you would be taking it easier from now on."
"I am, Arman. I haven't got any meetings today, and all I was going to do was look over reports in my personal rooms."
"Then you need me here to deal with enquiries...."
"We have a staff who can deal with those. Take your own advice and go. At the very least you can help these fellows finish their business here. We'll speak tomorrow, but until those boys are located, I expect you to spend more time with them than with me. That's an order."
Arman made an ironic salute. "Yes, my lord. Thank you for your consideration."
He chafed at being ordered to leave his duties aside – he couldn't see how he could help Misek and Risa by just sitting around and being worried with them – but there was no doubt when he returned to the house, that Kei was glad to see him back. Misek and Risa looked much as they had when he'd left, Pira hovering anxiously and trying to offer comfort. It wasn't doing any of them any good, he thought with some impatience, but when he passed on the reports to the brothers, he fancied they were a little less worn looking, a little more hopeful. He portrayed things as positively as possible, and carefully refrained from mentioning anything to do with Mayl or the sovereign. If that became pertinent, it would only affect Karik, so there was no point in worrying Misek about his own son.
Risa cleared his throat. "Kei, we really should tell Jena and Reji now. They have a right to know, and besides, Jena might hear accidentally from the other mind-speakers."
Kei started and looked rather as if he hadn't thought of that. "True, but I would spare them the worry."
"Tell them," Misek said heavily. "I'd want to know, even though it means worrying. I'd be angry if I found out it had been concealed from me."
"Are you sure, Mis?" Kei asked gently. "It's not like they can do anything."
"Nor can I, but at least their friends can help them." He managed to scrape up the ghost of a smile onto his battered face. "And they'll know how much you're trying to do."
"Arman? I think you and I should tell them together."
Arman agreed that was the best approach. "Misek, there's something else. Risa, I think you should head back to the village soon as you can...."
"No, I need to stay with Mis...."
Misek held his hand up. "No, Risa, I think I know what he means. When the boys get back, they'll not want to spend weeks on the road, and if they are in Utuk, it will mean a delay of at least two weeks before you leave. You know Ai-Albon needs the stores." He looked at Arman. "Though I can't leave, Arman. I just can't. But Risa can't manage four wagons on his own or even just with me."
"Yes, I know. We can arrange help for him from the barracks, and when Gyo and Karik come back, we can send the rest of you all home on a fast cart. With any luck, you'll arrive home just after Risa, but the boys won't have the strain of a long journey."
"You can do that? It would really help."
Risa laid his hand on his brother's shoulder. "Mis, I really don't like the idea of leaving you here on your own."
"I'm not on my own, Risa-ki – I have Kei and Arman. There's Vikis and Kesa too if I need a shoulder to cry on. Reji and Jena need you, and the village needs the goods."
Pira set a pot of tea down on the table and looked down at the visitors with sympathy in her lined features. "We'll do everything to help you, Misek," she said quietly.
"Let's not turn this into a bigger mess than it needs to be, Risa," Arman said, "this way the harm this will cause will be kept to a minimum. There's nothing you can do here anyway, and you know it."
Kei, who'd been listening to the exchange in silence, now spoke up. "Risa, I'm guessing the boys will feel damn bad about all this when they get back – it will only make it worse if they feel guilty over delaying your return. Mis is right – Reji and Jena will need you there. If you don't go, then I will. I think they need someone now."
"Don't be stupid, Kei, it makes no sense for you to go when I have to return there anyway," Risa said harshly. "I can't leave today or tomorrow anyway. I'm still arranging the stores."
"I can help you with that," Arman said. "Just leave when you would normally. I'm just saying that to delay more than that is pointless."
"I'll be all right, Risa," Misek said. "Better that you get on and keep busy. I don't...." His voice caught. "I just don't think...."
Risa pulled him into a hug. "It's all right, brother, I can do this without you. You have more important things to worry about. When he gets home, we nail his feet to the ground, all right? Karik's too."
Arman heard Misek give a sobbed, muffled laugh against his brother's shoulder. Kei looked at Arman. "Come to the library," he said quietly, motioning in that direction with a tilt of his head.
Pira nodded at them as they left – Arman knew she would look after them, feed them tea or whatever they needed. There was so little else they could do right now.
Now he had no longer to keep a cheerful face on for his friends, Kei's true emotions were revealed. He looked both strained and very tired. "I don't know how I can tell them their son is missing," he murmured as Arman put his arms around him. "It will kill them."
"No, it won't. It would be a different matter if Karik were dead but he's not, I'm sure he's not."
Kei sighed. "Yes. Damn, I've broken worse news to people and not been this upset before, but it's different when it's someone you love."
His expression became intent and a moment later, Arman heard Neka's voice in his head. Yes, Kei?
Neka, we're going to tell Jena and Reji about Karik. Can you contact her?
Yes, of course. The mind-speaker also sounded tired, and Arman regretted that she was having to carry so much of the burden of this matter. He rather wished they had left it until the afternoon, but Risa was right – there was every chance Jena would hear about this accidentally.
It took several minutes before Kei could begin speaking to his friend, as Jena was with a patient and wanted to wait until she was back at her house with Reji. Neka allowed Kei and Arman to 'see' them as Kei imparted the grim news. Jena listened in silence. Reji looking utterly stricken. Arman explained quickly what measures were being put in place. When Arman was finished, and Jena still didn't speak, Kei said, Jena? Are you all right?
Arman saw Reji's arm slip around her waist, and there were tears in her eyes as she answered. This has been my nightmare for sixteen years, she whispered. That my son would be stolen from me. It's to do with you telling him about his mother, isn't it, Arman?
We don't know, Jena. Possibly. It doesn't help, unfortunately, if he has told anyone.
You should have kept it a secret, she said fiercely.
I wanted to, Arman protested. I thought you both thought he needed to know the truth.
Yes, and now my son is missing!
Reji squeezed her a little. Jena, love, you're not being fair. Arman, I'm coming to Darshek....
You're damn well not, Reji, Arman snapped. Not only can you do no good, you'll be a positive distraction and someone else we'll need to look after. I'm sending Risa back as soon as he can manage it, and Misek will bring the boys back personally.
You can't stop me coming to the capital, Arman.
Just try me, Reji. This is not the time for panic or idiotic gestures. Right now, Lord Meki and I can do far more in this case than you can. We've got the army searching, Neka is working hard and the embassies in two countries are on alert. What do you think you can do that we can't?
I can help Mis....
Kei looked at Arman, and Arman could tell his lover thought Reji had a point. More gently, he said, He's got Kei and me, Reji. Jena needs you there.
Reji wiped his eyes. He was looking a lot older than his forty-three years. How is Misek coping?
He's handling it about as well as one could ask. He's still trying to get it straight in his mind. Risa will be here for a few days. Jena, he's not said anything about telling Pia, so please don't mention it, and if you could tell Ai-Tuek not to....
Of course I will, she said roughly. Damn Prij, every time we have anything to do with them, they cause us pain. Bring my son home, Arman.
I'll do my best, I swear to you. Any sacrifice, I promise. But you must promise to stay calm and not come here unless you're requested. Will you do that?
Jena looked at her lover. Yes, Reji said finally. But, damn it, Arman, it goes against all my instincts.
Kei spoke. I know it does, Rei-ki. But he's right, you can't do any good and you could interfere with matters quite badly. It's going to be hard enough handling Mis. Please don't add to that.
Tell him we're thinking of him. Gods, Pia will go mad if she finds out.
Then make sure she doesn't. We'll keep you informed of anything we learn, and if you want to talk, I'm sure Neka or one of the others will find time to let you do that.
Reji gave Kei a sad smile. I'm sorry for the trouble, Keichichi.
Don't be an arse, Reji. I feel bad enough as it is, I should have kept the boys here....
You couldn't, you can't, Kei. That's something I've learned the hard way. Children need freedom, just as you had, I had. Karik's a very sensible boy. I don't know how this happened, but at least Gyo's got a solid friend there.
He's a good lad, a credit to you both, Kei said with a sad smile. He'll be home soon, I know he will. He cleared his throat, even though he wasn't using it to talk. Are you recovered, Rei-ki?
Pretty well. I might ride up and meet Risa when I know he's left.
If you wait a week or so, you can ride out and meet the boys, Arman said. You've borne worse, both of you. I know you'll be brave now. Misek will need to know you're coping.
We'll cope, Jena said grimly. But I will want a reckoning from whoever took my son, do you hear me, Arman?
Yes, I do. So will I. Jena, Neka's been up all night....
I'm sure. Thank you, Neka. Thank you, Kei, Arman, she said with an uncharacteristic formality, which in Arman's experience, either meant she was very angry or very upset. Possibly both. Keep us informed, please. And then the connection, and the vision of Jena and Reji, suddenly disappeared.
Thank you, Neka, Arman said, and the mind-speaker acknowledged that before she 'closed' the link.
Kei gave Arman a shaky smile. "She's angry. She blames us."
Arman took his hand. "I think she blames whoever took them and we're just caught in the crossfire. It'll be all right, Kei."
"You can't make that promise, Arman."
"I can promise to exert myself to the limit to make sure they come back. Don't underestimate my abilities, Master healer."
Kei gave a little choked laugh. "Oh, I would never do that, general. I just hope you can match your boast."
So do I, Arman thought. So do I.
Voyaging - Chapter 8
It was really too cold to be on deck. Neither of them were wearing their jackets since they weren't expecting to be abducted by a rather impulsive teenager. The only crew on deck were Prijian or Andonese, and Karik couldn't really face trying to get their assistance. He just didn't trust them.
Jembis was the only alternative, but Karik had no idea where he'd gone. He sat shivering in the strong wind, holding onto Gyo and wondering if there was the slightest hope this was all just a bad dream.
A voice came from behind them. "Are you still mad at me?"
Karik turned and frowned at Jembis. "Y-yes."
"You keep away from us," Gyo said. "This is all your fault."
"Yes, I know it is. I'm sorry." He came and crouched in front of them. "I thought it would be an adventure," he said miserably. "You're such nice fellows and no one's really bothered to talk to me before about the animals."
"M-Maybe b-but you sh-should have ah-asked."
"I know. Look, we've got a week together – can't you put this aside? Father's set me to look after you."
"We don't need your help...." Gyo started to say, but Karik hushed him, because unfortunately they did.
"Wuh-we're cold," he said.
"Then come to the cabin," Jembis said eagerly. "I can bring you some bread and tea."
"So you can drug us again?" Gyo snapped.
"I won't, why would I? I swear, no more drugs."
Gyo snorted with disbelief. "Y-you t-taste everything," Karik insisted.
"Yes, I will. I didn't mean to hurt you," Jembis said, pleading with his eyes. Karik remained unmoved. The older boy was charming and apparently sincere, but if he hadn't told his father about Arman, the captain would not now be thinking of trying to make money off Karik. Karik found it hard to forgive him for that.
But while they were on board this ship, he was the only ally they had, and since they really had no choice but to cooperate, it was probably best not to make the boy angry. "C-come on, Gyo."
His friend was reluctant but Karik was now cold, hungry and still feeling odd from the drug. He wanted to find a place where they could be safe and warm.
The cabin where they were taken was tiny, and showed signs of having been hastily vacated. "It's the first mate's cabin," Jembis explained. "Only my father has a better one."
"Wuh-where do you sleep?"
"In the hold, with the animals if we're carrying them or with the cargo if we aren't. I don't have a cabin of my own. I could sleep with my father but he says I'm too big for that now. I prefer the hold to that anyway." He showed them where things were stowed, the basin and the chamberpot, and then took them to the galley where they could get water and food. The cook gave them bread and tea, which Karik assumed was safe enough since they would hardly drug the entire crew. Besides, there was little point in doing that now.
He took them back to the cramped little cabin – Karik and Gyo would have to share a small bed but it was no worse than camping on the trail, he supposed. "I don't have any clothes or jackets spare," Jembis said. "I guess you'll need to stay below deck. You can come and look at the animals anytime you want. I don't suppose you'll want to keep me company."
"I think you should go away," Gyo said, turning his back on the older boy.
"Wuh-we need time a-alone," Karik said in a more conciliatory tone.
"I know. I'll be down in the hold. Anyone can help you find me – they all speak Darshianese."
Did they? They would need to be careful what they talked about, Karik realised. He nodded to Jembis who finally left them alone.
Karik sipped the tea – it was just ordinary tea, a bit strong, flavoured with honey, but nothing strange. The bread was hard and rather tasteless, but he was hungry. Gyo didn't seem to want to eat. "I-it'll get c-cold, Gyo."
"Don't want it. I want to go home." Karik just looked at him until he sighed and picked up his mug of tea. "I know, I'm being stupid. I'm just so mad at him."
"I kn-know, but we n-need him."
"Karik, what if the ship sinks? I can't swim, neither can you."
"D-don't think about it. J-just drink, e-eat the bread." The last thing they needed was Gyo dreaming up all the ways this could get any worse – as if Karik needed any help to imagine that.
Much as they both wanted to hide from the crew and the captain, it simply was too boring, and the prospect of seeing the ship too fascinating. Karik knew that under other circumstances, this journey would be Gyo's idea of heaven, just as the academy had been his. If Gyo wasn't to be utterly miserable for the next seven or eight days, Karik had to encourage him to look on the positive side of things, and not to dwell on the injustice, or on how much he missed his father.
For that reason, he talked Gyo into going and finding Jembis. The older boy was pathetically glad to see them, desperate for any sign he'd been forgiven, and trying so hard to make up for what he'd done, that Karik found it hard to stay angry at quite the same level of white heat as he felt on first learning of his deception. Gyo remained balky, which was no surprise, but even he let Jembis coax him into hand-feeding the baby birds, and to watching the lizards sleeping in their box. He listened politely to Jembis' tales of travelling to Andon, of life on board the ship, and even began to answer, rather warily, questions about the herbarium. The second his family was mentioned, he shut up, and Jembis quickly worked out what Gyo would and wouldn't talk about. This made for an easier time for all of them.
Gyo remained wary all day and refused to let Jembis bring them food, or to join them in the cabin when night came. Karik couldn't blame him, because however much they pretended, they were both frightened and worried – and Jembis was responsible for that. Gyo ate his supper in silence, but as Karik chewed the hard ship bread, he saw a tear slip down his friend's cheek. He put his hand on Gyo's arm. "It'll b-be all right."
Gyo sniffed and nodded. "I'm sorry. I want to be brave, just...." He lifted his head and looked at Karik. "Just... Ma'll cry. I hate it when she cries."
Karik put his arm around Gyo's shoulders, feeling his own eyes getting wet too. However bad it was for them, what must it be like for his parents, for Misek and Pia and Risa, not knowing what had happened to them. At least Karik and Gyo knew they were safe for now. It was seven days to Utuk. It was going to feel so much longer.
They were too tired not to sleep, and the next day was a little easier, now the shock had worn off and their anger had dulled. It was genuinely interesting to work with the captive animals, and Jembis really could be entertaining. Gyo perked up a little, even though his distrust remained. The captain spoke to them a couple of times, but Karik didn't repeat the mistake of giving the man any more personal information. The man spoke more often to his son when they were on deck, and it was clear that father and son did not enjoy a loving relationship. In fact, the captain was downright cruel to his boy, which roused Karik's sympathy and even Gyo's ire. "It's not right, no matter what he's done to us," Gyo said as they ate supper that night. "He's the only family Jembis has got. It's not right."
"No," Karik agreed. He supposed it was surprising that Jembis was so sweet-tempered, considering, but the older boy threw himself into working with the animals, and being friendly with the crew. There was no doubt he was lonely, though. It was such a shame. In other circumstances, they would have been friends. But that wasn't possible now – not with this crime colouring everything.
For four days, the trip was uneventful, and bearable. But then the sea grew rough as dark clouds gathered overhead, and the captain told them to get to their cabin and stay there. Gyo was already showing signs that his sea legs were not going to be up to worse motion. Karik was unaffected, but he was concerned for his friend, already lying on the bunk and looking pale. Jembis came in shortly afterwards. "We're in for a couple of days of bad weather, the first mate says. Oh – are you sick?" he asked Gyo. "It's only going to get worse. You'd better take...."
"No drugs," Gyo said firmly, then put his hand over his mouth in a gesture Karik instantly recognised. He grabbed the chamberpot and let his friend empty his stomach. Karik was grateful that years of working with both parents had inured him to most smells and sounds, but Jembis looked green as Gyo continued puking.
Jembis went with him to dispose of the mess and spoke to Karik as he was cleaning the pot in the sluices. "Karik, he's going to be like that for days if you don't let me help."
Karik looked at him with suspicion. "You j-just wuh-want to put him to sleep – but l-last time you did that, yuh-you tricked us."
"I know, I know, I'm really sorry – but you don't know how bad seasickness can get. He could die if it goes on long enough," he said, earnestness in his voice which Karik found it hard to disbelieve, even with their history.
"Is there nuh-nothing else?"
"Only things to help replace what's been lost, but it won't stop him being sick. I swear, Karik – it's much kinder to let him sleep it out. If it gets worse, I'll be taking nerf leaf, you can bet."
Karik sighed. "Give me the m-makings and tell me the d-doses. He wuh-won't accept it from you. I wuh-won't be taking it so d-don't think you c-can pull anything, Jembis."
"I won't, I promise. Oh, I wish you would trust me, Karik. I'm really sorry for what I did."
Well, that still didn't make Karik trust him, however sincere Jembis' regret seemed. Jembis took him to the small apothecary store where drugs for men and animals alike were kept. "You can take it by mouth, but it tastes horrible. Tea with lots of honey is better – make it strong, and it's good if he's been puking. If he can't take things by mouth, um...." Karik wondered why he seemed so embarrassed. "Well, you can...."
He made a gesture that puzzled Karik – until he suddenly realised. "By the r-rectum?"
"His arse, yes."
He still seemed embarrassed, but Karik understood the use of suppositories, and knew it was perfectly reasonable to give treatment that way if the patient couldn't swallow. "J-just show me huh-how."
The ship was rocking badly now, so the process of making the paste to be used as Jembis said had to be described rather than shown. Karik was given sufficient dried nerf leaf for all his needs. "There's a risk we could sink if the weather gets really bad, but no ship had sunk in this part of the route for over sixty years," Jembis said quietly. Karik stared at him in horror. "Just saying though – you don't want to give Gyo too much or you won't be able to wake him if we need to abandon ship."
"But...he c-can't swim." Neither could Karik, not all that well, anyway.
"Hells, neither can I. Make sure you keep a lamp burning in the night and grab onto a bit of wood. If the sharks don't get us, there are always ships passing on this route and we'll get picked up. Don't look so worried, Karik."
Karik blinked at the frankly unreasonable request. "Are you s-serious? How wuh-will I sleep now?"
Jembis shrugged. "Same as you always do. We could sink any time, Karik."
Karik pursed his lips. "I h-hate you," he spat.
"I know," Jembis said softly. "I really am sorry. I just...just wanted a friend of my own."
"D-did you r-really think we'd l-like you fuh-for this?"
"I didn't think. Father's right in that at least." His shoulders slumped. "Look, if the weather gets rough, I'll come and sit with you, even if I feel sick. I'll get you out if there's any problem. I won't even take any nerf leaf – I'll stay awake."
Karik appreciated the gesture at least. "The a-animals?"
"Well, I'll have to look after them too but they don't take all my time, you know that. Why don't you go the galley, get some tea for Gyo and I'll meet you back in the cabin." He placed a hesitant hand on Karik's shoulder. "Gods, Karik, I wish I could undo this."
So did Karik, but it was a useless wish. "J-just get us th-there safe."
Jembis nodded and walked away. Karik began to collect up the supplies so he could go to the galley, but Jembis' words kept ringing in his head. If they sank...he wouldn't dare sleep while Gyo was drugged. Someone had to have a clear head if there was a shipwreck....
The next three days were the hardest he'd ever endured. Even with the nerf leaf, Gyo suffered a good deal of sickness and when he wasn't actually throwing up or in a drugged sleep, he was frightened and anxious. The weather became truly alarming, at least to Karik's mind, although Jembis assured him it really wasn't as bad as it got, and they were a long way from being really in danger.
Jembis brought blankets and thin pallets for them to sleep on in the cabin, which at least cushioned the frequent falls as the boat plunged through huge waves and suffered under fierce thunderstorms. He told Karik the ship was a sound one and had been through much worse – his father, he said, was one of the most experienced on the route, and knew all the dangers. But that didn't stop Karik's anxiety, and Gyo's constant weakness was another worry. All he could do was try and get some tea and honey down his friend's throat to replace all the liquid he was losing, but Gyo looked dreadful and moaned piteously when he was awake, wanting his mother and father, and sounding very young and scared.
If it hadn't been for Jembis' company, Karik thought he would have gone insane from worry. The older boy suffered from seasickness too. He seemed to control it better with the nerf leaf tea which made him drowsy, but he somehow managed to stay awake most of the time. Between the two of them, they made sure Gyo was never left without a conscious attendant, but it was very tiring, at least for Karik. Several times he wished he could just drink the nerf leaf tea too and sleep this all away but he was older than Gyo and therefore had a responsibility to him. He would never forgive himself if anything happened to his friend.
Jembis respected Karik's continuing anger, but when Karik needed reassurance, at least he could give it, and when Karik wanted to talk, or to have something to distract him, Jembis was there too. If the Prijian boy could restrain his impulses to stupid acts as he'd committed, he would make a good man, Karik thought. If he could get away from his brute of a father, he'd be more likely to make friends of his own too.
The three days took a real toll on all of them. Karik was dirty, tired and bruised by the end of it. It was impossible to stay clean, or to get hot food – tea was only available for a couple of hours a day, and they had had to resort to the suppositories twice for Gyo. When he wasn't tending to Gyo, or napping while Jembis kept watch, or trying not to be tossed around the cabin, Karik just sat in a corner wrapped in a blankets and prayed for this ordeal to be over soon and safely, his hand on his parents' gift of the tero stone, telling himself that they would never rest until they brought him home. He had to believe in that – but when he was exhausted and cold, it was sometimes hard to keep that faith.
Finally, the weather moderated during the fourth night, and at dawn, Karik found with profound relief that the ship was rocking with nothing more than a gentle rolling motion. Gyo was still sleeping, and looked far from well. Karik decided not to disturb him, but needing to get some fresh air, he was glad to leave the cabin and come up on deck. Jembis, who had slipped out to feed the animals, was there and smiled. "How is he?"
"S-still sleeping. Is it over?"
"Yes, thank the gods. I thought I was going to lose one of the tewi cubs, poor little bugger's been so ill, but he's all right now. We'll be in Utuk harbour in a few hours."
Even though it had been expected, Karik couldn't help the fear rising inside him, making his stomach tight and his heart race. He touched Jembis' arm. "P-please help us, J-Jembis. H-help me g-get home."
Jembis regarded him seriously. "How? Just tell me, Karik, I want to make it up to you."
"P-please. H-help us get to the eh-embassy? B-before?"
Jembis gnawed on his lip. "All right." He looked around to see if they were being overhead, and bent lower. "When we get to port, we'll make a run for it. I know where the Darshianese embassy is, and if we get there first, I can hand you over to them before the Prij get to you. But Father will beat the shit out of me," he said mournfully.
Karik looked at him. He had no wish to see Jembis hurt, but he didn't want to be forced to stay in Utuk either. "C-can't you s-stay with us?"
"I'm not an adult yet, Karik. Father controls me until I'm eighteen and that's half a year away. But I'll lie for you. He's not allowed to kill me. Anything short of that, though, he can do."
Karik felt sick. He'd never been struck in his life, and although a couple of the village children had been given several strokes of a stick when they had done something not only wrong but very dangerous, none of the adults he knew habitually cuffed and slapped their children the way Jembis' father did. "I'm sorry," he whispered.
"Oh, don't worry, when I reach eighteen, I'm off. I already know what I'll do – I'm going to Andon to look after the animals they catch from the wild. Maybe I'll even start my own menagerie."
Despite the cheerful words, Karik could tell Jembis was afraid of his father's wrath. He would ask the embassy to try and protect him, but he didn't know if they would or even could. He already hated the Prij if this was how they treated their children.
He fetched some breakfast, although between his anxiety and the lack of sleep, he had little appetite, and brought it up on deck where the sailors were swabbing the decks and, so it seemed to him, making repairs to damage caused by the bad weather. As the hours passed, the sun grew hot and burned off the water lying on the deck. The sailors seemed full of energy, perhaps because their destination was approaching. Even now, he could see the island of Kuplik coming ever closer.
A couple of hours after dawn, Gyo staggered up on deck. Karik told him the news, and couldn't hold back a shiver of anxiety. Soon their fate would be known. Gyo put a comforting arm around his shoulders. "I won't let them hurt you, Ka-chi," he said stoutly. "I won't let them take you away either."
Karik leaned against his tall friend, glad of the comfort but uneasily aware that even Gyo's bravery wouldn't protect him. Jembis kept a diplomatic distance while the two friends watched the island of Kuplik draw ever closer.
It was close to noon before they got close to the coast, and began to negotiate their way through the moored ships towards the harbour. The entrance to the harbour was down a long cliff-lined passage. Karik could see huge cannons and armed soldiers along the cliffs at various points, and he shook a little as he thought what this meant for him. Nothing he or Gyo or even Jembis could do would stop soldiers doing what they wanted. Like Gyo at the start of this nightmare, he wondered if this was how his mother had felt when the Prij had come to take her from her home.
It seemed to take a long time to actually dock the ship, and there was a lot of frenzied shouting and activity, sails being hauled up and down, ropes thrown to the sounds of tortured grinding of the wooden boat against the dock. But at last gangplanks were being put in place. Karik found he was shaking again – would they make it? Jembis, who had stood with them for the last half hour as they came into dock, nodded. "Right, you boys, come with me," he whispered. "Follow my lead."
They moved surreptitiously to the gangway, but not discreetly enough as the captain was heard to bellow Jembis' name, followed by a burst of angry Prijian.
"Run! Down the gangplank!"
Gyo grabbed Karik's hand and pulled him along, racing down the gangplank to the accompaniment of the angry shouts of the captain and other crew. They didn't even stop to look to see if Jembis was behind them, although Karik heard him shouting to them to keep running, not to stop.
Unfortunately, they hadn't figured on there being someone on the ground who was very interested in them doing just that. Suddenly, they found themselves surrounded by soldiers, and in Karik's panicked state, it took a few moments for him to realise that the soldiers weren't Prijian, but Darshianese. They were held firmly but carefully by four men, and a fifth, not a soldier, but also Darshianese, came towards them. "Are you Gyo and Karik? Karik of Ai-Albon?"
Unable to speak for fear, Karik could only nod. The man gave them a wide smile. "Oh good. Don't be afraid, lads, I work for the embassy. I'm here to get you to safety."
Jembis seemed to have melted away, but Karik could see the captain pushing his way through the milling throngs of people. "We n-n-ne...." Karik stuttered, tugging on the man's sleeve, unable to force the words out and almost choking in his panic.
"That man's the one who took us," Gyo said urgently. "We've got to get away!"
"And so you will. Lieutenant?"
The soldier whistled, and a carriage was brought up. Gyo and Karik were bundled into it along with the embassy official and one of the soldiers, and another took the reins, whipped the jesigs and got them clipping along at a good rate away from the docks.
The relief was so great, Karik almost wanted to be sick. "Are we safe?" he whispered to Gyo, clinging to him, feeling weak all of a sudden.
"You're safe, lads," the official said. "You've got some very worried people waiting for you back in Darshek, and I've been assured by Lord Meki that if anything happens to you, it's my arse that'll be kicked. Are you all right? You're not injured or sick?"
Karik shook his head and Gyo assured the man they were all right. "Who are you?" Gyo asked.
He stuck out his hand, and Gyo shook it hesitantly. "Urso, assistant to the ambassador. Ah, there we are."
They had come to a large white building with an imposing looking fence of stone and metal guarding it. Large gates were swung open and their carriage admitted. Once the gates closed behind them, Karik let out a breath, finally believing they were now safe. It would be all right – somehow, Arman and Kei and the others had found out about the abduction and arranged their rescue. It was all nearly over and hopefully they would be going home soon.
The embassy was a very formal, rather cold place – he somehow knew it wasn't something a Darshianese had designed – but everywhere were his own people. Urso led them through echoing halls to a chamber, and told them to sit. "I'll fetch the ambassador. And after that, you can eat and bathe and rest. Perhaps not in that order," he said, wrinkling his nose. "We'd best get you some clothes. Leave all that to me."
One of the soldiers waited with them, but it was clear they weren't under guard. It was more so they didn't feel they'd been abandoned. Karik couldn't stop shaking, which was odd because they were now safe. Gyo kept his arm around him, which felt good, and Karik put his hand on his tero stone for comfort too. Did his parents even know he'd been missing? Would they find out he'd been rescued?
In a few minutes, they heard footsteps, and a tall, middle-aged Darshianese man approached them, smiling and holding out his hand in welcome. "Hello boys, I'm Yuko, the ambassador. Come with me to my office so I can just check what's been happening to you, and then I can send a message to Lord Meki."
He took them just a short distance to a very big office, with wide windows that opened out to a garden behind the building. "So, you've had quite the adventure. Can you tell me what happened?"
Karik let Gyo do the talking. He'd held himself so taut all morning, and had been so worried, that he now felt exhausted on top of the lack of sleep. He was conscious they were both dirty and untidy, and it had been a long time since a sparse breakfast. He just wanted to do something completely normal and stay away from boats for as long as he could.
Gyo finished his tale, and the ambassador turned to Karik. "So this man, this captain, knows who your mother is, Karik?"
"Y-yes. P-please don't l-let them take me."
"With any luck, you'll be out of Utuk before there's any problem. Urso has a list of ships and knows when they're departing. We'll put you on the first boat back to Darshek, I promise you that, and I'll send two soldiers with you to keep you safe." He looked a little preoccupied for a moment or two, but then he smiled. "Let's get you fed and watered. You can use one of our guest chambers – I'm sure the Rulers won't mind lending it out to you this once."
Gyo's eyes went wide at that, but he said nothing as they trailed behind the ambassador back along the hall and then up a flight of stairs. "The facilities are as Darshianese as we can make them, so there's a decent bath. There's robes in the cupboard – probably a bit too big for you, but you won't mind, I'm sure. Leave your clothes out and they'll be cleaned. We'll have to beg clothes from some of the staff I think." The ambassador showed them the washroom and stoked the bath stove himself. "I'd like you not to leave these rooms without an escort. See this?" He indicated a long length of material on the wall. "If you need anything, pull that." He did just that. "In a minute or two, someone will come and I'll ask them for a meal for you. Then I'll let you have some peace – you both look tired, so I think a nap wouldn't hurt you, even though it's early."
Karik let the man's chatter wash over him. The promised servant came, and the food arrived not long after. Gyo fell on it eagerly – fresh fruit, good bread and milk all made a great change from the food on the ship. Karik ate too, but for all he thought he was hungry, he found his appetite died pretty quickly. He wanted to get the stink of the animals and the ship off him, and even before Gyo had finished eating, Karik had excused himself to use the washroom. He stripped his disgusting clothes off and tossed them aside – he wondered if they would ever be clean again – before slowly and methodically cleaning a week's worth of grime off his skin and out of his hair. He swore he was pounds lighter by the time he'd rinsed off. Gyo had come to join him by then, and like Karik, clearly relished getting clean again. "I hate ships more than I hate trading," he said with feeling. "I guess we have to put up with it a little longer, but we'll be home soon. Do you feel all right, Karik? You look a little pale."
Karik had to sit on the stool – he felt odd all of a sudden. "I j-just...." To his shock, he began to shake very hard. He hugged himself but it didn't seem to help.
Gyo crouched in front of him, his hand on Karik's knee. "Shhh, Ka-chi, it's all over."
"I kn-know...." Perhaps that was why he was so upset now – he'd held himself in check all week, trying to be brave for Gyo, to help him, and now he didn't have to. "I want m-my M-Ma."
"There, there," Gyo soothed, holding him close. "You were so calm on the boat, I thought you weren't afraid at all, not right until this morning, but I guess you were scared too?"
Karik nodded, resting his head against Gyo's bare wet shoulder. He felt such a fool.
Gyo let him rest for a bit then urged him to his feet. "Get into the bath, Karik, you'll feel better. That's what Ma always says to me."
Voyaging - Chapter 9
The news came just before noon, and Arman knew it was something he had to pass on in person. He walked the short distance between the Rulers' House and the academy with more of a spring in his step than he'd had in a week, and the moment he walked through Kei's office door, his lover guessed. "They're safe?"
"They're safe," Arman confirmed. Misek looked as if he didn't know whether to laugh or to cry. Arman came to him and put a hand on his shoulder. "Yuko says they'll be on a boat back to Darshek by noon tomorrow. They're tired, dirty, hungry and completely safe."
Misek hid his face in his hands. Kei came from behind his desk and knelt next to his friend, holding him close and letting the tears of relief come out. Misek had had an appalling week. Risa had left four days ago with a very heavy conscience, and although Kei had done his best to keep Misek busy looking at papers and plant specimens, having him talk to the gardeners about new techniques, it was obvious the man was just a ghost, drifting through the days until he could get word of his precious child. Rarely had Arman had so much delight in bringing news to someone.
"So what happened to them?" Kei asked. "How did they end up in Utuk?"
Arman sat on the edge of the desk. "Apparently it was a prank gone wrong. They met this Jembis and told him rather too much about Karik's past, and the boy tricked them into being on board when the boat sailed. Used a drug on them, if you can believe it. But there's no harm from it, and Yuko's man got them away from the ship easily enough."
"And Karik?"
Arman met Kei's eyes. "So far, nothing. The captain knows who his mother is, but little more. Yuko certainly won't confirm anything along those lines, and he's going to keep quiet about it. Once they're on board, they'll be safe. And then they'll be back in eight days."
"Oh, gods. Thank you, Arman. Thank everyone who's helped, please," Misek said, his eyes still red, but his smile brighter than it had been for over a week.
"I will. Now, finally, I hope you can get some decent sleep so you can get your boy home without falling off the cart."
Kei grinned. "Do you have to go back to the Rulers' House? I think I could be free."
Arman was going to refuse, because there were things he had to do – but then he looked at Kei's face, Misek's face, and knew that his lover and his friend needed time with him that wasn't being spent in tortured waiting. "Of course. Can we afford a meal from a vendor?"
"I think the budget can stretch that far," Kei said, his smile now blinding. "I might even be able to buy us all a beer."
Misek put his hand on Kei's arm. "No, this time the beer is on me."
It was good to sleep in a real bed, but even so and even with the lack of sleep, he only managed a couple of hours – it was the middle of the day after all and his body was telling he should be awake. He sat up, yawning, and his movement woke Gyo who rubbed his eyes. "I'm hungry again," he said.
"That's b-because you th-threw up s-so much."
"Maybe. Did someone come in before?"
Karik hadn't heard, but when they went out into the main room, there were clean clothes neatly folded on a chair, and the dirty items had been removed. The clothes were a little small for Gyo, and a little big for Karik, but it was pure pleasure being clean once more so they had no complaints. "Do you think anyone's around?"
He didn't know, but when he opened the door, there was a soldier standing on guard, who nonetheless gave him a friendly smile. "Ah, the ambassador would like you to stay here, lads. But it won't be for long – they've organised berths for you both back to Darshek tomorrow morning. So enjoy dry land while you can."
Gyo was ecstatic. "Tomorrow? We're going back!"
Karik hugged him. It was so much better news than they'd been expecting. Gyo insisted on ringing the bell pull for more food, even though Karik thought it might be seen as greedy. "Don't be silly, Ka-chi, they can afford it." Karik rolled his eyes – that wasn't the point at all.
The housekeeper who came didn't seem at all put out by the request for food and even seemed to be expecting it. "You can keep those clothes, boys. Your own ones might still be a little damp by the time you go on board, but if you hang them out where you're told, they'll dry soon enough."
She told them that the ambassador had been called to the palace but he would come and see them later. In the meantime, they were to stay in the room. Karik didn't mind – there were plenty of books and it wasn't for long. The food, when it arrived, was delicious soup and more of the good bread, which filled even Gyo's emptiness. Replete and feeling safe, with the prospect of home to look forward to, there were worse ways to spend a grey afternoon than to stretch out on the bed, a book in hand and to just enjoy a few hours peace and quiet. He had no curiosity at all to see Utuk, the place of his birth. Kuprij and all its natives only meant danger, a threat to his family and pain. He just wanted to leave it and them as quickly as humanly possibly.
He read for hours and dozed a little again. Gyo nudged him awake. "Someone's at the door." Just as he spoke, the knock came again.
Karik sat up and followed Gyo out into the main room again. The ambassador was already there. The look on the man's face meant bad news, Karik just knew it. He asked them to sit, and then took a chair himself. "I gather you've heard you're going home, tomorrow, Gyo."
Karik couldn't help noticing the omission. "N-not me?"
"I'm afraid there's a problem, Karik...."
Arman let fly with some oaths he hadn't used from his army days. "Pissing Mekus. I'll strangle him. You're not going to let them get away with this, my lord?"
Kei and Misek were silent, wisely deciding to let Arman say what they were all thinking, he knew. "I don't know that I've got much choice. You heard Yuko. If he refuses to hand Karik over, the Prij will put the word out that Prijian children are being kidnapped. If they try and force the boys onto the ship, there'll be a fight – and that could end with the boys injured or dead."
Misek made a small sound of distress at those words. "Then I'm going to Utuk."
"And I'm going with you," Kei said.
Arman turned to him. "No. I beg you, Kei, don't push yourself into this task." Kei was giving him one of his stubborn glares. "Look, I don't want a single other person there they can use as a hostage against me, and you would be a prize and a half for them. Misek, you have to make sure Gyo leaves too."
"They won't risk war with Darshian over this," Kei said. "Not over one young boy."
"It's not about Karik, Kei, it's about me," Arman said heavily. "This is Kita and Mekus' dream come true. I told Karik this wasn't something to bruit about – I thought he understood. Why didn't the stupid boy keep his mouth shut?"
"Karik's a child, don't blame him over a pissing match between adults," Kei snapped.
"Gentlemen, this doesn't advance us," Lord Meki interrupted. "Arman, if you're serious about going to Utuk, then you need to find out when you can leave. Misek, Neka will make it possible for you to talk to Gyo if necessary but he has to get onto that boat at dawn – Arman's right, we don't want any hostages, and with his parentage also under a cloud, we can't afford to leave him there."
"He'll fight me," Misek said, his expression grim. "He'll not leave Karik there."
"I know. You have to convince him that it's the best for all concerned."
Arman ignored the discussion going on as he asked Neka to let him talk to the harbour master. "There's a ship leaving at three in the morning," he announced when he was done. "I can be on that."
"Arman, you can't do this on your own," Kei said quietly, taking his hand, looking at him with a worried expression.
"It's a mess of my own making, Kei. I just don't want anyone else to suffer, and I would never forgive myself if Mekus or Kita got their hands on you. Please...don't fight me on this," he pleaded, using his eyes shamefully.
"You shouldn't have to do this on your own."
"I won't be alone, Kei. My father and brother will support me." He tilted Kei's face for a kiss. "I owe you for that."
"I'll worry every moment you're gone."
"I know, and I regret that. Will you take some comfort from the fact that knowing you are safe will give me considerable peace?"
"For that reason and that reason alone, will I abide by your request. We need to get you ready for the trip. Misek?"
Misek raised his hand to make them stay silent. Arman realised he must be speaking to Gyo. They waited until he was done. "He's going to go. But he hates me," Misek said resignedly.
"He'll survive," Arman said with the readiness of a man who'd ordered others to do far worse things. "My lord, I need to pack and arrange my affairs." This matter was badly timed, but he could hardly expect to let Karik stew in Utuk because Arman wanted to work on the harbour redevelopment.
He looked at Lord Meki who shooed him away. "I can read your mind, Arman, and I can tell you I'll be fine. Good thing you're leaving Kei here to bully me."
"I'll be even stricter than I would have been before, I'm warning you, my lord," Kei said with a tight smile. He turned to Arman. "We should go."
"Give me a little time to sort out my desk and make some notes." Arman bowed to the Ruler. "I'll send you a full report from Utuk."
"I'll expect that. I'll make sure your loved ones are safe, Arman. You will have to deal with this as a private citizen, but whatever help and support we, the Rulers, and the embassy can give you, you can depend on."
"Thank you, my lord, but Karik's best hope, ironically, is for me to firmly establish his credentials as a son of the Prij. Kei, Misek, come to my office."
He sorted his affairs out quickly – he habitually left his papers as if someone else might have to take over at a moment's notice, a carry over from his army days when he faced death daily. All he had to do was finalise the minor things he had dealt with that day, and hand the notes to Lord Meki's secretary, who took them away with a bow and best wishes for his enterprise. Then he went back to see the Ruler for a few last arrangements. One request he had to make was that his nomination as a Ruler be delayed until he returned. Lord Meki agreed immediately – bruiting about Arman's importance to Darshian at this time could potentially harm them all. There would, Lord Meki said, be plenty of time to sort that out when he returned, and then wished him luck for his journey.
After that, it was a tense twenty minute walk back to the house. "What will you tell Jena and Reji?" Kei asked.
Arman turned to Misek. "You're a father. I need your guidance."
Misek considered. "They need to know," he finally said. "Not knowing is the worst thing. But how you stop Reji storming to Utuk, I don't know."
"Leave that to me," Kei said. "Arman, can they hurt you? Keep you prisoner? You're technically a traitor."
"Not officially. Mekus is going to make things unpleasant for me and as inconvenient as he can, I know that. But they won't risk outright confrontation." He stopped and turned to Kei. "This could take a while," he murmured, pulling him close.
"I know. I know you will do what needs to be done, and I'll wait for you. Karik is precious to me and those I love, Arman. I thank you for this."
"Mekus isn't going to win this," Arman said roughly. Part of him desperately wanted Kei with him, but the greater part of him wanted anyone remotely important to him as far away as possible from Utuk and all it represented. "Misek, when Gyo arrives, just take him home. It could be a month or more before Karik arrives. I'll get him home safely, you can promise that to Reji."
"As you wish. This entire venture has been ill-omened from the start. All we wanted was our boys to have a taste of the big wide world," he said bitterly.
"A worthy motive, Misek. Things have just been very unfortunate – this boy playing a trick wasn't anything we could have predicted."
They walked the rest of the distance in silence. Pira was quickly informed of events, and hastened to help Arman prepare his pack. Kei undertook to find the papers he said he wanted. Misek kept out of the way, like the sensible man he was.
Arman finally shooed Pira out of their bedroom and dragged Kei down to sit on the bed. "Damn your expressive eyes," he murmured, kissing the eyelids that briefly hid those all too powerful windows to his lover's heart. "Do you hate me?"
"No. I'm worried sick, but you would expect me to be."
"Kei, I need you to look after Meki. More than usual. He doesn't need this on top of his other responsibilities. He's not been taking it as easy as he promised."
"I'll be fierce. I might even have to be rude," he said with the ghost of a grin.
Arman kissed him again. "You do that. He can handle it." He stroked his hand down Kei's braid. There were one or two bright silver threads among the dark brown, but it was still as silky and sleek as ever, as was Kei. "Do we have time to make love?"
"We'll make time," Kei said. "You realise this will be the first time we've been apart for more than a night in sixteen years."
"Don't remind me. I hope it will be the last."
"Lord Peika wants you to go to Andon if you're appointed Ruler," Kei murmured, taking his earlobe gently between his teeth.
"Think about that when we've returned. I will bring him back, I swear."
"I know. I never doubted that."
Arman bore Kei down to the bed and kissed him gently as he began to unlace his shirt and trousers. Kei's arms went around his neck and Arman could see the unspoken needs in his lover's eyes, for him not to go, to go, to take Kei with him – all warring, all being held under control by Kei's intelligence, his rationality, but above all, by his love, the rock solid foundation of Arman's life, the one thing he never doubted. The thing that made every sacrifice, every sorrow or regret, as light as feathers upon his soul.
As graceful at thirty-six as he had been at twenty, Kei shimmied out of his clothes, and by dint of long practice and innate skill, he managed to strip Arman almost before Arman had formed the idea of doing so. "I never know how you do that," Arman said wryly, contemplating the clothes on the floor and his smiling, now stark naked lover beneath him. "You must use your gift."
"No, it's just amazing what someone who's properly motivated can do."
"Yes, I suppose it is," Arman murmured, bending to kiss Kei again, at the same time, reaching for the pot of hand cream they kept by the bed for such things. Again, long practice made it easier to scoop some out one-handed, and to raise Kei's leg onto his shoulder. "I'm sorry – may I be greedy? I want to have you, and have you now. I just...."
"Want to stake your claim?" Kei said lightly, but still with the same love and understanding in his eyes. "You never need to ask, Arman."
His need was urgent, but his touch was gentle, for whatever Kei said, Arman could never take him or his pleasure for granted. He began to apply the cream, and his lover shuddered, arching his body and exposing his neck. Arman bit carefully at the graceful juncture of neck and body, accepting the submission as the gift it was.
Even with his need, he took his time. For him, lovemaking had always been less about his own pleasure than watching Kei lose himself in sensation. Knowing how deeply Kei felt things, experienced things, Arman knew it was no small matter to make him forget himself for even a few moments, to make him writhe in abandoned delight, to gasp as Arman filled him and pleasured him, no longer the inexperienced man Kei had first bedded, but now one fully trained in the art of making love to this exquisite man. Arman knew every single place on Kei's body that made him tingle, every pulse point that he could lick and tease carefully with lips and teeth, how to judge when Kei had become too sensitive to endure more nipple play, and when he needed more, tinged with a little delicate pain, to tip him over into gasping orgasm that made him clutch at Arman's back to the point of leaving bruises. The joy he got from seeing that, feeling Kei's passion, made his own climax almost unimportant, though his body welcomed the release from the tension it brought.
The hands that had been clawing at him moments before, now slid behind his neck and drew him down. "You needed that," Kei said dryly. "Perhaps I should start coming over to the Ruler's house at lunch to relieve your tension."
"Any day I'm preparing to leave you for weeks, feel free to do so." The sex had brought him only the slightest respite from his anxiety, and even though he knew Kei would feel the return of that emotion and be made anxious in turn, there was nothing he could do about it. All he could do was let Kei hold him and wish there was some answer other than this. Of course, there wasn't.
"Love – I know why you don't want me to go with you, and I accept that. But are you so sure I wouldn't give you more benefit than disadvantage?"
Kei was staring at him seriously and Arman knew this was no manipulation. They had worked as a team for a long time, separately but united in purpose and in love. He turned over the facts one more time, but regretfully came to the same conclusion. "I'm sorry, Kei. I can pretty much predict the kind of things that will happen to me. But what might happen to you...." He raised Kei's hand and kissed it. "Even if it weren't so risky, don't dismiss the effect returning to Utuk might have on you. You only returned before for the very briefest of times. To spend weeks there.... And I really do need you here too. Misek needs you, Meki needs you. I'm sorry to be selfish."
Kei sighed. "Don't apologise for that, you nitwit. It's we Darshianese who should apologise for putting you in this situation."
Arman sat back. "You haven't done that in a long time," he said, feeling a little stung.
"What?"
"Distinguished between me and true Darshianese."
Kei sat up, apology already in his expression. "No, Arman, I didn't mean that... damn, I'm sorry, it's just all the talk of dealing with the Prij. You're one of us, you know you are. You're going to be one of our Rulers soon." He reached behind Arman's head and tugged the heavy braid. "And this proves it. I didn't mean it, truly."
Arman knew he didn't and accepted the apology. He knew there would always be a distinction, however slight, in the minds of all who knew him, but why that should matter when the only distinction he cared to claim was that of being Kei's lover, he didn't know. "We should bathe and then go to supper."
Kei laid his head on Arman's shoulder. "Already?" he murmured. "Time slips away so fast."
"Then it won't be long before I return. And I will, Kei. Kita isn't that stupid. She won't risk a war with the Darshianese alliance over me, not even for her husband or her father-in-law. Even if she would, the rest of the senate would not. It'll take a little while, but I'll come home, I swear that, and Karik will come back with me too. Mekus won't want the boy for more than the ability to torment me – Karik's stutter will disgust him, and that's a good thing. Mayl won't want someone like him near her either."
"What a lovely pair," Kei said, grimacing.
"Oh, indeed. Perfectly matched. Karik is loved and valued for many things they are too stupid to see, and what they do see, I hope will make them want to get rid of him as quickly as they can."
"More fool them, then. I want that boy here, Arman. I've set my heart on him working for me." He glared at Arman. "Darshian needs him and Kuprij won't value him. Bring Karik home."
"Yes, Master Kei," Arman said, dropping a kiss on one smooth cheek. "But we should get moving."
There was still time for another embrace, some more unhurried kisses. But then they really had to go.
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How does it feel to be raised by people who look nothing like you, and to know that the secrets of your past are too terrible to be spoken of? Sixteen years after Kei’s Gift, young Karik is taking his first steps into the wider world. But the question of his parentage, and the role Arman played in his history, are mysteries Karik needs to solve. But in doing that, he gets a lot more than he bargained for – and to face the new challenges, he’ll need to grow up. In a hurry. Landing softly is a side story to Falling from the tree, and follows one of the minor characters on their own journey to find their destiny. Download for US$ 4.99 Buy in print for US$ 15.40 |